Title: Look Where You Least Expect To Find It 2
By: Tiffany F
Pairing: Mac/Hortaio
Series: part of the Look Where You Least Expect To Find It series
Rating: PG
Summary: When Horatio went to New York chasing a murder suspect he found a life partner. This story follows their developing relationship. I don't own anything you know and am only playing around.

“Hey bitchwhore,” Danny said walking into the trace lab, “we need to talk.”
 
“I’m busy and Mac won’t like you talking to me like that,” Lisa said, not looking up.
 
“You know what, why don’t we ask him,” Danny said, grabbing her upper left arm. “Hey Adam, you think you can finish this? I need her for a special project for Mac.”
 
“Yeah, no problem,” Adam said, obviously puzzled.
 
Danny led Lisa through the lab to an old interrogation room where Stella and Flack were waiting. “Here she is,” he announced, forcing Lisa into the empty chair. “Here’s the bitch who decided to ruin our boss.”
 
“Good work, Danny,” Stella said, opening a folder. “Lisa Steinman aka Melissa Zimmerman. I can see why you changed it; all those sexual harassment suits you’ve filed really don’t look great on the old resume. I guess we need to start screening a little harder when someone new comes into our lab.”
 
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
 
“Oh I think you do,” Flack said, leaning over and putting his weight forward on his hands. “You planned to seduce one of the best men in this department, hell, this city and then file a formal complaint against him.” Flack slammed a fist against the table. “You were going to completely destroy my friend.”
 
“Not to mention the package you sent to Mac’s best friend and research partner in Miami,” Danny added. “Lieutenant Caine and Mac have been working on this project for over a year and you almost ruined it by sending that stupid petty assed package to Miami.”
 
Lisa shook her red hair back. “They’re not research partners,” she said. “They’re lovers.”
 
Both Flack and Danny snorted. “Please,” Danny finally said. “Where the hell did you get that idea from? Because I can tell you right now that Mac Taylor ain’t gay.”
 
“I found a coded email on Mac’s computer,” Lisa started.
 
“Oh, what’s that?” Flack asked. “Did I just hear a confession from that pretty poison mouth? We already knew you was on Mac’s computer; we planted that email for you to find.”
 
“Prints, hacker codes, pictures, eye witnesses,” Stella said. “They all put you where you shouldn’t be; in Mac’s office on his private computer.”
 
“How do you know he didn’t give me permission to be on there?” Lisa demanded.
 
Danny looked towards the mirrored window. “You know what, you can sit here and deny it all you want to, sweetheart, but why don’t we just ask Mac?”
********************
 
Mac looked over at Horatio. “Tell me I can do this.”
 
Horatio ran his hands up Mac’s arms and cradled his face in his hands. “You can do this, Mac,” he said softly. “I’m sorry my insecurities almost destroyed us. When we’re done here I’ll take you home and make it up to you.”
 
“I’m holding you to that.” He kissed Horatio gently before making his way to the door. “Don’t miss your big entrance.”
 
“Hey Mac,” Flack said as the dark-haired detective was closing the door. “Sorry to pull you back from Miami so sudden but this bitch here is making trouble.”
 
“I know,” Mac replied. “Danny called just as my plane landed. I’m impressed Stella, Danny, Don; at all the research and hard work you’ve done. I think I’ll have you start screening all new hires from here on out.”
 
Lisa stood up. “Mac, tell them what happened,” she exclaimed. “Tell them you gave me the okay to use the computer in your office.”
 
“I did no such thing,” Mac replied, his face hard. “No one, not even Stella, knows my passwords or has permission to access my computer at any time.”
 
“Why are you doing this to me, Mac?” Lisa asked.
 
“I haven’t done anything to you,” Mac replied. “You wanted money from the city and this was the only way you knew to obtain it. You chose a potential victim from the lab to target and it probably would have worked if you hadn’t gotten a stupid idea in your head and sent pictures to Miami.”
 
“Pictures that arrived the same day Mac did,” Horatio said quietly from the corner of the interrogation room. “It took us five minutes to realize there was something very wrong in his lab.”
 
“Our research has been sanctioned and funded by our cities,” Mac said. “And we’re about to publish our first paper.”
 
Lisa jumped up, knocking her chair over. “It’s a lie!” she yelled. “Look at their rings!”
 
“My wife died in the 9-11 attacks,” Mac said going a deadly cold. “How dare you drag her memory into this?”
 
Stella, who had known about Mac’s plans and seen the rings, looked closely at Mac’s left hand. He was wearing the same yellow gold band he’d worn for years.
 
“And my wife is at home in Miami,” Horatio said. “We can call her if need be but I’d rather not upset her if we can avoid it. Mac, I think we should end this now and let Detective Flack book our suspect.”
 
“I agree,” Mac said. “Don, I don’t want to see this piece of trash again until we have a court date.”
 
“My pleasure, Mac,” Don said. He cuffed Lisa and led her from the room.
 
Mac sighed and sat down at the table. “I meant it; good work both of you,” he said. “Come on, I’m buying dinner.”
********************
 
“Okay, I have a few questions,” Stella said, leaning back in her chair. They were in Mac’s apartment with an open pizza box on the coffee table. “Why were you wearing your wedding band and who the hell did you have lined up to play Horatio’s wife?”
 
Mac unhooked a silver chain from around his neck. The light glistened off the white gold band. “I knew that Lisa knew H and I are lovers,” he said. He slipped off his wedding ring, put it on the chain and refastened it before sliding his commitment ring on. “So I decided to wear Claire’s ring because everyone had seen it before.”
 
“So you couldn’t be caught in a lie,” Danny said. “That’s smart, Mac, but it had to hurt.”
 
“It did,” Mac said. “But I also know Claire would understand and love the joke behind it all. It was her kind of humor.”
 
Horatio kissed Mac’s temple gently. “As to my ‘wife’ I asked Calleigh if she would accept the phone call,” he said. “She’s a born actress and was ready to play the role if we called.”
 
“It all worked out okay then?” Danny asked. “Mac was pretty shaken when he called and asked for my help.”
 
“I have some issues in my past and the pictures and note played right to them,” Horatio said. “Luckily Mac is stubborn and got Calleigh on his side.”
 
“Yeah, after she slapped and tried to shoot me,” Mac said. “Don’t ever piss that woman off.”
 
“Did she hurt you?” Horatio asked.
 
“No where near what I knew you had to be feeling,” Mac replied. “My only concern was finding you and setting the record straight.”
 
“Well it’s lucky you guys have been researching that paper on the side,” Stella commented. “Otherwise we would have been SOL.”
 
Danny laughed. “And then some,” he said. “I called my friend in DC and he’s sending up some new encryption software and password scrambler for your computer, Mac. Ain’t no one gonna be able to do this again.”
 
“Thank you, Danny,” Mac said. “Remind me to send a letter thanking him as well.”
 
“Will do; his boss is a former marine and swears at, I mean by, this stuff,” Danny said. “It’ll all be ready when you come back to work on Monday.”
 
“And we’re going to get out of your way,” Stella said. “Thanks for supper, Mac, and congratulations; both of you.”
 
“What she said,” Danny added. “Whatever help you need, Mac, H; you know where to find me.”
 
Horatio smiled. “Thank you, Danny. Have a good night.”
 
Mac saw his friends to the door and locked it behind him. “I’ve been thinking, Horatio,” he said sinking into his favorite chair. “If Lisa was able to get into my office what’s to stop her getting into my apartment as well? This whole place could be bugged.”
 
“Do you think she’d go that far?”
 
“In a plan to ruin me and extort money she had to have video and audio proof,” Mac said. “There were no guarantees I’d go to her apartment so she had to have a plan B.”
 
Horatio nodded. “Then I suppose we need to do what we do best,” he said. “Do you have a spare flashlight?”
********************
 
The lovers spent the next two hours carefully searching Mac’s apartment and found spy cameras in every room. “We’ll have to have them printed to be sure,” Mac said, “but now I’m pissed. She could have been watching me for weeks; ever since we hired her.”
 
“I wonder where the feeds are sent to.” Horatio asked.
 
“My front closet,” Mac sighed. “I found a lap top there. Danny’s going to come pick all this up and take it all to the lab.”
 
“It’s good we have friends we can trust to be discrete,” Horatio said. “I wouldn’t mind seeing the footage from your bedroom.”
 
Mac groaned and sank onto the sofa. “If she has this saved on another source then our relationship could still come out,” he said. “What if she’s been doing a remote access download?”
 
“Then we’ll find it,” Horatio said, sitting down and pulling Mac into a hug. “We knew this could happen, Mac. We knew going in that our relationship could come out at any time. We’re ready and can deal.”
 
“You haven’t stayed over since she was hired,” Mac said. “And I suppose we can say she manipulated the feeds from our nightly phone calls.”
 
“And its illegally obtained information,” Horatio said. “Mac, I’m supposed to be the insecure one and you’re the strong one.”
 
That got a laugh. “You’re the strongest man I know, Horatio,” he said. “You take care of everyone no matter how much it could hurt you.”
 
“Speaking of, I had to tell Yelina the truth about Madison,” Horatio said. “It was right before your case and this whole mess.” He rested his head against Mac’s shoulder. “I have never seen so much anger before and it was all directed at me.”
 
“What happened?” Mac ran his fingers through his lover’s soft red hair.
 
“Madison has cancer,” Horatio said. “And needed a bone marrow transplant. The hospital said a sibling would be the best match but Yelina refused to believe me when I told her the truth. She didn’t want Ray Jr. tested.”
 
“How could she do something like that?” Mac asked.
 
“I’m not sure but she came around in the end and Ray Jr. was a match,” Horatio said. “I just felt so helpless, Mac. My princess has been through so much and it was still just being piled on.”
 
“You did what you could,” Mac said. “And if I know you, you had yourself tested for the transfusion and are paying the medical bills; exactly what I would do if I was in your place.”
 
“Fortunately I owned some land that was of interest to developers,” Horatio said. “I was going to give it to Ray Jr. when he turned 18 but no one else knew about that.”
 
“Let me know what I can do to help,” Mac said. “You don’t have to carry this burden alone any more; Horatio; Suzie and Madison are my family too.”
 
Horatio moved and claimed his lover’s mouth in a soft but passionate kiss. “Thank you, Mac,” he whispered against his lover’s lips a minute later. “I love you so much.”
 
“I love you too,” Mac said. He groaned when the doorbell rang. “Hold that thought, that’s Danny.”
 
“You called, Mac?” Danny asked, looking around. “That bitchwhore do something else to you?”
 
Horatio snorted and looked like he was trying not to laugh. Mac just rolled his eyes. “Yeah, Danny, it looks like Lisa broke in here too,” Mac said. “Horatio and I found prints, cameras and a computer. See what you can do with them and get a warrant for Lisa’s apartment. I want her to go away for a long time.”
 
“You got it, Mac,” Danny said. “You got pictures for me too?”
 
“Memory card in an evidence envelope,” Mac said. “Give me a call and let me know what you find.”
 
Danny picked up the box. “As soon as I can,” he said. “And don’t worry, ain’t no one else will see any of this. It stays between us.”
 
“We owe you, Danny,” Horatio said.
 
“Buy me a beer and call it good. I’ll see you later.”
 
“He’s a good kid,” Horatio commented as Mac rejoined him after relocking the front door. “Danny reminds me so much of Speed it hurts.”
 
“I know, H,” Mac said. He pushed his lover back so the red head was spread out on the sofa. He straddled Horatio’s lean hips and leaned down to kiss him. “So I think you said something about making up to me?”
 
“I was thinking about a bed being involved at some point,” Horatio said. “There’s more room to move around.”
 
“You do realize that this is technically our honeymoon,” Mac said, standing up. He held out a hand to his lover.
 
Horatio took it with a smile and pulled Mac in against him once they were both on their feet. “Then I’d better make it a night to remember,” he purred, kissing Mac possessively.

“Why would anyone do that?” Danny muttered to himself. “There’s no way that can feel good.” He was embarrassed as hell to be watching the spy videos from his boss’ apartment but they had to know what she had possibly seen.
 
“I got your warrant, Danny,” Flack said. “We going or what? Whoa!”
 
“Flack!” Danny shut the lap top quickly. “Make some noise when you walk or something; Mac don’t want anyone else to see this.”
 
“Chill, Dano, I ain’t telling nobody,” Flack said. “So why don’t you shut it down and we’ll go check out the apartment.”
 
Danny was quiet until they were in the car. He was still trying to wrap his mind around what he had seen on the videos. Mac Taylor was highly professional, reserved and in control at all times. But watching those videos Danny had seen another side of his boss. Mac had been sprawled out on his bed, cell phone near his head and some kind of toy in his ass as he jerked off.
 
“You never tried it?” Don asked breaking into Danny’s thoughts.
 
“Tried what?”
 
“Stimulating your prostate during sex,” Flack said.
 
“Hey, ain’t no one getting near my ass,” Danny replied.
 
“Your loss, Messer, but you don’t know what you’re missing.”
 
“That an offer Flack?”
 
Don smiled. “If you want it to be, Danny boy,” he said. “If you want it to be.”
********************
 
Clothing littered the hallway leading towards the back bedroom. Outlined on the bed were two men, the shorter of the two on his back, hands tangled in his lover’s red hair. He moaned as his lover bit down on his left nipple. “Horatio,” Mac groaned his back arching. “Are you planning on doing anything other than tormenting me tonight?”
 
“Do you really want this over so fast, Mac?” Horatio whispered, licking Mac’s belly button. “I could take you now but I want you screaming for me.”
 
“Am I going to be able to walk tomorrow?” Mac bit back a scream as his lover slowly took his cock in his mouth.
 
Horatio drew back slowly, applying suction and humming at the same time. He looked up towards Mac’s face, eyes meeting as he wrapped his tongue slowly around the head of Mac’s erection. Mac’s free hand searched the bed almost frantically or the lube he knew was next to him. When he found it he pushed it towards Horatio in a silent plea. The red head sat up and slowly slicked two fingers on his right hand. “Hold on for me, Mac,” he said, grinning wickedly. “I don’t want you to come until I’m in you.”
 
“Then you might want to hurry,” Mac gasped, his words turning to a moan as he felt the slick fingers enter him. “Feels so good, Horatio.”
 
“You must like that present I got you,” Horatio said, adding a third finger. “You’re looser than you’ve been in the past.”
 
“Almost every night if I’m not too tired,” Mac said. “It helps me sleep.”
 
“Good, you need your sleep.” Horatio gently pulled his fingers out and slicked the lube over his erection. “You ready?”
 
“I was ready half an hour ago,” Mac said.
 
“Roll up on your side,” Horatio said, moving behind his lover. “One leg slightly forward for balance.” He slid home with a deep moan. “I love the feel of you around me, Mac.”
 
Mac twisted his head around and kissed Horatio as he pushed back against his lover to try and get the point across. Horatio wrapped an arm around Mac’s chest, a finger stroking over his sensitive nipples, as he pulled back and thrust forward again. He set a slow pace so he wouldn’t hurt his lover; Mac didn’t bottom often when they were together and Horatio was always careful.
 
“I’m not going to break, H,” Mac groaned, his hips thrusting back against his lover. “I want to feel you explode in me.”
 
“Only if you come with me,” Horatio whispered. “Stroke yourself, Mac.” The red head took Mac’s nipple between his forefinger and thumb, rolling and pinching it. He started thrusting faster, trying to match Mac’s hand on his own cock. Horatio bit down on his lover’s shoulder as his climax hit. Mac kept stroking and came when Horatio’s nail scraped over his nipple.
 
“That was amazing.” Mac turned and kissed Horatio softly. “Stay in me until we fall asleep?”
 
“I love it here, Mac,” Horatio murmured, pulling his lover back in tight against his body. “I love you.”
 
“Hmmm, I love you too,” Mac purred. “Round two when we wake up?”
 
“That’s a promise.”
********************
 
Danny had no clue when his life ventured into the weird zone but having his best *male* friend hit on him was not an every day occurrence. He managed to put the matter out of his mind while he and Flack searched Lisa’s apartment but it came back the minute Flack sealed the door.
 
“It looks like Mac is safe,” Don commented. “I think maybe we got everything.”
 
“Yeah but there’s no way to show she manipulated these videos,” Danny said. “Face it Don, we got tons of videos of my boss with a dildo in his ass. Mac’s screwed.” He glanced over at the muffled snort. “Get your mind outta the gutter, I didn’t mean it like that and you know it.”
 
“So, do you think Horatio tops?” Flack asked, closing his car door.
 
“You know what, I don’t even want to speculate about it because not only is Mac my boss he’s my friend and I’ve already messed up, letting you see that video,” Danny said. “I’ve never even thought about two men together.”
 
“You were tonight,” Flack said. “I heard what you was saying while watching the videos. Admit it; they turned you on, didn’t they?”
 
“Okay, you know what Flack, this conversation is over with,” Danny said. “Done. Never to be brought up again, especially if Mac’s around.”
 
Flack drove in silence for a moment. “One thing, Danny,” he finally said.
 
“What’s that?”
 
“Do some research and see what you’re missing.”
 
“Fine,” Danny said. “We done?”
 
“Yep, we’re done.”
********************
 
The ringing of Mac’s cell phone woke both men, years of habit and conditioning taking over. “Detective Taylor,” Mac said, instantly alert. “I’ll be right there.”
 
“Case?” Horatio asked.
 
“We’ve been working short since I fired Aiden,” Mac said, climbing out of bed. “I had to go on call even though this is technically vacation.”
 
Horatio stretched and watched as his lover got dressed. “I need to buy you a new shirt anyway,” he said. “To replace the one I destroyed last night.”
 
Mac laughed and sat down on the bed to tie his shoes. “I love it when you get so out of control,” he said. He leaned over and kissed Horatio, tongue snaking into his lover’s mouth. “I’ll be home as soon as I can.”
 
“Where’s your crime scene?”
 
“At the zoo,” Mac replied. “A tiger mauled someone.”
********************
 
Danny worked on processing the scene while the new girl flirted with the boss. It was all Danny could do not to laugh; even he could see Mac’s commitment ring through the gloves he was wearing and yet Montana seemed not to notice.
 
As Mac started up the extension ladder Danny caught a flash of red in the crowd and grinned. Now things would really get interesting.
 
“Excuse me, sir,” Lindsey’s voice said loudly, “you can’t be here. This is an active crime scene.”
 
Danny rolled his eyes. The new girl really did overlook the obvious. “Hey Horatio,” he said. “Mac just went up top for a minute, should be back any time now.”
 
“Thank you, Danny,” Horatio replied with a smile. He took off his sunglasses and looked around with a practiced eye. “Accident or murder?”
 
“Now wait a minute, you can’t just come in here and ask questions about an active scene,” Lindsey protested. “Sir, I need you to leave. How did you get in here anyway?”
 
“I signed the log and came under the tape,” Horatio replied calmly.
 
“And to answer your question, H, it’s murder,” Mac said, joining the group. “We’ve got a body dump.”
 
Horatio put his sunglasses back on and walked off the scene with Mac. “Original.” His voice drifted back. “Like they use the glades at home.”
 
Danny went over to a shell-shocked Lindsey. “That was Lieutenant Horatio Caine, Miami-Dade CSI day shift supervisor and bomb expert,” he said softly. “And Mac’s research partner. They have access to scenes in both towns.”
 
“How badly did I just screw up?”
 
“You were protecting your scene and they both knew it,” Danny said. “But in the future you might want to look at people and what they’re wearing. Also how we react; it should have been obvious that I knew Horatio and I wasn’t objecting to his presence in the scene. I may tease and test you, Montana, but I take my job serious. Ain’t no one gonna be in my scene who don’t belong there. And Horatio had his badge on his belt and always stands like that.”
 
“Like what?”
 
“Oh boy, we really gotta work with you,” Danny said. “He plants his feet, hands on hips and his jacket pushed back to show his badge. I know you wouldn’t be here if you can’t do the job but don’t get so hung up on details that you miss the big picture.”
********************
 
“So what are you doing here, other than giving my new investigator a heart attack?” Mac asked as he packed his evidence and kit away.
 
“Mainly staring at your ass in those tight suit pants and imagining my cock buried in it again,” Horatio said softly as his lover turned red. “But also to give you the new shirt.”
 
“Emerald,” Mac said, peaking into the bag. “It’s not a color I would have considered for myself.”
 
Horatio leaned in a little and lowered his voice. “It’ll bring out the green in your amazing eyes,” he said. “You’ll be beating them off with a stick once you put it on.” He straightened up. “Hurry home, Mac, I’ll keep the bed warm for you.”

“I gotta be crazy,” Danny muttered, pacing back and forth past his coffee table where a bag was sitting. “I just wish I could figure out what the hell is wrong with me so I could fix it. Watching all those evidence tapes, seeing Mac like that, it’s all messed up in my head. So my boss likes phone sec, ain’t no crime in that and his partner lives in another state. What did I think they did; get together for hand jobs, a little stress relief every two weeks? No, that’s the problem, I didn’t think about it because I didn’t care and now I can’t get it outta my mind.”
 
“Talking to yourself is the first sign of insanity, Danny boy.”
 
Danny yelped and spun around. “Flack, how the hell did you get in here?”
 
“You’re door was open,” Don said, leaning against a wall. “If you’re gonna lecture yourself it might be a good idea to lock it next time.”
 
“What are you doing here?”
 
“I thought we might go shoot some hoops but it sounds to me like you’ve got other stuff on your mind. You want to talk about it, Danny?”
 
“I don’t know, I feel like I’m going crazy, Donnie,” Danny said, starting to pace again. “I’ve got this idea in my head and it’s not going away and it keeps bugging me whenever I have free time or I’m not thinking about a case.”
 
“You’re wondering what it’s like to sleep with a guy,” Flack said softly.
 
“I’m wondering why the hell Mac seems to like it so much,” Danny said. “It just don’t look like it would feel good.”
 
“Okay, first time a guy’s ass is opened like that it hurts,” he said. “But with time and care the first time can be good for both partners. And over time the muscles do relax so it don’t hurt as much but there’s always a stretch and burn no matter what.”
 
“So why would anyone go through all that?” Danny asked.
 
“Because it’s intense, Danny; probably more pleasure than you’ve felt before,” Don replied.
 
“Why am I so wigged out about this, Donnie? Why’s it bugging me so bad?”
 
“You’re a scientist, Danny,” Flack said. “You’re curious by nature and you’ve had to review evidence of a very personal nature to your boss and friend. It’s probably gonna take time to settle down again.”
 
Danny paused and looked over at his friend. “Did you mean what you said the other day, Flack?”
 
“In the car, yeah. You gonna take me up on it?”
 
“I need to know,” Danny said, taking a deep breath.
 
Flack grinned and pushed off the wall. “You’re calling the shots here, Danny boy,” he said. “You want to stop, say the word and we’re done. No hard feeling neither; I ain’t messing up our friendship over this.” He pulled Danny in against his firm body and leaned down, claiming the other man’s mouth in a soft kiss. “Glasses,” he whispered a minute later.
 
Danny pulled back just enough to pull his glasses off and toss them onto the coffee table before leaning in to kiss his friend again.
********************
 
Mac opened his stir fry and sighed. “I didn’t think training newbies was supposed to wear you out,” he said, flopping onto the sofa next to his lover. “She’s smart and she’s going to fit in but she seems to have a bit of a hero complex going on.”
 
“Keep her with Danny long enough and she’ll snap out of it,” Horatio grinned. “He knows his job and has the right sense of humor to ease the tension in most situations.”
 
“And maybe something will come of it,” Mac said. “There’s the fine line after all.”
 
Horatio used his chop sticks to snag a mushroom from Mac’s box. “They didn’t seem that bad, actually,” he said. “I know Danny was talking with her when we left.”
 
“When she first got on scene Danny told her to be calm because, and I quote, he can sense when you’re nervous and will react to it, unquote,” Mac said, smiling. “She thought he meant the tiger. And then Danny told her to call me sir.”
 
“Which you hate,” Horatio laughed. “If Danny had been born after Speed died I would say that he had Speed’s soul. They are so much alike.”
 
“No, you can’t have him,” Mac said. He turned on the TV to a local news station. “Do you mind? I need to find out what else has happened today.”
 
“No, I know how crazy this place is,” Horatio sighed.
 
“So says the man who slipped on the meringue of a chocolate cream pie at a crime scene in his home town,” Mac said, trying not to laugh. “And almost hit the alligator as he fell.”
 
“It was a waste of a good pie, too,” Horatio said, grinning. “You know, Mac, I could get used to this really fast.”
 
“What’s that?”
 
Horatio kissed Mac’s neck gently. “Coming home to you every night,” he said. He paused. “Did you hear that?”
 
“No.”
 
“I’ll be right back.” Horatio put his food on the table and went to the front door. He thought he’d heard a knock but it had been so faint that he wasn’t sure. He opened the door and found Danny standing there. “Danny, is everything all right?”
 
“I think I messed up,” Danny replied. “Is Mac here?”
 
“Right here, Danny; what’s wrong?”
 
“Can I talk to you for a minute?” Danny asked.
 
“Sure, come on in,” Mac said. “Do you want some supper?”
 
“No, thank you,” Danny said. “Mac I think I messed up big time and I don’t know how to fix it.”
 
Horatio picked up his food. “I’ll be in the bedroom, Mac,” he said, kissing his lover quickly.
 
“No, Horatio, please stay,” Danny said. “This kinda concerns you too.”
 
“Start at the beginning,” Mac said.
 
“The beginning,” Danny snorted. “That would be when I was reviewing those tapes from your apartment to make sure there was nothing on there that could ruin your career. Flack overheard me muttering to myself and basically propositioned me in the car. I blew him off and told him we weren’t talking about it.”
 
“About what, Danny?” Horatio asked softly.
 
“I was wondering why a guy would enjoy….that,” Danny said, flushing. “You know what I mean, Mac.”
 
“Being penetrated,” Mac replied. “Not everyone does, Danny. Horatio and I were together for a while before I was able to trust him enough to let him in my body.”
 
“It just don’t look like something enjoyable,” Danny said. “That’s what Flack heard me muttering about. He dropped it after telling me to do some research to find out what I was missing and we ain’t talked about it since. Until he showed up at my apartment after work.”
 
“Danny,” Horatio said, “do Mac and I need to have a talk with Detective Flack? And do you need to go to the hospital?”
 
“No!” Danny exclaimed. “No, he didn’t do nothing bad. We was just kissing and stuff because I am curious and he offered and all that. But when he went to touch me I freaked and asked him to stop. He’d said he wouldn’t let it affect our friendship but he was acting all weird and shit after that.”
 
Mac glanced back at his lover. “Do you want to talk with Flack and I’ll visit with Danny?”
 
“Sure,” Horatio said. “I promise I won’t hurt him, Danny; unless he hurt you.”
 
Danny looked up at the red head. “I ain’t Speed, Lieutenant,” he said. “I don’t need protection.”
 
“I’ll be back, Mac.” Horatio kissed the top of Mac’s head and left the apartment quickly, slipping his sunglasses on.
 
“That wasn’t nice, Danny,” Mac said as he watched the door close behind his lover.
 
“What? It’s true,” Danny replied.
 
“I want you to think about what you just said to the man who is trying to help you figure out what’s going on in your life when he doesn’t have to,” Mac said. “And why he ran out of here so fast.” He picked up his stir fry and took a bite. “Horatio Caine is a man who cares for his friends as if they were his blood family and you are part of that. He knew long ago he’d never have children of his own and accepted that and has opened his heart to others, no matter how much it might hurt him personally. He sees you as a son, Danny, and you may have just damaged that relationship forever.”

 

“Does it hurt, Mac?” Danny asked after a few minutes of an uncomfortable silence.
 
“What, Danny?”
 
“When Horatio, you know.”
 
Mac sighed. “Danny, if you’re serious about this then you need to learn the terminology,” he said. “No, it doesn’t hurt when Horatio makes love to me.”
 
“What about the first time?”
 
Mac smiled as his mind went back to the first time he’d felt his lover inside him.

***FLASHBACK***
 
When the alarm went off an hour early Mac was confused. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d slept so long or so soundly. Then he became aware of a warm body curled up around him and the events of the night came flashing back. Mac grinned and rolled over to find Horatio was awake. “Morning.”
 
“Good morning,” Horatio replied.
 
“I meant what I said last night, H,” Mac said. “I’d like for you to take me.”
 
“If you’re positive,” Horatio said, staring into Mac’s eyes. “It’s going to hurt even if I’m careful and take my time.”
 
Mac kissed Horatio gently. “I’m sure and we’ll have to stop at the store on our way home tonight.” 
 
Horatio smiled and rolled them so he was on top and leaned down to kiss his new lover, his tongue teasing Mac’s lips until they opened for him and he was able to taste his lover. As their tongues teased and danced Horatio thought about the best way to prepare and eventually take Mac.
 
“You have a choice of positions,” he whispered as he was kissing a soft trail down Mac’s long neck. “On your side or your hands and knees.”
 
“What about on my back?”
 
“Not for your first time,” Horatio replied. “It’ll be too painful.”
 
“I want to be able to kiss you.”
 
“Side then.” Horatio licked Mac’s nipple, smiling at the arch his body gave in response. “So sensitive and so perfect.”
 
Mac gasped as his lover started sucking on the nipple so close to his scar. “It’s never been like this before.”
 
“It’s good because I can distract you,” Horatio purred, kissing has way to the other one. “Can you see the oil?”
 
“Bedside table your side,” Mac gasped.
 
Horatio grabbed the bottle and smiled down at his lover. “Trust me, Mac?”
 
“With everything I have,” Mac replied, feeling a flash of warmth through his body at the smile his words earned.
 
“Then here we go.” Horatio leaned over and licked the head of Mac’s erection, teasing it with his tongue before taking just the head in his mouth and started sucking gently. While his lover was distracted he coated a finger with oil and rubbed against Mac’s hole, teasing the muscles until they relaxed and he was able to slip inside his lover.
 
“Horatio,” Mac moaned, his legs opening to give his lover better access. He reached down and tangled his hands in his lover’s vibrant red hair.
 
“You taste so good, Mac,” Horatio said, licking up the length of Mac’s cock. “How are you doing?”
 
“It doesn’t hurt.”
 
“I’m going to start stretching you but I want you to promise me you’ll tell me if it’s something you can’t handle. I don’t want to hurt you, Mac.”
 
“I will,” Mac said, biting back another moan as Horatio went back to sucking on his cock. When he felt the two fingers press against and then into him, Mac’s breath caught for a moment. The stretch didn’t necessarily hurt but it was by no means comfortable. Horatio must have known because he kept his hand completely still while he took Mac’s erection into his mouth and sucked hard.
 
Horatio knew that he’d have to get his lover to climax to truly relax enough that the pain would be minimal. As he felt Mac’s body relaxing, Horatio began to move his fingers, both stroking and stretching. He also pulled back to be able to suck just on the head of Mac’s erection.
 
A little more oil, some humming and a pinch to Mac’s left nipple left the man sprawled on his bed, relaxed with three fingers in his ass. “How you doing, Mac?” Horatio asked.
 
“Like I could stay here all day and be happy,” Mac replied. His hips jerked and he gasped. “What was that?”
 
“That’s what’s going to let you come again once I’m buried inside you,” Horatio said. “Roll on your right side for me, Mac.”
 
Horatio opened their last condom and rolled it on, slicking it with oil. “I’m going to go slow, Mac,” he whispered, moving in behind his lover. “Tell me if you want me to stop.”
 
Mac’s breath caught as Horatio’s cock pushed onto him. He took several deep breaths and tried to relax. Horatio still and waited, his hands rubbing Mac’s stomach and abdomen until he felt his lover’s body relax and he pressed forward again, pulling Mac back against him.
 
“Too much?” he whispered.
 
“Intense,” Mac replied, panting.
 
“I won’t move until you’re ready,” Horatio said, his fingers toying with Mac’s sensitive nipples. “If you turn your head towards the ceiling I can kiss you.”
 
Mac moaned as he felt Horatio’s lips against his own. The voice in the back of his head was amazed that in less than twenty-four hours he’d gone from not even imagining to craving another man. He felt like an addict and, as Horatio’s tongue swept through his mouth, Mac felt his hips move.
 
That was the signal Horatio had been waiting for. He pulled back slowly and thrust forward, setting a slow pace and shifting his angle a few times until Mac cried out and started to get hard again. Horatio moved a hand down and took Mac’s cock in one hand, stroking it as he thrust into his lover.
 
“You gonna come for me again, Mac?” Horatio whispered. “I can feel the tension in your body and know you’re close. Come on, Mac; come for me.”
 
Mac’s body froze as his second climax of the morning hit him, this one twice as powerful as anything he’d ever felt before. He was distantly aware of Horatio’s climax and felt the kisses being pressed to his neck.

***END FLASHBACK***
 
“Hey Mac,” Danny said, shaking his boss’ shoulder. “You okay?”
 
“Yeah, Danny,” Mac replied. “What was it you wanted to know?”
 
“Did your first time hurt?” Danny asked. “And how did you know you wanted to have sex with another guy?”
 
“Yes it did,” Mac said. “But H was so slow and careful that I was able to deal with it. As to the other part of your question both Horatio and I felt an immediate connection and attraction the first time we met.”
 
“When was your first time?”
 
“What’s with the twenty questions, Danny?” Mac asked. “I don’t mind but it’s out of character for you.”
 
Danny looked down at his feet. “I’m just trying to get all this right in my mind,” he said. “I want to know why I want to know.”
 
“You saw me not an hour after Horatio took me the first time,” Mac said. “When you and Speed were working on that thumb print.”
 
“But that wasn’t even a day after you met,” Danny exclaimed, his eyes wide in shock.
 
“You can think what you will of me, Danny,” Mac said. “But neither Horatio nor I have every regretted a minute we’ve been together. Now why don’t you tell me about this attraction to Flack you’ve developed.”
 
“I don’t know, Mac, it’s like reviewing those tapes did something to me,” Danny said, flopping back on the sofa with a groan. “I just can’t get the idea out of my mind and it’s driving me nuts. Flack noticed and offered to show me what I was missing and I thought I could handle it but I just couldn’t so I said stop.”
 
“I’ll have to see what Flack tells Horatio but it sounds like you were both looking for something different and don’t know how to deal with it,” Mac sighed. He looked up when he heard a key in the lock. “That can’t be Horatio already.”
 
Horatio hung up his coat and perched next to Mac. “He wasn’t home so I can only suggest leaving a message on his voice mail,” he said. “I’m going to bed, Mac.”
 
“Okay, H,” Mac said. He pulled his lover’s head down and kissed his gently. “I love you.”
 
“I know,” Horatio said. “I love you too.” He stood and went down the hall without a glance towards the sofa.
 
“I can’t order you to apologize, Danny,” Mac sighed. “But it might be a good idea to try and talk with Horatio before he leaves tomorrow afternoon.”

 

“Are you gonna take sides, Mac?” Danny asked.
 
“Danny, I’m not going to let my personal life interfere with my professional life but you hurt my partner deeply and he was trying to help you,” Mac replied. “I think you should go home and sleep on your choices today and what you’ve said to Horatio.”
 
“What about Flack?”
 
“That’s up to you, Danny,” Mac said. “I’ll talk with him if you want me to but I seriously think you two should talk this out. Be honest with him and insist that he’s honest with you. He’s a good man and I think he’d be good for you. You just need to decide what you want.”
 
Danny swallowed hard and looked down at his feet again. “Why do I feel so helpless here, Mac?”
 
“Because you’re making a life changing choice, Danny,” Mac said. “You’ll have to hide a lot of stuff from your friends and family if you do choose to be in a relationship with Flack. I can’t tell you what to do in this, Danny. I can only advise.”
 
“Okay, thanks Mac; I think I’m gonna go walk for a bit before I head home.”
 
“Will you consider talking with Horatio tomorrow before he leaves?” Mac asked.
 
“If you want me to, but I’m still not sure what I have to apologize for.”
 
Mac sighed and rubbed his eyes. “Good night, Danny.”
 
Horatio was curled up under the blankets in the dark when Mac finally joined him. Mac wasn’t sure what else he could do to make Danny understand how much his words had hurt Horatio as the younger man just didn’t seem to care. He stripped and spooned up behind his lover, one arm draped over Horatio’s waist.
 
“I’m not asleep, Mac,” Horatio said softly.
 
“Now where have I heard those words before?” Mac asked, smiling.
 
“Have you ever thought about what our lives would be like if you had gone back to your room that night?”
 
“I’d still be the broken and grieving husband who would probably lost most of his team to bitterness,” Mac said. “And I doubt you’d still be alive.”
 
“Losing Speed as I did, if you hadn’t been there, I might well have killed myself,” Horatio agreed. “No one on my team would have understood why it hurts so much.”
 
Mac kissed Horatio’s neck gently. “It might help to tell them the truth,” he said. “Or at least let Calleigh know. She seems to have stepped up to help and protect you.”
 
“She never did mention slapping you.”
 
“As far as Calleigh was concerned at that point I had hurt you and didn’t belong in your lab. I’m just lucky I’m faster than she is; otherwise she might have shot me too.”
 
“The same thing I’m sure Stella would do to me if I ever hurt you,” Horatio said. “Bottom line, Mac; I’m really glad you didn’t go back to your bed alone that night.”
 
“So am I and, as I told Danny tonight, we’ve never regretted a moment we’ve been together.”
 
Horatio sighed deeply. “Did you also tell him I know he’s not Speed and was only trying to help him?”
 
“And then some,” Mac said. He pulled back and rolled his lover until he could look into Horatio’s eyes. “I told him you considered him family and how you’ll do anything for those you love but I don’t think I got through to him.”
 
“Don’t worry about it, Mac,” Horatio said. “Either he’ll come around or he won’t and we can’t force him.”
 
“I just hate that he’s hurt you.”
 
“I’ll survive,” Horatio said. “Make love to me, Mac?”
 
Mac smiled gently. “My pleasure,” he whispered, bending down to kiss his lover.
********************
 
Danny walked to the nearest subway station and made his way slowly back to his apartment. He still wasn’t sure exactly what had happened while he was talking with Mac and Horatio but something inside him had just snapped. Seeing the compassion in those deep blue eyes had been too much and he’d lashed out, trying to distance himself again. Danny hadn’t spent much time around Horatio and Mac when they were in private and, after seeing the videos and knowing exactly how Mac looked when he was aroused, made Danny more than a little uncomfortable around his boss and Mac’s lover.
 
As to his own problem he wanted to know what it felt like to be with another guy, sure, but did he really want a long term relationship? Danny had been feeling an attraction to Lindsey since she first walked onto the crime scene and he was half tempted to just tell Don to forget about it and go back to chasing women. But the question came to the front of his mind again; why did Mac seem to like being penetrated so much?
 
God it was so screwed up in his mind. Why should Danny care what his boss liked or didn’t like away from work. Why couldn’t he get the images and questions out of his mind long enough to make some conscious decisions about his own life? And why the hell was he just standing on the stairs to his apartment building like a lunatic as it started to rain.
 
Shaking his head Danny made his way inside and froze at the sight of Don Flack sitting in front of his door. “Don?”
 
“Hey Danny,” Flack said, standing up. “Look, I’m sorry I freaked on you like I did earlier and I was hoping we could talk.”
 
“Yeah, come on in, Donnie,” Danny said. “Why didn’t you call? I woulda come home.”
 
“I figured you was out thinking things over and I had to make some decisions too,” Flack said. “Look, Danny boy, I was serious ‘bout one thing. I don’t want our friendship messed up over this. We’ve been friends for too long for that to happen. But I’d also like to explore this other side of the relationship if you want to too. We go at your pace and I promise not to freak on you again.”
 
Danny shook his head as he sank down onto his sofa. “I’m just feeling so screwed up over all this, Don,” he said. “It’s like I want to and then I don’t and then I do and I just don’t know when I’m gonna feel like what and I don’t know if that’s fair to you.”
 
“I know what you’re going through, Danny,” Don said, sitting down and pulling his friend into a hug. “And I can help you with it if you’ll open up enough to let me in.”

“Hey Stella, have you seen Mac?” Danny asked, catching up to his friend in the hall.
 
“Yeah, I think he went down to the locker room for a minute,” she replied. “Is everything okay, Danny?”
 
“No, but it ain’t what you’re thinking,” he said. “Thanks.”
 
The locker room was empty and Danny was about to leave when he heard a faint gasp come from behind the screen they’d installed for the women to change behind. Curiosity was a trait inherent in a CSI so Danny quietly made his way across the room and peaked around the partition.
 
Horatio was leaning against a wall, his pants down around his ankles, Mac on his knees in front of his lover sucking on Horatio’s very erect cock. The red head’s hands were tangled in Mac’s hair and his was biting his lip to keep quiet. Danny was rooted to the floor even though he knew he should leave. His eyes widened as his boss took more and more of Horatio’s erection into his mouth until his nose was pressed up against Horatio’s groin. Horatio’s head fell back against the wall as he groaned deep in his throat.
 
Mac pulled back and looked up at his lover with a smile. “Like this H?” he whispered.
 
“I want to come with you in me,” Horatio replied, staring down at his lover.
 
Horatio pulled Mac to his feet and claimed his mouth in a deep kiss while he undid Mac’s pants and pushed them down. It was Mac who broke off the kiss and spun Horatio around and started to prepare him swiftly.
 
“Now, Mac,” Horatio moaned. “Now, please.”
 
“I don’t want you to be uncomfortable on the plane home,” Mac said, pushing forward slowly.
 
“I want to be able to feel you for the next two weeks,” Horatio replied. “I want to remember every minute we’ve spent together up here.”
 
“I love you,” Mac whispered against Horatio’s neck. “I love you so much.”
 
“Move, Mac, please,” Horatio said, pushing back against his lover. He turned his head and leaned back. Mac took the hint and leaned in to kiss his partner as his pulled back and thrust forward again, setting a steady rhythm. As much as Mac didn’t want to hurt Horatio he knew that there was a good chance that someone could walk in at any time and catch them.
 
Danny couldn’t believe that he was watching his boss have sex. As much as he wanted to leave and let his boss have his privacy and time alone with his lover he just couldn’t. He couldn’t make his feet move him away from the scene and a small thought flashed across his mind that if he didn’t leave he’d never be able to have sex again; he’d only get off on watching.
 
That thought scared him enough that Danny turned and ran out of the room. The noise caught Mac and Horatio’s attention. They paused as the door slammed shut. “Was that someone coming in or going out?” Horatio asked, frowning.
 
“Out,” Mac replied. “So the question becomes who was in the room and did they see us?” He pulled back and grabbed the towel they’d brought in. “I’m sorry, H.”
 
Horatio smiled softly and leaned in to kiss Mac. “It’s not your fault, Mac,” he said, pulling up his pants and getting situated. “And I have to go if I’m going to catch my plane.”
 
“Call me when you get home?” Mac said, pulling Horatio into a hug.
 
“I promise,” Horatio whispered. “I hate leaving you, Mac. It tears me apart every time.”
 
“Me too, Horatio; me too.”
********************
 
Mac watched the cab with his lover drive away and sighed. Horatio was right; it was getting harder and harder to say good-bye. Maybe it was time for them to talk about moving to the same city. Mac snorted as he turned to go back to his office, he wouldn’t mind leaving the cold New York winters, the craziness the city seemed to inspire but he’d miss his lab. And that was the point holding them both back; they both loved their labs and their work almost as much as they loved each other.
 
He caught Danny watching him as he made his way towards his office and sighed again. He had a pretty fair idea of who had been in the locker room with him and Horatio but, at that point, Mac was really too frustrated to care. He couldn’t wait until he could go home and talk with his lover again.
 
“Hey Mac,” Don called, catching up to the CSI. “Can I talk to you a minute?”
 
“Sure, Flack,” Mac replied. He made his way around behind his desk and sat down. “What’s on your mind?”
 
“Danny,” Flack said. “I know he talked to you last night and I was just wondering if you had any suggestions.”
 
“Danny’s having a personal crisis, Don,” Mac said seriously. “His worldview has tilted, he’s thinking about certain things in a new light and his defenses are up. All we can do is support him but give him the space he needs to make his own choices without feeling pressured.”
 
“I don’t think I helped any.”
 
“He told me you said you don’t want your friendship to suffer,” Mac said. “Don’t let it. Make sure your interactions with him don’t change until he makes the first indication that he wants more.”
 
Flack sighed. “Can I ask about you?”
 
“You can but not here,” Mac replied. “I haven’t had a chance to sweep my office for spy cameras or microphones yet. Just be yourself, Don.”
 
“That I can do,” Flack agreed. “I think I’ll see if he wants to shoot hoops after work.”

 

Normally on the flight home Horatio read or caught up on the seemingly endless paperwork that crossed his desk but that day he just sat and stared out the window lost in thought. Despite what he’d told Mac, Danny’s rejection hurt and Horatio couldn’t help but wonder if he was treating any member of his team the same. He closed his eyes in a brief show of both pain and grief; he couldn’t lose anyone else. He just couldn’t.

***FLASHBACK***
 
The ocean had always called to Horatio Caine, especially after a hard day at work. He enjoyed the closeness of the bomb squad and the attention to detail the work required but there were times he liked to sit on a darkened section of the beach and listen to the waves as they broke on the shore.
 
There was a half moon illuminating the water as Horatio made his way along the sand. He wasn’t really thinking about anything special as he walked, the cool water washing over his bare feet, until he noticed a shape on the sand in front of him. As he got closer Horatio saw it was a young man with dark hair lying on the sand. At first Horatio thought he’d just fallen asleep but as he drew closer he could see that the young man’s hands were covered in blood.
 
Horatio dropped to his knees next to the young man, ripping his pale blue shirt into strips. He felt panic rising in his throat almost choking him as he did his best to stem the blood flow from both wrists before he pulled out his cell phone and called for help.
 
A search of the young man’s pockets turned up an ID. Horatio stared at it for a moment before tucking it carefully into his own back pocket. He took one of the young man’s hands gently in his own. “Tim, my name’s Horatio,” he said softly. “I need you to hang on for me, okay? I know you feel like you have nothing left or maybe there’s a loved one you want to join but please fight to stay. Please don’t leave me, Tim.”
 
Horatio kept talking until the emergency crews arrived and then told them he hadn’t found any ID. Mainly because of his rank the EMTs allowed Horatio to ride along to the hospital where he’d waited for news. Doctors told him they’d sewed up the wounds, which were self inflicted and deep, and that it was all up to the young man. Horatio asked if he could sit with the “john doe” and, despite their puzzlement, the doctors agreed.
 
He took time off from work and stayed at the hospital, only leaving to eat and use the restroom. Horatio couldn’t explain it but he felt a connection to the young man. And Horatio was the first person Tim Speedle saw when he woke up two days later. He recognized the soft voice that had been talking to him and felt at peace for the first time that he could remember. Speed went along with Horatio’s suggestion that he remain anonymous so the suicide attempt wouldn’t go on his record and Speed was eventually discharged to Horatio’s care. Horatio took his adopted son home and, slowly, Speed’s story started to come out and he began to heal.

***END FLASHBACK***
 
There were times that Horatio didn’t think anyone, except Mac, would understand how much it hurt to lose Speed the way he had. Horatio could still close his eyes and see his hands covered in Speed’s blood as he bandaged his son’s wrists and then again as Speed lay on the floor of the jewelry store.
 
Horatio came to the conclusion that he’d have to watch himself and how he interacted with his team to make sure he wasn’t accidentally smothering them the way he had been with Danny.
********************
 
Mac was lying on his bed propped up on pillows reading a book when his cell phone rang. He glanced at the display and smiled when he saw the name. “How’s my favorite red head?” he asked, putting his book on the bedside table.
 
“Missing a certain dark haired Marine,” Horatio replied. “Especially as we were interrupted this morning.”
 
“Hmmm, are you in bed, Horatio?” Mac asked. “Are you naked and hard for me?”
 
“Yeah,” Horatio whispered. “I had to be careful on the plane; every time I thought about you I started to get hard and the flight was full. It was all I could do to control myself until I was home and in the shower.”
 
“Tell me what happened,” Mac said, finger rubbing small circles around his right nipple.
 
Horatio moaned softly. “I wrapped my hand around my aching erection and pictured you down on your knees, mouth wrapped around my cock. You’re so hot when you go down on me like that, Mac. Then as I got close I took two fingers and shoved them into my ass, pretending you were getting me ready for your cock. I wanted to feel you take me fast and hard; so deep that I’d still be able to feel you when I was sitting at my desk doing paperwork.”
 
“Prep yourself,” Mac panted. “I know you have a toy there, Horatio.”
 
“Only if you do the same,” Horatio said. “Let’s see if we can come together, Mac. Stretch yourself carefully and picture me there on my knees between your legs just aching to take you; to feel your body wrapped around me.”
 
“If you keep talking like that it’ll all be over in a minute,” Mac groaned, reaching for the lube he’d left on the bed. “I can just picture you, H; spread out on the bed, white skin almost glowing in the moonlight, sweat starting to bead on that firm chest I love so much, cock thick and full just begging for my mouth.”
 
“Mac,” Horatio moaned and the change in tone told Mac that his lover had switched to speaker phone. He did the same and put his cell phone on the bed next to his head.
 
“I’m ready for you, Horatio,” Mac said, picking up the dildo Horatio bought him. He positioned it carefully and pushed, relishing the stretch as it sank into his body. “Oh yeah, you feel so good.”
 
Horatio’s answering moan told Mac they were on the same page. “Slow and steady, Mac,” Horatio said, his voice sounding strained. “Don’t hurt yourself.”
 
For the next few minutes the lovers murmured random comments to each other until Horatio caught the change in Mac’s breathing. “Wrap your long fingers around your cock and stroke yourself, Mac,” he said. “I want to hear you come apart for me.”
 
“Oh god, Horatio,” Mac moaned. His body tensed up and he came, distantly hearing Horatio cry out his name.
 
“I miss you, Mac,” Horatio said once they were cleaned up and under the covers.
 
Mac grinned. “I miss you too, Horatio,” he replied. “I was thinking maybe its time to talk about one or both of us moving.”
 
“I would like that,” Horatio said, yawning.
 
“Am I keeping you awake?” Mac teased.
 
“It’s been an emotional week,” Horatio said. “Mac, when you see Danny tomorrow, tell him I’m sorry.”
 
“For what?”
 
“Smothering him,” Horatio said. “Let Danny know it won’t happen again.”
 
“Horatio, talk to me,” Mac said seriously. “What’s going on? You have absolutely nothing to apologize for in this. Danny was being too sensitive and lashed out at you, not the other way around.”
 
“On the flight home I remembered the night I found Speed on the beach and the hospital stay after he woke up,” Horatio sighed. “We told them he was a john doe so no one would know what happened with him.”
 
Mac cured silently for a few seconds. It seemed that Danny had awoken more than a few nightmares in his lover’s past and Mac wouldn’t be able to hold Horatio for fourteen days.
 
“Horatio, love, listen to me,” Mac said. “You did everything you could for Speed. You gave him another chance at life, a home and a father who loved him. You have the biggest heart of anyone I know and I don’t want you tearing yourself up over Danny’s stupidity.”
 
“I’ll try, Mac,” Horatio said softly.
 
“That’s all I can ask,” Mac said. “Now I want you to imagine my arms wrapped around you, my body pressed up against yours and your head pillowed on my shoulder. I’ll hold you all night and keep the nightmares away.”
 
“I love you, Mac,” Horatio said. “I love you so much.”
 
“I love you too, H,” Mac whispered. “Now go to sleep and I’ll talk to you tomorrow. Call me if you need to.”
 
“I will; good night, Mac.”
 
“Night, love.” Mac closed his phone and burrowed down under his blankets. He’d have to have another talk with Danny and get him to not only understand what happened but get him to talk with Horatio before his lover’s depression ate him and their relationship.

 

“Hey Stella, I’ve got a problem,” Mac said closing the door to her office behind him.
 
“What’s wrong, Mac?”
 
“I know I just had the week off but I was wondering if you could hold the fort for a couple more days,” Mac said. “I need to go to Miami.”
 
“Is there something wrong with Horatio?”
 
He sighed. “Something that’s been brewing for a while,” Mac said. “The catch is that I need to take Danny with me.”
 
“That does sound serious,” Stella sighed. “I’ll find a way to make it work. Lord knows that you’ve got enough vacation that it’s not funny. Go on, Mac; take care of your partner.”
 
“Thanks Stella, I owe you.”
 
“I’m keeping a running tab,” she replied. She waved her hands at him. “Go on, shoo; before you get called to a crime scene.”
********************
 
“Danny, grab your overnight bag.”
 
“We got a case, Mac?”
 
“We’re going to Florida,” Mac replied.
 
“It’s because of Horatio isn’t it?” Danny said. “Jesus Mac, what’s wrong with you that…oof.”
 
Mac pinned Danny against the wall of the locker room and locked eye contact. “We all have fears in our lives, Daniel Messer,” he hissed. “Mine happens to be losing the man I love. I know yours is letting anyone get too close to you but that is no excuse for your behavior. When you got scared you lashed out at a man who was trying to do nothing more than help you and you cut his heart to ribbons. Speed was Horatio’s son. Do you have any idea what it did to Horatio to lose him like that? The man broke down in the morgue and wouldn’t leave because Speed would be all alone in the dark. I had to promise a nightlight to get Horatio to even consider leaving. And then when you showed up so obviously shaken Horatio was concerned for you because he knows exactly what you’re going through and you threw it all back in his face. Last night he told me to tell you that he was sorry for smothering you and he won’t let it happen again. You have no clue what you’ve lost, Danny; absolutely no idea.” He let go of his CSI and stepped back. “You have five minutes to grab your bag and meet me outside.”
********************
 
“Hey Messer what happened to you?” Flack asked falling into step with his friend.
 
“Mac; he’s acting all weird,” Danny replied. “I can’t talk right now, Don, I’ve only got a couple minutes to get outside or I’m really gonna be in trouble.”
 
“Is there anything I can do to help?” Don asked.
 
“Not a clue, Don, but thanks,” Danny said. “I’ll give you a call when I get home again.”
 
Flack stopped on the top of the stairs and watched as his friend (and hopefully soon-to-be-lover) climbed into the car with Mac and the dark haired detective pulled away without a glance at the young man next to him.
 
“Mac?” Danny said, not at all comfortable in the cold silence that filled the car.
 
“Yes?”
 
“Why are you taking me to Miami?”
 
“Because you are going to apologize to Horatio, the two of you are going to talk and work this out,” Mac said. “Then I’m going to stay a couple more days.”
 
“You could lose your job if you miss too many days,” Danny said.
 
“I don’t give a damn,” Mac snapped. “My place is with Horatio.”
********************
 
Horatio sat in his office and read reports. It was the last place he really wanted to be but people were leaving him alone unless they needed major help on a case. He spared a smile; his team was good at what they did and worked well together. Horatio blinked a few times to rid his eyes of the tears that formed when he thought about Speed.
 
“Hey Horatio?”
 
“Yes, Mr. Wolfe?” Horatio asked, turning to face the door. “What can I do for you?”
 
“I tried to catch you earlier but, well, I just wanted to say congratulations,” Ryan said. “Have we met your wife before?”
 
“No, um, actually she lives out of state at the moment,” Horatio said, taken by surprise.
 
“That’s rough,” Ryan said. “What’s her name?”
 
“Mackenzie Tessa,” Horatio said. “And I may be biased but she’s the most attractive woman I’ve ever met.”
 
Ryan grinned. “I can tell you love her,” he said. “You’ll have to bring in a picture for us to see. I’ll let you get back to work.”
 
Horatio leaned back in his chair with a small groan. He’d have to ask Mac to get a picture of Stella for him. And Horatio knew Calleigh and Eric would see through the lie in a second.
 
“Should I be jealous?” a dry, familiar voice asked over the sound of a shutting door.
 
“Mac?” Horatio whispered. He closed and rubbed his eyes but his lover was still there when he opened them again.
 
“I’m really here, H,” Mac said. “Stella managed to find a few more days they could do without me around and kicked me out.”
 
“Not that I’m not thrilled to see you but what are you doing here?”
 
The dark-haired man moved around to perch on the side of Horatio’s desk closest to his red-haired lover. “Because I’m worried about you,” he said, his leg pressed up against Horatio’s. “Are you at a place you can escape for a few hours?”
 
“It’s just reports,” Horatio said. “I’ve got a new toy at home I’ve been waiting to show you.”
 
“It’ll have to wait a bit, H; I brought Danny.”
 
“Why Mac?”
 
“Because the two of you need to talk,” Mac said. “Then we can send him home and have a couple days just for us.”
 
“I hope you know what you’re doing, Mac.”
 
“Trust me, H. Just trust me.”

Horatio’s house was nice, clean and not at all what Danny was expecting to see. For one there were no pictures of Speed or a wife. The later he could understand as he knew Mac didn’t have any pictures of Claire displayed; not even their wedding photo, but from what Mac had said Danny was expecting at least one picture of Speed.
 
He was studying a drawing of the beach when a noise behind him caught his attention. Horatio was on the sofa leaning against Mac who had an arm around his lover.
 
“Speed drew that,” Horatio said. “He had so many hidden talents, he could cook at an almost gourmet level and he wrote poetry too. I think I showed you some of it, Mac.”
 
“You did,” Mac replied, kissing Horatio’s left temple. “Especially the ones he did right after he came home from the hospital.”
 
“Sit down, Danny,” Horatio said softly. “I’m sorry for my actions towards you the other day. I didn’t realize what I was doing and was only concerned you’d been hurt. I never meant to suggest that you can’t take care of yourself. You won’t have to worry about it again.”
 
“Mac said Speed was your son,” Danny said.
 
“Not by blood,” Horatio said softly. “But I loved him as if he was my own and he knew it.” He looked down and twined his fingers with Mac’s. “He was hurt badly and it took him a long time to heal, to trust again, and he never really did.”
 
Mac shifted and pulled Horatio in against his chest. “Shhh, H, it’s okay,” he whispered. “Speed loved you and I know he’s missing you as much as you miss him. It wasn’t your fault, love. You didn’t kill him.”
 
Danny stared at Horatio as the lieutenant let all his walls fall, trusting his lover to keep him safe for a while. He winced as he wondered how much of the pain was from Speed’s death and how much was from his words just a few days ago.
 
“I found Speed on the beach the night he tried to kill himself,” Horatio said so softly that Danny almost missed what he was saying. “I got him to the hospital and was there when he woke up. It took him months to trust me enough to tell me his story, why he didn’t want anyone close to him. Even after he started at the lab he hid a lot of himself away so he wouldn’t get hurt again. I used to hear the whispers and knew how much they hurt him but he never was able to trust enough to let anyone but me and Mac see him as he truly was.”
 
“Why Mac?” was all Danny could think to say.
 
“Because Horatio loves and trusts me,” Mac said. “There are a lot of parallels between you and Speed, Danny. It’s one small reason Horatio is looking out for you. But we both know you’re not Speed and could never make that mistake. It’s your choice if you want to trust us with this or not.”
 
Horatio untangled himself from Mac and left the room. Mac watched him go with a small sigh. “He’s never forgiven himself for Speed’s death.”
 
“I don’t know what to say, Mac,” Danny said. “Horatio, he’s got such a good mask that I never realized how much he was hurting ‘til now.”
 
“I’m a little surprised myself, actually, but the anniversary of Speed’s death is coming up and that might have something to do with it,” Mac said. “Or it could be that he trusts you, Danny.”
 
Horatio came back into the room and handed Danny a drawing. “Speed did this a week before he was murdered,” he said. “Take it home with you, Danny, and think about what it means. Mac, I’ll be out back.”
 
“But we, I never, how?” Danny asked, turning to paper to Mac.
 
“You talked,” Mac replied, smiling at the perfect drawing of Danny’s face. “As far as I know Horatio never described you to Speed. He was talented. I’m going to check on Horatio, Danny; I want you to sit and think about what you’ve learned today.”
********************
 
The back yard was secluded and, at first, Mac didn’t see his lover. Then he caught a flash of red hair back towards the tree they’d planted for Speed. He made his way across the lawn and sat down on the ground with his lover. “I’ve been thinking about us living in two different cities,” he said, pulling Horatio against him and resting his chin on his shoulder. “And I think at the end of this year I’m going to retire and move south.”
 
“Really?” Horatio asked, resting his head against Mac’s. “You’d do that for me?”
 
“For you and for us,” Mac replied. “You were right this past week, coming home like that was what’s been missing for both of us. I love you, Horatio Caine, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Between my military pension and retirement from New York I won’t have to work if I don’t want.”
 
“You’d hate being idle,” Horatio murmured. “And you’re too smart for it.”
 
“I could write a book,” Mac said, turning his head to kiss Horatio’s cheek. “Or we could both retire and become recluses.”
 
Horatio smiled and turned, pushing Mac back against the grass. “Or we could team up at the lab and shock everyone by becoming the first openly gay couple to work for Miami-Dade,” he whispered, kissing Mac gently.
 
“Half the team knows already,” Mac said, pushing Horatio’s shirt off. “But if anyone dares touch you then they’re going to learn the meaning of the words pissed off Marine.”
 
“I love you, Mac,” Horatio said. “Thank you for bringing Danny down and giving me a chance to talk with him. I hope he’s able to understand my side of it now and go home in peace.”
 
“He won’t be at peace until he takes the chance and let’s Flack into his heart,” Mac murmured. He ducked his head and little and latched onto Horatio’s right nipple.
 
Horatio moaned and arched his back as small bolts of electricity shot down his spine and into his cock. “Feels good, Mac.”
 
“Let me take care of you?” Mac whispered, rolling them so he was on top.
 
“Always,” Horatio said. “Always.”

 

Danny sat and stared at the drawing in his hands. He was amazed at the attention to detail and how like him it looked. How had Speed known what he looked like from phone conversations alone? Danny didn’t think it was possible. He hadn’t realized that Speed was suicidal either. Danny couldn’t imagine being so in pain that you wanted to end your own life, to leave everything behind like that. But he also couldn’t imagine finding someone dying and taking care of them the way Horatio had. He knew he didn’t have the whole story and probably never would. Danny sighed, he really had to stop being so defensive when people wanted to get close or help him.
 
He stood and went towards the back of the house, remembering that Horatio had said he’d be in the back. The house was silent so Danny figured he was alone and wondered what kind of back yard Horatio had. As he looked out the glass doors his eyes failed to take in the neatly mowed lawn, the high hedges or the trees. He focused on the two men under a tree towards the back of the yard.
 
Mac was on his back, his chest bare, as Horatio seemed to be sucking on one of his nipples. The red head’s shirt was unbuttoned but still half tucked in to his black slacks. As Danny watched, Horatio pushed up onto his elbows and looked down at his lover and said something that made Mac smile and pull him down for a long kiss.
********************
 
“Do you think we should go check on Danny?” Mac asked, gasping as Horatio’s tongue did something wicked to his nipples.
 
“In a minute,” Horatio purred. “I want to taste you first.”
 
“What if he’s watching?”
 
“Then I hope he takes notes.”
 
Mac groaned as his lover’s warm body lifted off his and his pants were slowly undone. Horatio’s fingers reached inside and pulled Mac’s erection out. “Hmm, my favorite afternoon snack,” Horatio whispered, leaning down and licking up the vein on the underside of Mac’s cock. “I’m going to find a time machine, Mac.”
 
“Why?” Mac was barely able to follow the conversation with how expertly Horatio was working his body.
 
“To move us to the end of the year so we can be together,” Horatio purred his lips against Mac’s erection. He chuckled at the arch it earned him and licked up, taking Mac’s cock in his mouth, sucking gently.
 
Mac tangled his hands in his lover’s red hair with a low moan, his hips thrusting as the suction grew stronger until he stiffened and came with a cry. “Damn,” he muttered. “I don’t think I’m moving any time soon.”
 
“Then you don’t want to see the new toy I have for us to play with?” Horatio asked. “It’s in the bedroom and I promise you’ll like it.”
 
“If you bought it I’m sure I will,” Mac replied. He pulled his lover up for a kiss. “But we still have Danny here and I’m sure he’s wondering where we are.”
 
The two men took a moment to find and straighten their clothes before making their way into the house. It was Mac that noticed the note on the kitchen table.

****I understand what you were trying to tell me. I’m going home to talk with Don. Sorry it took so long for me to understand and I never meant to hurt you guys.****
 
Horatio wrapped his arms around Mac from behind and leaned in to kiss his neck gently. “So, you up for seeing that toy now?”
 
“In more ways than one,” Mac replied.
********************
 
Don Flack sighed as he tried to watch the hockey game but his mind just wouldn’t focus. He couldn’t forget how Danny had looked when he climbed into the car with Mac, how scared the younger CSI had been and Don wondered if Mac had done something to hurt Danny. Flack knew there wasn’t anything he could do to protect Danny, hell, Mac was a marine and could probably take out the taller detective with one hand while reading the latest case file.
 
He looked up when someone knocked on his door and stood with a sigh. At least it wasn’t his phone ringing, calling him back to work. Don opened his door and stared in shock at the sight of Danny Messer on the other side.
 
“Hey,” Danny said. “I get it.”
 
“Get what?” Don asked.
 
“Everything,” Danny replied. “And hopefully you here very soon.”
 
Don grinned and pulled Danny into his apartment, locking the door behind him. “Whatever you want, Messer; whatever you want.”