Title: Divulging Secrets

By: Cathleen18

Pairing: Nick/Greg

Rating: PG

Summary: After the lab explosion, Nick has to face up to Greg about why he was so concerned and friendly all of a sudden.

 

***

Nick sat by Greg's side for hours, like he had done yesterday, and the day before that. In fact, Nick hadn't left Greg's side for more than an hour since Greg was wheeled in after the explosion at work. Nick didn't know why he had this sudden change of attitude towards Greg (he'd always thought of him as an immature child), but he knew that he couldn't let Greg out of sight again, for fear of losing him.

That's what Nick was scared of; losing Greg. Even Sara and Warrick knew that Nick was scared about losing Greg. When Nick had gone to Grissom to request two weeks off work for 'personal reasons', soon it became obvious to Grissom that Nick was scared.

Fear showed on Nick, like advertisements showed on the TV; it was always there. When Nick went home for his hours sleep; it was restless and he was fidgety. He had constant nightmares, even though they only lasted an hour, but they were enough to bring tears to his eyes, to scare him rigid, to cause him to tremble lightly, and make him want to get back to Greg's side.

Greg quietly questioned Nick's sudden change in opinion of him, but secretly, he loved the attention Nick showered on him. Nick made him stay in bed in the hospital, not letting him get up for anything, although the doctor had given him the all clear. Whatever Greg wanted, Nick got it for him, whether it was the magazine from the foot of his bed, or a coffee from the café by work. Nick didn't complain though; he was happy to do all these things. He just didn't want to lose Greg again.

The day of Greg's release from hospital, the day before Nick was due to return to work, Greg asked the question he'd been dying to ask from Nick's third visit to the hospital "Why are you doing all this for me?"

It took Nick all of three seconds to answer "Because I want to." Secretly adding "And because I don't want to lose you."

Greg hoped for a better answer than that, but it would do him for now. Nick was driving him home and, knowing how Nick had been for the last two weeks, was probably going to spend the rest of the day with him. He had plenty of time to find out the rest of his reasons.

"Ah, home sweet home," Greg declared when he walked into his apartment, Nick following pretty closely.

"Good to be home?" Nick asked sarcastically.

"You have no idea." Greg sighed and walked over to his answering machine. There were five messages. As he played each one, he sighed.

After the last message had been deleted, Nick asked, "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," Greg quickly answered, not wanting to get into it right then.

"OK. Right, I might go back to mine now you're home and safe. Bye Greg," Nick said, slowly backing away, hoping that Greg would reach out and stop him. As if Greg was reading his mind, he did just that.

"Nick, I don't want you to go anywhere. Want something to eat? Drink?" Greg asked, reluctantly letting go of Nick to walk to the kitchen.

"I'll have a drink thanks. I ate before I picked you up." Nick followed Greg into the kitchen and noticed how small it was. It had a microwave, an oven, a sink and one counter with a stool. That was it.

Studying Nick's face as his eyes looked over the room; Greg said quickly, "It's enough for me. I'm not exactly a great cook." He added at the end as a mood lifter. It seemed to work for the moment, but he quickly saw the strain of Nick's smile. "So what do you want to drink?" he asked, opening the tiny refrigerator.

"What have you got?" Nick said, leaning against the counter, watching as Greg leant over to look at the contents of his almost-bare fridge. He noticed the out-of-date milk, the out-of-date juice and the look of something he didn't even want to think about.

"Er…water?" Greg said, looking behind to Nick, with a sheepish look on his face.

"Come on. Let's go." Nick stood up and walked into the living area, grabbing his jacket off the armchair and pulling it on.

"Go where?" Greg asked, completely puzzled. He watched as Nick's shirt road up a little as he put his arms through his jacket. 'What I would give to be that jacket' he thought. The thoughts quickly dispersed when he saw Nick staring at him.

"The store. You need food and stuff, and I need to be outside in the fresh air. By the way, we're walking, so don't buy too much." Nick smirked and opened the door. He stood outside for five minutes before Greg finally joined him.

"It's about time. What did you do? Rearrange the furniture or something?" Another smirk appeared on Nick's mouth. This time Greg hit him. "Hey! No need to get violent."

"Watch it Mister, or I will tell your mommy on you." Greg stuck his tongue out to emphasise his point. Nick chuckled.

"Come on Einstein. Let's buy some food."

An hour and sixty dollars later, Nick and Greg were finally on their way back to Greg's with arms full of groceries.

"Greg, I thought I told you not to buy too much," Nick said, his words strained as he struggled to carry four bags in his arms.

"I didn't. I told you I had no food in the fridge or cupboards. You didn't exactly stop me though," Greg said back, trying to keep the bitterness out of his voice.

"I didn't realise how much you'd bought until you left the store."

They got to Greg's apartment and Greg took out his keys. Nick caught site of one of his angry scars and cursed inwardly at how red it still was. Greg felt Nick's eyes on him and turned around to meet Nick's sad gaze.

"What? They don't hurt too badly, honestly." Greg tried to reassure him, but knew that Nick didn't believe him. Nick had heard the gasp Greg let escape his lips as he bent down to put his bags on the floor.

"Greg? What's wrong? Are you OK?" Nick said kneeling down by Greg's side as Greg fell onto his knees.

"I'm fine. There was pain in my back. It's going now," Greg panted.

"Are you sure? I can run you to the hospital if it's really bad." Nick rested his hand on Greg's shoulder gently, causing tingles to run down Greg's spine. Greg let out an involuntary shudder. "Greg, I'm sorry. Did I hurt you?" Concern was evident in Nick's voice.

"No, no you didn't."

Nick took the keys out of Greg's hand and opened the door. He slipped an arm around Greg's shoulders and lifted him to his feet. They went into the apartment and Nick helped Greg to put the groceries into the cupboards.

"So, what do you want to drink this time?" Greg asked.

"Anything. I'm not picky."

"OK."

Twenty minutes later, Greg and Nick were sitting on Greg's sofa talking about the others at work.

"Come on Greg. We all know that you have a thing for both Catherine and Sara. It's written all over your face whenever they walk into a room you're in. You look all guilty and walk off." Nick was prying into dangerous territory so Greg shot Nick a death-glare. Nick put up his hands in surrender. "OK. OK. You don't want to talk about it. Jeez!"

"Nick, it's not the fact that I don't want to tell you. It's the fact that I can't."

"Why?" Nick pushed. Once again, Greg shot him another menacing glare. "OK. Fine, you can't tell me." Nick felt defeated so continued, "Greg, tell me about her. I know you can't, just tell me what you can."

"Fine. But I'm not telling you everything," he looked to Nick and noticed him waiting 'Here goes' he thought. "When I see this person, my heart skips a beat. I know it's a cliché term, but it's right in every way. I get butterflies. My temperature rises. I suddenly become aware of every fault in myself. And it hurts that I can't have this person." Greg looked down at his hands, which were now clutching his empty glass of nothing.

He'd just poured out to Nick how he felt about him, and Nick wouldn't know the difference.

'If Greg feels this way about her, I don't stand a chance.' Nick tried not to look defeated, but it was a struggle.

Realising that Greg was waiting for him to say something, he said the only thing that came to mind. "She's a very special lady. I hope she knows that."

'Why's he so sure it's a woman?' "I do too," Greg agreed.

Both looked serious for a moment. In the end, the awkwardness was too much for Greg and he stood up.

"I have to…er. I have to make dinner."

"Er…right. I'd better go home anyway. Bye Greg." This time Greg didn't stop him.

As he stepped into the kitchen, he heard his front door click shut. He let out a sigh and a tear rolled down his cheek. "I'm just being stupid," he said to himself, wiping the tear away.

Outside his door, Nick was sitting on the step. He had tears rolling down his face. He sniffed. "I'm just being stupid," he said, before stepping towards his Denali and getting in. "Greg doesn't love me. Who would?"

During shift the next night, Nick couldn't concentrate. This didn't go unnoticed by Sara.

When they went to the locker room after shift, ready to grab their coats and put their IDs away, Sara said suddenly, "You love him, don't you?"

"What?" Nick said, not registering what she was asking.

"Greg. You love Greg, don't you?"

Nick turned to face her and noticed the knowing look on her face. He sighed. "Yes. Yes I do." He turned back to his locker and took out his jacket. He slipped it on. Nick's mind flashed back to the day before. He smiled. "Yeah," he said finally realising.

"Then go get him!" she exclaimed, giving him an encouraging nudge and smiled. "You deserve happiness and Greg will make you happy."

"Thank you Sara," Nick said, hugging her and kissing her on the cheek.

"You're very welcome. Now go," she said, a mild warning to her tone.

An hour later, Nick was standing outside Greg's door. He'd showered and changed before coming here because he wanted this to be perfect.

He knocked.

"Greg, I know you're in there," he called when no one answered.

Greg sighed and slowly opened the door. He had tear stained cheeks and looked like he hadn't slept.

"Greg. Greg, what's wrong?" Nick stepped into the house and put a gentle hand on Greg's arm.

Not saying anything, Greg fell into Nick's arms and allowed Nick to steer him into the living area. They both sat down, with Greg lightly sobbing into Nick's shoulder and Nick softly stroking Greg's back, careful not to apply too much pressure to his healing wounds.

When the last of the sobs left Greg's body, he was able to say, "He's dead. She's dead. They're dead."

"Who Greg? Who's dead?" Nick pushed Greg away, making sure he still had him in his grasp and searched his eyes.

Greg's eyes were cold and filled with sadness and loss. Nick wanted nothing more than to take the pain away from Greg, although he had no idea what was going on.

"Greg?" Nick asked, once again. Greg looked up to meet his soft gaze.

"My godparents. They're dead." Tears choked up his throat again and Greg fell back into Nick's arms as fresh sobs erupted. Once they'd finished, he asked what he'd wanted to since he heard Nick's car pull up, "What are you doing here?" Greg wiped the tears away and looked up at Nick.

"I came to tell you something. But it can wait."

Nick didn't want to confuse Greg even more than he already was. He could wait. He'd wait forever for Greg if he had to.

Greg wasn't having any of it. "Tell me what?" Nick refused to meet Greg's gaze. "Nick?" Greg asked. His tone made Nick look up.

Now the moment was here, Nick was extremely nervous. He'd never done this before. He'd never given his heart away. He'd never said "I love you" to anyone and meant it except his parents.

Nick felt Greg take his hand. Nick smiled.

"I came to tell you that I love you." He sighed when he'd finished and waited for Greg's reaction. When Greg did react, it was a bit of a surprise.

Hearing those words made Greg happy; happier than he'd ever been. He leant over and placed his lips on Nick's. Nick responded instantly.

When they pulled apart, Greg said, "I love you too."

Nick pulled Greg to him and hugged him gently. "That's all I needed to hear."