Title: Swimming With the Tide
Author: Ann
Pairing: Prentiss/JJ
Fandom: Criminal Minds
Rating: PG-13
Series: 1) Drowning in Sensations
Disclaimer: Criminal Minds and its characters are the property of CBS. No infringement intended.
Note: Special thanks to the very generous stargazer1960 for the physics lesson and wonderful suggestion for incorporating the properties of light and the amazing atfm for fighting off horrid allergy symptoms to beta this one.
Summary: The morning after Drowning in Sensations - JJ's point of view. Hopefully there will be at least one more.

***

A single ray of light forced its way through the narrow space between the base of the taupe-colored blinds and the window sill, diffracting with purpose through the room. Its efforts to find a landing required agile refractions which were finally successful as it shone brightly on the metal toaster which stood in its path. The resulting reflection traveled a short distance away to highlight a small patch of distressed wood on the breakfast table but went unnoticed by the blonde who sat reading the morning paper, her focus on an article about a local abduction.

As the story began to unfold, horizontal lines of newspaper print blurred together, melding the words into dark, solid lines which stretched from one side of the page to the other. Jennifer Jareau squinted and then blinked several times in an attempt to separate the words from the jumbled bars of text, but her subconscious simply wouldn't allow her to distract herself from the one thought she'd spent most of the night obsessing over – she had kissed Emily.

The article already forgotten, JJ tossed the unread paper on the table and stared down at the pattern of sunlight that had slowly moved across her plate, spotlighting a half-eaten bagel which was now positioned almost directly in the center of the light. She smiled in memory of just two days prior when, in a small country café, Emily had reached across the table of the narrow booth and snatched up the homemade biscuit JJ had professed to be too full to eat as the conversation had continued in a smooth and flowing manner. Emily had never lost a beat; it had been as if stealing food from JJ's plate was an everyday occurrence, a move so natural and carefree, like so many of the exchanges the pair had shared over the past several months. And for that very reason, JJ hadn't hesitated at Emily's door last evening; she'd just turned toward the other woman and kissed her as if it was something she did all the time.

Raising a hand to her mouth, JJ traced a finger slowly across her lips, the same lips that had been pressed tightly against Emily's, but no matter how many times she changed the stroking motion or amount of pressure applied by her finger, she couldn't recreate the wonderful sensation of Emily's soft, full lips against her own. It was as if she'd come home, only to a home she'd never known before – one where she felt freely accepted, one where she felt safe, one she didn't want to ever leave again. And now that she'd experienced what she'd only dreamt of, JJ wasn't sure she could deny herself the pleasure of drinking in the sweetness that was Emily should the opportunity present itself again, but she knew that she'd have to reel in her desires and keep them hidden away; she'd placed any and all hope of further kisses in Emily's hands with her parting words that still resounded in her head: "Nothing has to come of this. It's up to you, Emily."

Hoping she hadn't made a terrible mistake by pressing Emily too soon, JJ tried to push the thought from her mind as she rose from her chair and reached for her breakfast plate, the sunlight transferring to her skin and outlining the fine bones in her hand. She stared down at her skin, an almost golden color in the natural light, as her thoughts shifted to a recent scene in a local emergency room as she and the rest of the team had waited for word on Garcia's condition after she'd been gunned down outside her apartment. Emily had eased her hand into JJ's and squeezed gently, the resulting effect immediate; it had calmed JJ, but at the same time, had sent her senses into overload, making her hyperaware of her surroundings and, especially, of the woman who sat quietly beside her. JJ had grabbed hold of the lifeline and had refused to let go, the physical connection seeming to ground both women.

Now, looking down at the same hand that had been held so lovingly by Emily, JJ couldn't help but wonder how it would feel if Emily were to interlace their fingers under different circumstances. One word immediately sprung into her head – bliss; pure, unadulterated bliss, and wanting desperately to experience such a state of utter joy and contentment, JJ came to the conclusion that giving in to her desire to kiss Emily had indeed been worth it after all. However, it was the potentially detrimental consequences of her action that frightened her at this moment.

Sighing, she removed her hand from the light and moved toward the sink, placing the dinnerware on the counter next to her empty coffee mug as she reached for the dishwashing liquid. Mindlessly, JJ turned on the tap and poured the blue liquid into the running water, watching as it made its transition into white, fluffy suds. She scooped up a handful of the newly formed foam and lifted it free from the water, slowly moving her thumb across the bubbles until each and every one had evaporated in the palm of her hand. JJ continued to look down at her now empty palm, marveling that there was no sign that the suds had ever been in her possession in the first place, save for the soapy residue that was left behind. She just hoped that her friendship with Emily didn't follow along the same lines and that it was strong enough to withstand her spontaneity should Emily not wish to pursue a more than friends type of relationship with her. For now, all she could do was go with the flow and swim along with the tide as she waited for Emily to make her decision.

Turning off the tap, JJ searched her mind one last time, suddenly realizing something she hadn't yet considered. What if Emily no longer wanted to have anything to do with her? What residue, if any, would be left behind from their friendship?

***

Next story in series - The Cornerstone.