Title: Enough
Author: lacrossegirl1097
Pairing: Prentiss/Reid
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds or is characters.
Notes: There are spoilers up through Minimal Loss (4x03)
Summary: Is it enough? Will it be enough?

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.....Emily's P.O.V....

Enough. She has had enough of this. This, which she could not manage to classify just what this was. She certainly has had enough waking to an empty bed. Enough trying to grip to the last shreds of her hope that somehow, people can be kind and that some people can only do good. Enough finding release in someone who is just looking for an escape, someone who is perhaps substituting you with the drugs that once captivated them. Almost pushed them into the deep abyss of insanity, the thing they most tried to keep at bay. Enough with hearing sweet nothings in her ear while he pounds into her, things she wonders if they are lies he tells or really something more. Her heart wishes them to be true, but her head is not sure. Too many times she has been let down.

Enough wishing the kisses could last forever. Hoping, praying that the moments when it was just them could last. When she would snake her fingers through his hair and he would caress her jaw. The secret meetings and rendezvous at each other's apartments after difficult cases. The sneaking around, at first it was thrilling like a special thing they shared. No one else knew, and they could escape. Nothing can last.

Enough. Enough being the girl she always hated. The kind of girl who pinned away after a guy, a pathetic kind of girl. She never knew how deep you could fall for someone. This was defiantly not in her plan. 'No strings attached' seemed like a great offer. A way to escape, a release. It all started after the incident at the ranch in La Platta. Maybe it was her fault, she offered to buy him some coffee because she knew, even after their talk on the plane, he still blamed himself. Then coffee turned into talking at her place, which evolved into a kiss, and the next thing she knew they were in her bed. His hands all over her body. Skin on skin. It's like they could get their clothes off fast enough. When they finally joined, they clicked and the world, as cliché as it sounded, seemed to slow a little bit.

Enough. Enough wasting hope that maybe the next time he comes knocking on her door everything would change. That he would come in saying that he wanted something more. That he didn't want a quick fuck; he wanted to make love to her until they collapsed from sheer ecstasy. Enough saying that the next time would be the last time. Enough being so completely wrapped up in everything that is him.

She wants to say that she has had enough, but when he looks at her, just before she is pushed over the edge of passion, so content and happy, looking at her like she is the only thing in this world that matters...how can she tell him no when she's looking right back at him, the same look, same happiness?

Enough. It's the mantra she tells herself as she silently watches him slip on his clothes and tie his ratty converse. Her voice seems caught in her throat as he kisses he temple and runs his hand down the side of her face.

It will never be enough.

She can never get enough.

For now his touches can be enough.

***

.....Reid's P.O.V....

Enough. Enough finding solace in someone who deserves better. Enough trying to push away the feelings that have consumed him his whole life, of never being good enough. Enough believing that is he could just lose himself in her one more time everything would be alright. That she could be his rock, his person.

Enough. Enough of the pain he sees behind her eyes that she can compartmentalize away, but not quick enough for a profiler to not see, when he slide his cardigan back on. She toys with the edge of her bed sheet, refusing to meet him in the eyes. Enough. Enough causing that pain, that hurt. It might be too much, but he pushes down those feelings and walks away.

Enough. Enough being a coward. He had always told himself he would never be his father. Abandoning someone he cares for. He does, care. Hell, it's pretty evident that he might even love her. He doesn't just love the sex. That is just the release, the escape. The moment he enters her, that familiar and new feeling at the same time, it is heaven. But, because he is a coward, he cannot own up to the feelings and tell her.

Enough. Enough hoping that she felt the same way. He knew after this began that is was just a way to use each other as liberation of the stress that accompanied the job. A way to have someone who understood that sometimes after seeing what they see, words just aren't needed. His head and logic knew that this wasn't what she wanted, but his heart felt a yearning for something deeper. Not just because he needed something else, but because he respected her and knew she deserved better.

Enough. Enough saying that this would be the last time. That this would be the last time he showed up at her door, looking for that feeling of being completely separate from his life. From his body. From his mind. Separate. But then she would step aside, letting him enter. Surrendering their bodies to each other. Grappling at the idea of losing themselves in each other. She would kiss him in a way that made him groan a deep, feral sound that he didn't know belonged to him. He would push her towards the bedroom, couch, sometimes and the kitchen counter of wall. It was fast and deep and perfection. He would bury his face in her neck and she would drag her nails down his back. It was always almost too much to take.

Enough. Enough pulling out of her feeling both satisfied and empty. Barren inside. The yearning for her has become almost all consuming. He dreams about her. Thinks about her. Always. Her lips on his cheek. Her breath in his ear, throaty moans as she comes. Enough.

He would tell her tonight. Enough. Maybe. Possibly. Or maybe the next time...

***

.....Emily's P.O.V....

Enough. Enough fucking around. Literally. She was spent. The late night trysts. The quick glances while the others slept on the jet. She saw it in his eyes, the lust. But behind the passion she saw something deeper. She was done hoping he felt the same way. Wondering if he would ever make a move towards a relationship. An actual relationship. Not just sex and emptiness. But loving touches. Holding one another. Going out, seeing a movie, talking, having dinner. Normal things. But then again she was never really normal...

"Enough" Her forever mantra echoed in her skull as she white-knuckled the steering wheel home. The case had been awful. For a week they had been in Mississippi, hunting a man who was kidnapping, torturing, and eviscerating young girls. It was horrific. The whole case shook everyone. Not that every case isn't bad, but this one...By the time they caught him, he had just killed his 8th. They were too late. On the ride home, no one spoke. J.J. fell asleep on the couch. Rossi nodded off at the chair in the corner. Morgan was sleeping to his own soundtrack, while even Hotch had passed out after reviewing files for a while. Everyone seemed to fall into a restless sleep, except for the two of them. She sat at the table, book in her hand but eyes out the window. He sits down across from her, each hand clutching a cup of coffee.

"I thought you might need something." He whispered.

She gazes at him for a moment, lost in his hazel eyes, then composes herself. Reaches for the cup, smiles politely like the good diplomat's daughter that she is, and takes a sip. Then she goes back to her stargazing. She hoped he would take the hint.

He didn't, "Look, I know that this case was hard. If you want to talk..." he began, but she cut him off with a harsh whisper,

"Oh really? You think I want to talk? Now you think I want to talk?" She rolled her eyes and continued to stare hard out the window. Undertones of hurt laced her voice, and it didn't take a profiler to hear it.

She saw him sigh out of the corner of her eye. Turning to him,

"You know, it's not that I do want to talk. Or need to talk, for that matter. But it's just..." she glances out the window again for a moment.

"It's just that you never seemed eager to do any talking before." She turned back to him, looked

him in the eyes and said,

"Why start now?" With that Emily resumed looking anywhere but at him.

Like she said before, she has had enough.

.....Reid's P.O.V....

Enough. Enough being a stupid, pathetic coward. God. Seeing her sitting there seemed like the perfect opportunity to talk. Because maybe if they used their words instead of their bodies for a change, things might go differently for once.

He was stupid to think a woman like Emily Prentiss could be used like he has been using her. Although, in retrospect, they have been using each other. Never the less, thinking she would ever want something real and something genuine with him. She is beautiful, smart, funny, caring, essentially everything he could ever want in a woman; anything anyone would ever want. He was a basket-case, ex-drug addict who has enough baggage to fill an airplane carrier. Why would anyone want to be with him?

He though a peace-offering of caffeine and sympathy would be enough to get her to open up to him. He had been wrong. Really why would he expect her to think that he wanted to really talk. Every other time that they even established eye contact on the way home it was for one reason and one reason only. It had become their unspoken system of communication.

He was not giving up, not today. She meant more to him than just trying once and then letting her walk away when she doesn't fall at his feet. She has gotten under his skin. He can't get her out of his mind, out of his dreams. He's not giving up. Not yet.

He reaches out, takes one of her hands in his and leans in to whisper,

"I don't just want to...that's not why I'm talking to you. I really do want to talk."

She looked at him with confusion in her eyes.

"Why? Why now?" She asked, trying but failing miserably at masking her true emotions. Actually seeing her façade crack was pretty daunting. She was normally so composed, ok maybe not always composed. She sure lets down her composure when it's just the two of them in the soft light of her living room. Fucking like maniacs on her plush couch, going at it so hard and fast that they would fall onto the rug below them. Not caring because they were so lost in each other. Like if they just pushed a little further, then they would be able to become one.

He looked her straight in the eyes and said,

"If not now, then when?"

.....Emily's P.O.V....

Enough. Enough pushing people away, thinking she wasn't good enough. That she didn't deserve him. Hearing him say that simple fact made her think twice before just brushing him off again. Avoiding what they had been avoiding since they first began their tryst. Hearing that solidified the possibility that there was hope to find something great in the complicated 'thing' they have going on.

She sighed and stared back at him, "Fine. Your place or mine?"

She saw his eyes brighten; the edges of his mouth perk up in a small smile. A rare sight these days. He looked relieved as he replied,

"Dealer's choice."

.....Reid's P.O.V....

Enough. Enough lying to himself. Thinking he could never get the girl. Sure he had his share of problems. But he never let himself have anything that made him feel the way she does. He has always been taking care to keep people at arms length. Not anymore.

After they touched down in Quantico, they all moved in a drowsy flock towards their cars. Everyone said goodnight as they looked forward to a four-day vacation. He glanced at her; they locked eyes, then got in their respected vehicles and drove in the direction of her brownstone.

The drive to her home was only 20 minutes, but it felt like an eternity. He just kept saying to himself, "No more. Enough. No more. Enough. I will tell her..."

.....Emily's P.O.V....

She didn't know if she could wait anymore to talk to him, but soon enough she pulled into her parking lot. She sat in the car, waiting until she saw his headlights, and watched him pull into the space two down from hers. She took three deep breaths as she watched him walk over to her car. Pulling herself together she stepped out of the car.

"Hey, let me just grab my bag." She said, trying to keep herself grounded but as soon as she saw his go-bag in his hand she knew he was serious.

They went up the steps to her impressive home. As she opened the door, every single memory she had of them together here came flooding back at her. Shaking her head she tried to subdue those thought, that's not what her heart wanted. She was trying to start something better, not just revert back to what they were so used to doing.

She placed her bag on the ground by her counter, and then turned to look at him. Him. Spencer. Reid. Dr. Reid. Whatever you call him, he was here and not for the normal reasons. Him. Who knew that she loved it when he would stroke the underside of her knee. That despite her powerful personality, she loved it when he took charge, and was dominant. Who knew that she had a birthmark about two inches above her hipbone and a tattoo of Arabic script on her left side.

He had made his way into her life, heart, and head long before they started this. He was always so intriguing to her. She had never met anyone like him. Thinking about it she probably never will. There was only one Spencer Reid.

.....Reid's P.O.V....

He set his bag down beside the door. When he turned around she was there, staring him down, looking absolutely stunning. To him she always looked beautiful. Whether she was clad in Kevlar, in the round table room, saying goodnight at their current hotel, or underneath him in the throes of passion. She was perfect.

With a deep breath he walked up so he was across from her and said,

"We need to talk." He saw her breath catch in her throat for a minute. Before she replied,

"Alright. Go ahead." She crossed her arms in an obvious defensive stance.

"Ok. We can't...What we're doing is not..." he sighed. Nothing seemed to come out right.

"It's ok." She said. "You don't need to say it. This won't affect our work. We can just pretend that none of this ever happened." She began to turn away from him, but he reached out and grabbed her arm.

"I don't want to keep doing this. That's because I can't. I can't keep separating my feelings and my actions. I cannot keep doing this. I can't just keep coming here to make myself feel better while completely disregarding you and your feelings...I guess what I am saying is that I want something more. If you don't I can just...go."

.....Emily's P.O.V....

Her jaw dropped slightly. He wanted to take this to a different place as well. She felt her heart swell at his words. Any other man would say it was because of his needs. Only Reid would talk about disregarding her feelings. Which was why she made the next move that she did.

She walked around the counter, grabbed the back of his head and pulled him down for a kiss. But not just what they normally did. She tried to put everything she felt for him in this kiss. She felt him wrap his arms around her waist and drag her as close to him as possible. He responded with as much enthusiasm as she was giving.

He broke it off after a few minutes and said

"I'm not kidding. I want to start something with you. I can't just screw you and then leave anymore. I'm just sorry I didn't say anything sooner."

She looked at him with a smile, one that broke her whole face out in happiness and spread to her eyes. She brushed his hair back and said,

"I wouldn't have agreed to talk to you if I didn't want something more." With that she kissed him again with equal vigor. He pushed her against the counter and lifted her up until she was sitting on it. At that height she was just about eye to eye with him. Breaking the kiss she said four words that she knew once she said she could turn back,

"Take me to bed."

.....Reid's P.O.V....

He. Was. Ecstatic.

In his arms was the most wonderful woman in the world. The familiar dance to her bedroom was second nature to them. He watched her sit down on the bed, a coy smile on her face. She looked at him and said,

"Come here." He smiled back and moved so he was half kneeling on the bed; one knee between her two legs and kissed her like a thirsty man drinking water. Her hands moved to his tie, which she easily undid. He moved to the buttons on her blouse. His magician fingers worked their magic and in no time he had her down to her black lace bra. It left little to the imagination. He took a deep breath. Despite the fact that they had been together many times before, he was actually nervous. She was so beautiful, and the fact that she wanted something too made this time not just some quick fuck. He was going to make love to her until they passed out.

She had also undone the buttons on his shirt. She was dragging her nails up and down his back, teasing him. She knew that drove him crazy. He nudged her to move up the bed. She laid down on her soft comforter, and he began to kiss his way down her body. He removed her bra and cupped her breasts in his hands. He began to tease one nipple with his breath, and watched them harden under his touch. Her moans edged him one and he took one bud in his mouth.

"God, Spencer." She moaned in a breathy voice.

He smiled as he moved to her other nipple. Her hands gripped the sheet and she was writhing under his touch.

"Please Spencer, more..." With that plea, he began his decent downward. Nuzzling her navel as his fingers undid the snap on her pants, then he took the zipper in his mouth and her moans intensified. He slid his hands under the waistband of her lacy underwear. He could smell her arousal as he moved his hands up and down her thighs. His fingers traced her lips and her whole body became tense with anticipation. He moved his head down and began to suckle her clit. She bucked up at the sensation.

"GodSpencerpleasedon'tstopeverpleasepleasedon'"

Her words were jumbled together as her inhibitions crumbled around her. He could feel her inner muscles tighten around his fingers. Her hands tangled in his hair. That combined with her pleas edged him on to move faster, pumping his fingers in and out faster and faster until she broke apart.

"God yes Spencer. Please, oh god I'm coming! Don't stop. Yes!" She slumped against the bed after the waves of pleasure rode through her. He crawled back up her body and kissed her deeply. He was so happy that he could make her come apart like that. That he caused her to feel so good aroused him to no end.

.....Emily's P.O.V....

She couldn't catch her breath. That was the best orgasm she had had in a while, and normally sex with him was amazing so that was saying something.

She opened her eyes and looked up at him. His eyes were so kind and full of life; then she remembered that she needed to give him some release. A thanks. Give and take.

She stroked him through his pants. One hand undid his slacks and slipped into his underwear and began to run her hand over his erect member. His eyes slid closed and his mouth opened with throaty moans as she began to quick her pace. She rolled over him so she was straddling his legs. He pushed his pants and underwear down, and then she took him all in her mouth.

"Ugh. God Emily that's sooooo good." His moans reverberated off the walls of her bedroom. She fondled his balls in one hand and took him deep in his mouth. She could tell he was close, so she quickened her pace. Moving faster and faster.

"YES! God, just like that. I'm gonna...Emily!" With that he came hard. His hands gripping her soft, raven hair, bucking into her mouth. She kept sucking him until he came down from his high.

She moved next to him on the bed, watching his chest rise and fall as he tried to regain his breath. He turned to her and kissed her. Gentle and sweet. A thanks.

"You are so beautiful Em." When those words came out of his mouth, she believed them.

She rolled over to her bedside table, opened the drawer, and rolled back over with a condom in hand. She gripped his length in her hand again and began to stroke him back to full hardness. He stroked and rolled her nipples between his fingers. Soon he was ready for her, and she was wet with anticipation.

She ripped the foil package and removed the condom. He hissed with pleasure as she rolled it down his cock. She propped herself up on her knees and positioned herself over him. His hands guided her hips down onto him. Each of them groaned as they joined as one. She leaned forward so her hands were on either side of his head. She ground down on him as a signal for him to start moving. He pumped into her with great vigor. Kissing her neck, face, lips sporadically. Their moans joined together as each began to lose their rhythm. He was losing control and she could feel him getting close. His one hand moved between them and used the pad of his thumb to rub her clit in hard, fast circles. That was one thing. He always wanted her to come first.

She grit her teeth as the additional sensation made her losing control. She leaned back so she was sitting straight up on him. The shift in position caused both of them to gasp. She could feel him reach places in her that she didn't even know existed. He hands moved to his thighs as she leant her head back, her breast bouncing with each thrust. She was so close.

"Spencer, god I'm almost there." He moved his thumb faster on her clit. She was gasping for air as she felt the wave coming over her, ready to crest.

"Yes! Harder! Just like that Spencer, I'm...god! Yes I'm coming!" She said his name over and over as he continued to pump into her, moving his thumb over her clit. Prolonging her orgasm.

.....Reid's P.O.V....

As she came around his painfully hard cock, it took all his self-restraint to not come with her. But he wanted her to be completely satisfied. As she was riding out her orgasm he rolled them over so he was over her. She opened her eyes and said,

"Come on Spencer. I want you to come inside me. Please, I want you to take me. Make me yours." With that he drove into her him rhythm already ragged. In three thrusts he was coming.

"Emily. God baby, yeah. You feel so amazing. I'm coming! Yes!" He leaned down and buried his face in her shoulder. They both laid there panting like they had just run a 5K nonstop. Her hands held him in place like a life preserver. He went to roll onto his side but she stopped him.

"Please, just lay here for one more minute." Her voice was so small, so vulnerable. He looked at her and nodded. Bringing her closer to him, he laid over her. His feelings for her so strong that they scared him. But he was not going to run away from them. He loved her too much to leave her now. He was going to dive in. Sink or swim.

.....Emily's P.O.V....

She woke up to a warm embrace and smiled. She rolled over and gazed at the sleeping being next to her. He really did look so peaceful and young when he slept. She glanced at the clock which read 11:35. They were really tired from last night. After their first encounter, they had "done the deed" another three times. She knew that they needed to establish some new rules and maybe go out on an actual date. There was time for that late, right now all she wanted to do was stay in bed with him all day. She snuggled closer to him and drifted to sleep for a little while. When she woke up an hour later she was alone. Before she could panic she heard sounds coming from her kitchen. She slipped out of bed and put on her black silk robe.

Following the sounds she smiled as she saw him simultaneously making bacon, toast, eggs, and coffee. She walked up to him and wrapped her arms around him waist, her fingers skating just under the waistband of his boxers.

"Good morning." She whispered with a kiss to the back of his neck.

He turned around and smiled down at her, then he leaned down for a kiss.

"Yes it is." He replied, then kissed her again. He turned back to the task at hand.

'I hope you're hungry." He said

"Oh, I'm famished from last night." She said smiling as she sat down at one of the stools at the counter .

"Good, because you are gonna need you energy for later." He said, plating up food for them and putting the plates in front of her. He walked around the counter and took the seat next to her. Taking one of her hands in his he leaned forward and said,

"Emily, I really want this to be something. I want to be there for you. I want to try and have a relationship with you. A real one." She smiled at him and replied,

"Spencer, do you want to go with me on a date tonight?" He laughed.

"Well, I do believe my schedule is clear." She laughed too and kissed him again.

.....Combined P.O.V....

This was all I need. I can believe that I am all you need because you are all I need. We can be extraordinary together instead of ordinary apart. You. Are. Enough.

A/N: Wow. That was the longest thing I have ever written in one sitting. I hope all of you love it! Thanks for all the reviews. There will be a sequel and please give me your feedback, good or bad a review helps the stories and ideas grow.

Btw, the second to last line was taken from an episode of Grey's Anatomy. So I just wanted to say that that is not mine, I do not own Grey's Anatomy.

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