Title: How to Deal with Unruly Subordinates Who Happen to Be Your Lover
Rating: FRT-17
Author: Bj Jones
Disclaimer: I don’t own them. If I did that episode didn’t happen, and they probably couldn’t air it on network television. They are owned by various executives, studios, and producers who all have more lawyers on retain than I want to mess with. I’m not making any money, and promise to return them where I found them when I’m done.
Summary: Four supervisors get together and discuss their lovers.
Beta: Kay
Warning: Slash – What? Shocked – If you don’t like it don’t read it
Author’s Note: I blame Sarah!

Gil loosened his tie and leaned back in the chair. His award for ‘Excellence in the Forensics Field’ sat in the middle of the table next to Lt. Horatio Caine’s ‘Community Service’ award. Horatio looked as enthused about his award as Gil felt about his. Another award was added to the pile as Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs sat down. Gil tried not to snicker at the growling ex-Marine. He guessed Agent Gibbs didn’t like the award for ‘Years of Service in the Forensics’. Gil wasn’t surprised when the fourth award joined the pile. Mac Taylor had looked a bit perturbed when accepting his ‘Advancement in Forensics’ award.

“Thank God that’s over,” Horatio sighed, undoing his tie as he sipped his drink. “I hate these things.”

“I still can’t believe that the Director forced me to come. I never accept my awards,” Jethro growled. “That’s Tony’s job. He keeps them all in a drawer for me. Though I’m not supposed to know about it”

“One of your agents accepts and keeps your awards for you?” Mac asked. “Why didn’t I think of that? Hmm wonder if I can get Stella or Danny to do it.”

“I like that idea,” Gil agreed. “I hate public gatherings. Especially these events, where the big wigs who sit behind a desk need to prove their power and existence by handing out awards to the ones they think are doing a good job.”

“Politics,” Horatio grinned. “You have to love it.”

“Can’t we just shoot them?” Jethro asked.

Mac grinned. “Well, we do know how to hide the bodies.”

“I think you would find plenty of help.” Horatio looked over the scattered tables checking on his team. “My team doesn’t get along very well with the politicians.”

“But you do well with them.” Gil pointed to the award.

Horatio sighed. “Unfortunately.”

Mac looked over to see Stella chatting excitedly with Calleigh, Catherine, and Ziva. “Should we be worried?” Mac asked the men at the table.

All four looked over at the table. “I would be more worried about how well Greg and Abby are getting along.” Jethro turned and eyed the two at a separate table.

Horatio grinned at the MEs, who sat at another table talking quietly. Next to them Warrick was talking with Sheldon, McGee, Ryan and Eric. But it was the last table that had him worried. “Actually, gentlemen I think we should be more concerned at what’s being discussed at that table.”

Gil followed his motion towards the table across the room. He groaned. Nick was chatting with Tony, Danny, and Speed. That couldn’t be good.

“So Gil,” Mac smiled.

Gil eyed the New York CSI. “Yes?”

He nodded towards a table off to the side where Sara and Lindsey were chatting. “How often do you have to stop Nick from killing Sara?”

Gil laughed. “Nick is very easy going. He can attract psychos from a ten mile radius, but he’s still very laid back. Most of the time he ignores it, though one day I think he’ll lose it.” Gil grinned over at Nick. “I can’t wait to see it.”

“Hope he’s not getting tips from Tony,” Jethro groaned. “He practically jumped me in the bull pen just to get the point across to my ex.”

“Which one?” Horatio asked.

Jethro glared. “The one that’s the Director now.”

“That’s got to be awkward,” Mac cringed. “I swear as good a CSI as Lindsay is, she’s blind to what’s in front of her.”

“Your team knows?” Gil asked.

“You can’t get anything past Stella,” Mac pointed out. “Sheldon figured it out and Flack caught us.”

Horatio laughed. “Awkward moment?”

“Slightly,” Mac said. “How about your team?” he looked over at Gil.

“Catherine knew from the beginning, but that’s like keeping things from Stella.” Gil looked over at the snickering woman. “Warrick figured it out when Nick had been…” Gil paused, even after a year the thought still scared him. “After he had been kidnapped, Nick wanted to tell Greg and Sara.”

“So Sara knows?” Jethro asked, a bit surprised.

“Nope, she never got what Nick was trying to say.” Gil shrugged. “She just thought I had been helping him through this rough moment in his life.”

“How long have you been together?” Horatio asked.

“Since the first time he got a gun pulled on him.” Gil shook his head. “Did I mention he’s a magnet for trouble?”

The other supervisors snorted. “Danny found trouble while locked in a panic room with a dead guy.”

“Tony caught the plague in the 21st Century,” Jethro pointed out.

They all looked at Horatio. “What? My guy doesn’t attract trouble, okay, except for the fact he rides that death trap. He’ll tell you I get into more trouble than he does.”

“That is true.” Mac looked at Horatio. “I’ve heard from Danny how much Speed complains about your ‘whims’.”

”It doesn’t scare you that those two chat?” Jethro asked.

“You do realize they are also talking with Tony,” Mac pointed out. “After that case with NCIS a few months ago.”

“I didn’t.” Jethro glared at Tony. Tony turned in his seat and grinned at him. “Though all four of them together, now that is a scary thought.”

“They probably formed a support group,” Gil added. “It can’t be easy being with us.”

“No, it can’t.” Horatio sighed. “But I will never get the image of Speed lying on the floor bleeding out of my head.” Horatio looked over at the dark haired CSI. “All because I wasn’t paying attention.”

“How is he doing?” Mac asked, his eyes following Horatio’s stare. He remembered the call from Horatio after Speed had been shot the fear he had heard in the other man’s voice.

“Good.” Horatio turned back towards Mac. “We have good days and bad days. But if I ever get hold of his parents…”

“If I help you with his parents, will you help me with Tony’s?” Jethro asked seriously. “When he was laying there suffering from the plague they didn’t even acknowledge him. Kate…” Jethro paused. “Kate told me that she called them to let them know what was going on. His father said ‘let me know if he dies.’”

Mac shook his head. “It’s amazing how parents can mess a kid up.” He glanced over at Danny, who was laughing over something with Speed. “The Messers did a number on him, doesn’t help they still like to reach out and poke at him.”

“Nick’s lucky.” Gil shook his head. “His family supports him and our relationship.”

“He just attracts psychos from a ten mile radius.” Horatio said.

“Don’t remind me,” Gil groaned. “He’s the only CSI I know that has had a gun pulled on him so many times I’ve lost count, been tossed out a window, stalked, and buried alive.”

“How do you handle it?” Mac asked. “I mean I watch Danny like a hawk since we got together. If I’m not working a case with him ,I have him with Stella or Don.”

“He’s with me or Warrick,” Gil said. “He called me on it, but considering his past reputation he accepted it. He’s still hesitant sometimes in the field. Not a lot but on those dark nights, in a dark alley he gets a bit freaked.”

“How do you handle Speed?” Jethro asked Horatio.

“I trust him out in the field with no problems,” Horatio shrugged. “Over the past year we’ve dealt with the gun issue. He’s actually a crack shot now. Part of me hates that fact.”

“He doesn’t seem to be the type to like guns,” Mac observed.

“No, he doesn’t.” Horatio agreed. “But there was a lot more going on than him not cleaning his gun.”

“Let me guess.” Mac leaned back. “Doesn’t talk about his past. Holds things in. Puts himself down. Doesn’t take credit when it’s deserved, but craves any he can get.”

“Yep.” Horatio nodded. “Danny?”

“Oh yeah,” Mac sighed. “I’m telling you, one day I’m having a long conversation with Papa Messer.”

“Tony hides behind the fun loving playboy image. Sometimes it hurts watching it. I see some digs Ziva gives him and there’s a pain in his eyes right before the mask comes up,” Jethro said.

“It amazes me the strength they have.” Gil sipped his drink. “All four have had something in their pasts that have made weaker men turn towards a life of crime. Yet, they didn’t. Danny didn’t follow in his family’s footsteps. Speed didn’t fall into a world of drugs. Tony could easily have been a playboy taking whatever and whoever he wanted. Nick could have followed the pattern of abuse.”

“Yet they pulled themselves out and made a good life for themselves,” Jethro agreed.

”With a little help from you.” Tony stood nearby grinning. “Now if you are all done talking about us. I would like to drag this old Marine dog upstairs and put his ‘Years of Experience’ to use.”

Jethro grabbed his award. “Night all.” The three laughed.

Nick sat down in Jethro’s seat. “So if I make out with you on the table, do you think Sara would catch on?”

“No.” Speed shook his head, taking a seat next Horatio. “She would figure you were drunk and Danny and I dared you to do it.”

Nick laughed. “That’s not funny.”

“The sad thing.” Danny plopped down next to Mac. “I could do a striptease and get Mac to jump me and Lindsay would still tell me ‘he’s humoring you’.”

“I’m so glad we’re out to our team,” Speed grinned at Horatio.

“Like we had a choice,” Horatio snorted. “Alexx threatened my life in front of the lab when you came in with a black eye.”

“Well you did hit me,” Speed smirked at him.

“Brat,” Horatio grinned back. “Taught you not to tickle me.”

“Not really, just got better at ducking.” Speed picked up the award. “This is what, your fifth Community Service?”

Horatio rolled his eyes. “Something like that.”

Speed grinned at the group. “It’s past his bedtime. All that community service tires him out.” He stood up, grabbed Horatio’s hand, and pulled him up out of his chair. “Night.”

They ignored the snickering girls as they walked by. Stella and Calleigh got up and joined the four men at the table. “We had an idea,” Calleigh giggled.

“Where’s Catherine?” Gil asked. He hadn’t seen her leave.

“Lindsey called.” Stella glanced over at the CSI. “The twelve-year-old not the teenager.”

Danny started laughing. “Stella…” Mac glared at her.

“What?” Stella acted innocently. “Ziva said something about a cute bartender and took off. So you’re stuck with us two.”

“What are the two of you up to?” Nick asked.

“We had an idea.” Calleigh giggled again. “Okay, the fifth margarita might have been too much.”

“Idea?” Gil asked, concerned.

“If you leave with Nick and Mac leaves with Danny,” Stella pointed out. “Then Sara would leave with Lindsay. The idea is that if they leave together – they’ll get drunk because once again their plans of catching their man have been foiled. Then end up in bed together.”

Danny got up and actually pulled Mac out of his chair. “Let’s get this plan started.”

Stella looked at Calleigh. “Do you think the boys would let us watch?”

Nick shook his head. “Speed warned me about you.” He pointed at Calleigh.

“A girl has to try,” Calleigh pouted. “Oh well let’s go and torment Eric and the guys over there.”

The two girls headed for the other table. Eric and Ryan both got up and ran for it. Nick laughed as he turned back to Gil. “I do not attract psychos from a ten mile radius.”

Gil laughed. He grabbed Nick’s hand then his award. “Let’s go. I’m tired. It’s been a long day and you know how I hate these things.”

“Yes, you need sleep in your old age.” Nick smiled at him.

”I’ll show you old,” Gil growled lightly. “Just you wait.”

~ Next Morning ~

Horatio sat down at the breakfast table smirking. “So how was your evening?”

Jethro grinned. “Tony’s still asleep.”

“I was going to ask last night.” Mac sipped his coffee. “How do you deal with unruly subordinates who happen to be your lover?”

Gil slipped into the seat. “Fuck them into the mattress until they stop being unruly.”

“Works for me,” Jethro grinned.

“Me too,” Horatio laughed.

“The desk works as well,” Mac grinned. “Only problem is the glass walls.”

The four supervisors laughed. Having no idea their four subordinates were at the other table, listening in and plotting.

~ The End ~