Title: Remeber Me
By: mangojunkie
Pairing: N/G
Rating: N-17
Category: Drama, Angst
Spoilers: minor spoiler for Season 3 'playing with fire'
Warnings: sexual content
Summary: Nick has to help Greg find his way back in order to save their relationship.
Disclaimer: Still don't own them, CSI or anything else connected to CBS, CSI or Nick/Greg.
A/N: I actually posted this about half a year ago at wmtdb, so it might look familiar to some of you.
Beta: anmani who I love for being so great and for knowing what I actually want to say.

It was Sunday morning, 6.15am and Nick's first day off since two weeks. So getting a call at that hour, interrupting his sleep, wasn't exactly what he had in mind.

He finally managed to roll over, grab the telephone and with a sleepy, thick voice he answered.

"Stokes."

"Mr. Stokes, this is Ananda Jones from Desert Palms..."

"The hospital?"

"Yes. We have a Greg Sanders. We..."

"Greg?" Nick asked shocked, now completely awake.

"What happened? How is he? Is he alright?"

"Is it possible for you to come in?" the nurse asked, ignoring Nick's questions.

"Yes... sure, no, no problem at all. I'll come in... I'm on my way." he said before hanging up, getting out of bed and running to the bathroom, his clothes in hand.

He managed to get to his car within five minutes.

The drive to Desert Palms were the most awful 20 minutes of his whole life. Greg was supposed to be with his parents at the West Coast for the weekend. Actually Greg was supposed to come back that day, but apparently something had gone wrong.

Reaching the hospital Nick just hoped that it was nothing serious. But why should they have asked him to come in, if it was nothing serious?

"Sorry, can you help me? I'm looking for Greg Sanders."

The nurse looked at several sheets of papers and finally said "206, just down the corridor, the room at the end on the right side."

When Nick stood in front of said room he knocked and entered prepared for the worst.

He found Greg lying in a bed. Stepping closer he saw bandages and band aids covering most of the skin not covered by the hospital gown. There were still traces of dried blood and several bruises where showing. There were several infusions. Nick just stood at the end of the bed, looking at Greg in shock. Then he heard someone else enter the room, but he couldn't turn around, he just couldn't turn away from the picture of Greg lying there being so helpless and vulnerable.

"Relative?" a voice asked.

Nick looked to the man now standing next to him, realizing it was a doctor.

"Excuse me?"

"Are you a relative?"

"Ahm...sort of. I'm his boyfriend." Nick said. Months ago he would have had a problem with saying it out loud, but now he didn't really care what people might think.

"What happened?" Nick wanted to know.

"He was involved in a car accident. The other guy crashed frontally in his car, died from the impact instantly. They assume he was drunk, lost control, swerving over into the oncoming traffic. As I said it was a frontal collision and it's a bit of miracle that Greg here is still alive."

"So how is he then?"

"Actually quite good. We are optimistic that everything will be alright. I know what you think right now. You see all the injuries and the IV's thinking the worst and I'm just saying everything will be okay to calm you down. But it looks worse than it actually is."

Being relieved, but also still doubting what the doctor had just said, he looked at Greg again and saw that he was coming around.

Opening his eyes the first thing he saw was a dark clad brunette looking anxiously at him.

"Thank God, you are awake. How are you, babe? Are you in pain? Do you need anything?" The brunette blurted out, moving to the side of the bed and sitting down, reaching for his hand. He moved his head and looked at the brunette trying to figure out just who that man was.

The brunette took his hand as the most natural thing and rubbed it softly.

"What is it, G?" the brunette asked with audible panic.

The obvious concern for him shown by the brunette scared him, since he had absolutely no idea who the man was.

"Who...who are you?" he asked worriedly.

Nick, completely shocked first, stuttered something that sounded like a 'what' and then turned around to face the doctor.

"Greg has...he has amnesia. He doesn't remember much, only a few things from when he was a kid. So far we can't tell you how long it's going to last. Maybe just a few days, maybe a few weeks or even months. We just can't tell you. We found out how to reach you by taking a look at his wallet where you were marked as the person who should be called if something happened."

"So, he doesn't remember anything at all?"

"No, there are things he knows. He hasn't forgotten about everything, but most of it."

"Will the memories come back at once or will they come back part by part?"

"Depending. Sometimes a special event helps remembering. But... every case is different. We've had patients who got all their memory back at once, and we also had people, where everything came back in small parts. You just need to be patient." he said, taking a look at his watch. "Sorry, but I need to go, I have another patient waiting for me. I will drop in later again." he said, leaving the room and closing the door behind him.

"Greg...I know this all must be quite-"

"Who are you?"

"Greg...I...We...You... I'm your boyfriend." Nick finally said, waiting a few moments and added: "We've been together for eight months."

"We are... I'm...you are...WHAT? You're my boyfriend? Does that mean I'm ... gay?" Greg asked, he didn't sound shocked, more surprised.

"Last time you said 'bi', but anyway, yes, I'm your boyfriend... Don't you remember anything at all?" Nick asked concerned.

"I know the basics, like my name is Greg and that I'm 28. I know some things from my youth, but the rest I can't remember."

Nick looked worried at Greg, but he knew if he was freaking out now, Greg would be totally frightened and that was the last thing he wanted right now. He took Greg's hand again, pressed it harder and looked at a slightly smiling Greg.

"We'll get through this, don't you worry." he said, hoping Greg would believe it.

They fell silent, both lost in thought. Nick because he didn't know how to handle a situation like that and Greg because he had a giant mental leap to take, being involved with a man wasn't what he'd imagined.

"So... we are together?" Greg asked and waited for a nod. "How's our relationship been so far?"

"For me it's heaven on earth. You mean the world t me and okay so maybe it's not perfect, but it's the closest I've ever been. We've our rough moments but we've worked past them so far. Apart from you always giving me a hard time and being a tease, but I wouldn't want you any other way."

"Does anybody know about us?"

"Yes, everybody at work actually. I think it took you over six months to finally get me to tell my parents that I'm not just gay, but also in a relationship with a co-worker. I think it was quite a shock for them in the beginning, but they accepted it eventually. Last summer we were actually visiting them, you and me I mean."

"And my parents?"

"They met me as well, if it's that what you mean. And they liked me a lot, or as you used to say 'the perfect choice for their son'" Nick smiled.

"So they accepted me being gay?"

"Yes, they didn't have a problem with it all."

Greg sighed out loud.

"What is it, babe?"

"It's just so frustrating having not being able to remember. I just...I need my memory back."

"I'm pretty sure it won't take that long until you remember everything and use it against me again." Nick smiled even more.

He leaned forward, with the intent to kiss Greg, but thought better of it realizing that Greg would need time to adjust. So he just pulled him into a hug.

"You will see... everything will be fine." He said getting up and taking Greg's hand again, kissing the palm of it. Then he left the room.

Greg still lying in the bed, thought about what had just happened. Nick seemed to be a nice guy, but being his boyfriend?

He couldn't remember anything past getting his chemistry set and this...this seemed to be so important.

The next day Nick visited Greg again, bringing things that might help him remembering, or at least help to rebuild his identity.

Comics, CDs, books and some cloths. Greg took one of the books and opened it.

"That's a book about chemistry." He noticed, holding the book up.

"Yeah, that's right, you love chemistry and everything that's related to it. That's why you studied it."

"I studied chemistry? Do I have a Ph.D. in it?"

Nick laughed at that. "No, baby, sorry to disappoint you, you don't have a Ph.D."

"So, what do I do for living?"

"You work with me at the local CSI. You are a lab tech, actually the best in the whole state and the whole western USA. I'm a CSI. We work as a team, a damn good one, in the night shift. And the lab is actually the place where we met for the first time. You've always told me that for you it was love at first sight. For me it took a bit longer to see that you're more than just another friend."

"And do we live together, or do we have separate places?"

"You moved in with me about two months ago."

"And we live...?"

"In Vegas, Well, not directly in Vegas, a bit outside. We have a house and a dog."

"We have a dog?"

"Yes, Phoenix, you adore her."

Nick could see how Greg took in all the new information. Every single bit was a part of his identity.

"Can you tell me what had happened? I mean, I was involved in a car accident, wasn't I?" Greg asked.

"Yes you were. It happened on your way back from your parents. They told me there was a drunken driver, who lost control over is car and crashed into you. He died on the spot. You were the lucky one."

"Was there any reason why I was at my parents?"

"You were just visiting them. You go there every two weeks if possible."

"Did I have a close relationship to them?"

At that question Nick threw his head from one side to the other.

"Sort of. You used to go every two months, but three months ago your dad was hospitalized. So you decided to go more often and you call them nearly every day. And before you get all worked up, your dad is fine. I just talked to them a couple of hours ago, but I left out the part with you having a car accident. I didn't want to worry them. But I guess they will find out eventually. So maybe I should call them tonight."

Nick looked at his watch, noticing that he needed to go.

"Sorry, Greg, but I gotta go, I'll come by tomorrow again." This time Nick gave Greg a peck on the cheek, grabbed his jacket and left the room.

Nick dropped by daily staying for hours and patiently answering all Greg's questions. He hoped it would help Greg when he could answer as many questions as precise as possible, but after another two weeks there was still no sign of Greg remembering anything at all.

But the doctors allowed Greg to leave hospital and go back home. So Nick took Greg home.

"So this is where we live then?" Greg asked as they drove into the driveway and Nick shut the engine off.

"Yes, this is our place." Nick answered, as he got out of the car and went to get Greg's stuff out of the trunk.

As they went inside Nick offered Greg to give him a tour.

"Isn't that strange? I use to live here, but can't remember anything of this. This is so frustrating."

"Greg, stop rushing things. It'll all come back. You'll see."

He showed Greg around, hoping he would start remembering.

When they ended up in the bedroom Greg noticed the pictures on the wall.

Photos of him and Nick.

"Oh my goodness me."

"What?" Nick asked in panic.

Greg pointed at the photo he stood in front of. "I ...I remember that. That was in... Canada. A couple of months ago. It was a weekend trip. You...It was a surprise for me."

Nick smiled at that, took a step forward to be closer to Greg and looked at the picture.

"Yeah, that's right. Surprised you with this trip, because you were always complaining about my lack of spontaneity." Nick laughed.

"I can't remember details about the trip, but I know I loved it."

"Oh yes. You loved it. After these two days you actually planned on moving there. It took me a whole week to talk you out of actually doing it."

Greg looked at the other photos.

"Was that also on a holiday?"

"No, that was when we visited your parents, and the one next to this is when we visited mine."

"And who is this?" Greg asked, pointing at a photo of a woman, smiling. Greg gave Nick a worried look and Nick responded by laughing.

"You know, the first time you saw that picture, you were looking at me with exactly the same expression on your face. She's my sister Jessica, so no competition. So can wipe those worry lines off your face."

"Jessica? Your sister? ...Isn't she married?"

"Yes."

"And you don't like your brother in law, right?"

"Still don't like him, like the rest of the family." Nick said, glad that Greg seemed to remembering things.

"You hungry?" Nick asked.

"No thanks, but I'm actually quite tired. So if you don't mind..."

"No, not at all. You just go and have a lay down... and maybe after a nap you feel like something to eat."

Another four weeks passed by and Greg had remembered nearly everything, even the accident, but anything regarding their relationship still escaped him. Though he was getting frustrated Nick never showed it to Greg. He just couldn't understand why Greg remembered nearly everything about his family, Nick's family and all the other things, but not about what they had. He tried to give Greg as much space as possible and not to push him into anything, because so far it seemed to Nick that Greg was still insecure about what they had. There were no kissing, no intimate touches and Nick had moved into the guestroom.

However seeing Greg and thinking back the last few weeks it was like they'd become friends again.

But it didn't seem like Greg was finding his way back into their relationship.

But Nick was not about to give up. He didn't want to give up. Neither Greg nor what they had.

So maybe all he needed to do was to make Greg fall in love with him again. It would be some sort of a new start for their relationship.

First step was a dinner at their favorite Italian. That means it was their favorite restaurant before all this happened. Maybe a romantic dinner would be the perfect beginning for a 'new' relationship.

"How frustrating is this?" Greg wanted to know.

"What do you mean?"

"This whole thing. The fact that we two had a relationship before this all happened and I can't remember anything about it. You know what we had, you remember it all. And now you have to deal with me, the one who doesn't remember anything."

"It's strange...and yeah... frustrating. Seeing you and not being able to do what we used to do, to kiss you, to hold you. I found the perfect match for me and you can't remember anything about the time we had. But I'm not complaining, because I know how hard it must be for you."

"Nick? I know this must sound strange, but did anything happen on the day I drove to my parents? Did we fight? Or...I don't know, did you tell me something, confess something?"

"No, we did not fight that day. Why should we, our relationship was pure harmony." Nick laughed.

"But we sort of argued two days before." he added.

"What was it about?" Greg asked curious.

"It wasn't a fight, it was just... I don't know. I guess I just got jealous, because of a guy hitting on you and... And I just ... I don't know... freaked out. But it was just a small argument, nothing to worry about."

"Did we clear the situation?" Greg asked, looking into Nick's eyes.

Nick turned his head to the side, awfully blushing, smiling slightly and mumbling something that sounded suspiciously like 'yes'.

Maybe Greg couldn't remember anything about their relationship, but he knew exactly what that sort of reaction meant.

"No more questions about that." Greg smiled.

As the evening went on Greg kept on asking more and more questions about their relationship.

"So we've been together eight months?"

"Yes."

"How did we ... you know end up together?"

"There was always that special chemistry between the two of us. We used to tease each other, making jokes and all that kind of stuff. And then one day you confessed that you'd fallen in love with me. Back then I was a little insecure and had a problem with accepting who I was."

"You rejected me?"

"Yes... at first. But I found it pretty brave of you to tell me, risking our friendship. It took me another couple of weeks to realize that I needed to accept who I was and how I felt about you. But asking you out was not as easy as I thought it would be. I was afraid you would reject me this time. But you didn't. We got a first date settled. And ever since we share each others ups and downs, good and bad moments, lives and beds."

"How did our colleagues at work respond when they found out?"

"After I told them they were great, congratulated us and wishing us all the best for the future. They didn't seem to have a problem with us in a same sex relationship."

"So we are happy?"

"Yes, pretty much."

As the evening ended and they came back home, Nick gave his plan to win Greg back a second thought. Maybe there was a reason why Greg couldn't remember anything about their relationship. What if Greg would never remember what they had? Would that mean Nick would loose Greg? Because he definitely would Greg let go if he had to. He wanted Greg to be happy, and if it meant letting Greg go, because he wasn't happy, he'd do it in a heartbeat.

The next day Nick decided to give Greg's doctor a visit. Maybe he could explain why there still were no memories about the relationship.

"There could be a lot of reasons, it could just be a coincidence or it could be that something bad had happened and he's trying to repress it. Did anything happen between the two of you?" the doctor asked.

"That's the whole point. Nothing happened. Everything was great. There is no reason, why he should repress something."

"Nick, I know this sounds strange now, but is there... is... ahm... there a possibility, that before the accident Greg could have thought about leaving you?"

"You think he can't remember anything, because he wanted to leave me? That's absolutely ridiculous. Yeah, we had fights, but not serious enough to make him want to leave. I always had the feeling that it meant more to him than to me being together.

"Maybe he met someone else."

" Are you trying to tell me that he can't remember, because it was over for him mentally? You haven't gotten the sligthest idea about the nature of our relationship."

"Nick, I'm sorry, but I'm just trying to find an explanation for all this. And I can clearly see that it's eating you up. Don't forget yourself. You don't look so good right now." he said, looking concerned.

"To be honest, it is not as easy as I thought. I knew it would be tough, but I always thought he might remember or at least there might be feelings which would make it possible to build up a sort of 'new' relationship. But when I look at him, I don't see any feelings that might indicate that there will be an 'us' anytime soon or even ever again. Do you know what it feels like to look in the face of the person you love and you wanting kiss, touch and feel him, but you can't?

Or what it feels like to love someone who used to love you so intensely and now doesn't have a clue as to the existence of that love? That's a torture I hope no one has to experience. And for me this torture is only bearable because there's still hope of him remembering it all, but now you tell me that there might not be. I mean is there even a possibility that someone can forget about his feelings?"

"Not really forget no, but... work with me here and imagine that you were Greg, waking up with two strangers in an unfamiliar room. One of them tells you that he's your boyfriend and that you're gay, bi or whatever you wanna call it."

"You mean by telling him he's gay I shocked him so much that he forgot about me?"

"No, by telling him you are his boyfriend. If you want to hear my opinion, I'm guessing that by telling him how important you were to him, he freaked not being able to remember you. And he probably pushed himself so hard trying to remember that he got the opposite result.

"He didn't remember me at all." Nick realized.

"But it's not like I want him to remember everything all at once. I mean he should take all the time he needs."

"Yeah, I know, but you have to make him realize that."

"And how am I going to do that? Right now all he sees is a friend."

"You will find a way, but..."

"Yeah, I know don't push him" Nick finished the sentence.

With this Nick got up and said "Thanks for your time." before he left the office of Greg's doc.

Driving home he thought about how he and Greg could possibly find their way back to each other.

"Greg, are you home?" Nick shouted as he closed the front door behind him.

"Greg?" he shouted again, this time louder, when he didn't get any response. When he still didn't get any response he started wandering around the house looking for him, he heard the shower running.

Nick let himself fall onto the couch, waiting for Greg to come out of the shower. He closed his eyes for just a second, or that's what he planned on doing, but when he opened them again, he saw Greg sitting next to him.

Looking like he'd fallen asleep.

"How long have you been sitting there?" Nick asked.

"About 15 did I wake you up?"

"No, I didn't mean to fall asleep anyways."

"Where have you been all morning, you've been gone for hours."

Nick had to smile, because it sounded like Greg was jealous, like he'd gotten on occasion even the tone of his voice was right.

"Ahm... I was just checking on a few things. Nothing important." Nick finally lied, knowing that if he was going to tell him the truth about his whereabouts he would just set Greg even more under pressure.

"Nick .. I... ahm... I think I'll start working again in the lab. Sitting here all day isn't really helping me and me not remembering our relationship won't interfere with my job right?"

"No, I don't think so. It sounds like a good idea actually. Would help you to occupy your mind and I know that Cath and Warrick, heck everybody would be glad to see you back in good health.."

They agreed that Greg should start working again. Nick just needed to inform Grissom and get his approval on okay.

Grissom had no problems letting Greg work as long as the amnesia didn't interfere with his job and he started back the following day.

Back in the lab everybody hovered over him and kept asking him how he was doing and if there was anything they could do for him.

During the whole shift Greg had not one single moment to think about Nick, self and his memory loss.

In fact he didn't see Nick all night, but everybody else seemed to check on him hourly. It slowly began to annoy Greg, all the attention, all the questions and all the worry.

When he closed the front door Greg let out a sigh, happy that his first day back at work went that well, but also relieved not to have to answer more questions from worried colleagues..

"Hey, you alright?" Nick looked around the corner from the kitchen.

"Yeah, just..."

"Tired?"

"Yeah, a bit, but glad I have gotten rid of all my mother hens."

"They were just concerned. They hadn't heard anything about you for the past two months. All the information they got about you came from me."

"Yeah, it's just...ahm... I don't know." Greg said, walking towards Nick. Nick looked slightly worried at Greg, not sure what was bothering him. Maybe it had been too early for Greg to go back to work.

"You're sure you're alright?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. It's just ... ah nothing...forget about it." he suddenly said, turning away from Nick.

"Greg?!" Nick said, having that tone in his voice which indicated Nick did not believe him and he wanted to hear what the matter with him was.

"I..." Greg started, searching for words.

"Greg, whatever it is, you can tell me. I won't be mad or freak out or anything else."

Although he still had his back turned towards him Greg knew Nick was smiling his worried smile. Greg closed his eyes, turned around and walked back towards Nick, who was still standing between the kitchen and the living room. He took a deep breath and began to speak again.

"Nick, I want you to... I want to know what it felt like when we were together, when you kissed me, when your hands were on me, when ...I don't know what else. I just want to feel again what I felt before this all happened." Greg confessed to a confused looking Nick.

"You know, Greg, as much as I would love to, do you really think that is the right way to go about it?" Nick asked.

"Yes, maybe there are other ways, but...I just want to try this one, please." Greg pleaded.

Nick still not sure what to do looked at Greg. On the one hand he would love nothing more than having Greg's lips on his again and to just kiss him senseless, the way they used to before Greg's accident. But on the other hand he was not sure if he really should do it. Greg probably didn't even realize just what he was asking Nick to do. So maybe he should just turn Greg's request down and save them the awkward moment when Greg would realize that it didn't help. Besides Nick knew it would be pure torture to be so close to something he missed so badly.

But what if Greg was right? What if it really helped him, in one way or another?

So Nick stepped forward and without saying anything he sealed Greg's lips with his. After all he was just a guy, and who was he to deny it when something good was offered to him? Nick gently slipped his tongue out seeking permission from Greg. That way it would be Greg's decision to go through with his own experiment

And it looked like Greg was sure about what he wanted, because Nick noticed Greg's lips opening up. Deepening the kiss he slung his arms around Greg's waist and pulled him in closer. Nick took in everything from Greg. The way he smelled, his cologne mixed with the smell of wax and gel in his hair, the chemicals from work, and something that was just pure Greg. The way his lips felt against his, so soft and like velvet. The way his skin felt under his hands. So soft, so silky, he couldn't get enough of it.

They stood there for a couple of minutes, forgetting about everything around them. When they eventually parted, Nick could hear how Greg was gasping. During the whole kiss Nick had his eyes closed, enjoying and trying to inhale as much of Greg's scent as possible.

Now opening them again Nick was not sure about what to expect. A shocked Greg? A flushed Greg? An irritated and confused Greg?

What he really saw was Greg, with eyes closed, head slightly tilted and lips slightly parted. Nick just had to smile about that image, it was just too adorable. On one hand it was cute to see Greg that way again and on the other this whole image of Greg reminded Nick about the time before the accident. Seconds passed by and Greg didn't move a muscle, the only sign of him still being alive was that he was still standing in front of Nick, who was getting really worried

"Are you okay, G? Everything alright?" Several more moments passed by before Greg answered. It was a soft, quiet, whispered and barely hearable 'yes'. When Greg finally managed to open his eyes, he saw Nick.

"And?" he heard him asking, voice insecure.

"That was...just... I don't know how to describe it. It was so... fantastic and awesome. In the beginning it felt kinda strange and new. But suddenly it was so normal, that it felt like coming home somehow."

"So did it help? Is your theory proven right?" Nick asked.

"It's not that I remember...I hadn't expected that anyway, but there are images coming back to me."

"Good."

Greg stepped forward, closer to Nick. He laid his head on Nick's chest, letting Nick's arm pull him in closer. His left cheek on Nick's chest, Greg buried himself even deeper in Nick, as if he tried to actually get to be inside, to crawl inside of Nick.

"I want to remember it all. I need to... or it'll driving me insane pretty soon."

"Greg... just take your time, nobody is forcing you."

"No, maybe not. But everybody tells me how happy we were and how fantastic our relationship seemed to be. And I ... I can't do anything else than smile and nod, because I don't remember."

"But if you want to remember so badly, the complete opposite will happen. Just relax, take your time and you will see, it all will come back. Don't force yourself."

Greg did not respond to this, he just let Nick pull him in even deeper and finally there was no space left between them.

"Do you have any idea how frustrating it is having Catherine telling you, that she can't remember never having you seen not smile? Or Warrick telling you that he never met anybody so happy in a relationship as us? Even Sara's told me that we must be the two people most in in love on this fucking planet. I'm not sure, but I think I even Grissom made a comment to the nature of our relationship."

"Greg, why do you care so much what other people tell you? Maybe they are all right, but right now that is the most unimportant thing in the world."

"How long will you wait for me?"

"I already waited half my life to find you. I think it won't be that tragic if I have to wait for another couple of months. At least I have you with me." Nick smiled.

Greg tightened his hold on Nick and was rewarded with an even firmer embrace than the one he was already in. A wordless confirmation of that Nick was right. Right now there were far more important things that needed to be taken care of than thinking about what other people might think. And maybe all the people at work just thought that they were helping by telling how great they were together.

As the weeks passed by Nick did what he could to show Greg just how much he loved him and to let him know that he would wait forever. Occasionally Nick would take them on a road trip to a place that meant something special to them. Like the restaurant where their first date took place or the place where they went camping. Greg remembered that he was not really keen on going on a camping trip, but for Nick he would do everything.

Or they would just rent some movies, spending the evening wrapped around each other on the sofa. Things started to get back to normal and it seemed as if Greg started to remember more and more each day, but they still had a long way to go.

And it was during that weeks those Greg started to realize how much Nick would sacrifice for him, that there was nothing that Nick would not do for Greg. And he realized that by now it was the same with him. In the beginning, the first two weeks, it was a strange situation, actually quite surreal, and sort of uncomfortable. He could not remember a thing. Nick telling him he was his boyfriend and all those sort of things. It was just awkward, although he knew that it was neither Nick's nor his fault.

But now, after spending all this time with Nick and seeing how much Nick would do for him and how much he would give up to helping Greg to remember, something had changed. Because somewhere along the way Greg fell in love again, fell in love with Nick. And it was just like he could embrace the whole world.

And it seemed as if it didn't matter that there were still parts he didn't remember. But he knew it was bothering Nick, because he wanted Greg to remember, remember everything about their past.

It was during one of these boring/quite nights in the lab, that Catherine confronted him. .

"So Greg, how are things going between you and Nick?" she asked.

"What do you mean?" Greg asked shocked.

"Nothing... it was just a question. I didn't mean anything by asking, just wanted to know."

"Oh, okay. It's just....I mean everything is alright. It's just... I ... do you know the feeling when everything is actually perfect, but..."

"What is it Greg? What's bothering you? Is there a problem between you and Nicky?"

"Actually...yeah. There is a problem."

"What is it?" Catherine asked, sounding concerned now.

"The problem, Catherine, the problem is me."

"What? I... I don't understand."

"It is ... I can't explain it. You know. Actually everything is great, or it looks like everything is great, but I know how much it bothers Nick. He is covering it good. But as long as I can't remember it all there will always be something between us."

"Don't get me wrong. I know I have no right to interfere with this. But I don't think Nick would ever complain about that. He's just happy having you back in his life the way it was before the accident. I think him not being happy is all in your imagination as well as him having a problem with your lingering amnesia. is a problem for him Remember that Nick is a believer, he believes in people and above all he believes in you and that you'll someday remember again."

"Yeah, he is always positive about everything."

"Just do whatever YOU think is best and the rest will come as well." Catherine said before she left Greg back at the lab.

The rest of the night was spent by thinking. He thought about him and Nick, the past couple of months and how everything had changed. And suddenly a thought occurred to him. Nick and he hadn't gone all the way yet. Greg knew that Nick would never suggest it on his own, he wanted to give Greg as much time as he needed and so he never would push the issue or just start talking about it. So it was up to Greg to start taking things a little further. And he had his whole shift time to figure out how he would do it, because he wanted it to be... special. One way or another it would be their first time, because their actual first time Greg could not remember, so he wanted things to be as perfect as possible, and that did not include arguing with Nick whether or not he was ready in Nick's eyes. And by the end of his shift Greg knew it would be their shared day off. So that meant about 5 days time to 'plan' and make arrangements.

"What are you smiling about?" Nick asked, as he saw Greg back home.

"Nothing...just thought about something." Greg answered, grinning.

"That's never good. That sounds scary. Should I be scared?" Nick teased and smiled.

"Hmmm.... Maybe." Greg grinned back.

"So are you going to tell me what you thought about?"

"Nope, not yet, but you will find out, eventually."

Nick gave Greg a look which was more than just curiosity. It was a mix of affection, curiosity, sort of admiration and maybe lust, but Greg wasn't sure about that one.

And maybe things didn't have to wait five days. Maybe they couldn't even wait until tomorrow.

Greg walked over to Nick, who was sitting on the sofa. He bent down and sealed Nick's lips with his. It was more than just a kiss. It was Greg's way to tell Nick 'I want you... and I want you now.' And Nick seemed to understand, because he pulled Greg down to him and intensified the kiss. When oxygen became an issue and they needed to let go of each others lips, Nick rested his forehead against Greg's and took a deep look into Greg's beautiful brown eyes. And Greg replied the intense look.

"You sure, G?" Nick asked.

"Never have been surer about anything in my life." he said and kissed Nick again. And to his relief it didn't seem like Nick was going to argue his decision.

So when Nick got up and pulled Greg with him, they started to rid each other of their clothes. Leaving a trail which consisted of shirts, jeans', belts, shoes and boxer shorts they finally reached the bedroom.

"Okay, just one last time. Are you sure about this? I'm not going to ask again, but I just need to make sure."

"As I told you, I never have been surer about something. I want it, need it. And I know you want this, too. You have waited for it so long. And don't try to deny it."

"I would wait even longer." Nick said.

And Greg was sure, if he hadn't already fallen head over heels for Nick this would be the time he definitely would. But instead of replying Greg just kissed Nick again and pushed him onto the bed. But instead of just pushing Nick down, his wrists were gripped by Nick's hands and he was pulled down.

He landed on Nick's chest, never loosing contact with those precious lips of Nick. When Nick rolled Greg over and was on top of him Greg just let Nick do whatever he thought he had to do, because Greg knew, Nick would never do anything that Greg would not like.

Nick pinned Greg's hands above his head into the mattress and his kisses became more fierce and eager.

And when Nick started licking trails all across his neck, Greg thought he would die any minute. He didn't but it felt so amazing. And he was quite sure that his moaning and groaning gave Nick the evidence he needed. Nick knew that Greg's earlobes were one of his sensitive spots and that by just nibbling at them you could drive Greg insane. So he decided on moving up again, nibbling at said earlobe and letting his hands roam over Greg's upper torso. Meanwhile Greg's hands decided on travelling down Nick's torso as well.

Letting go of Greg's earlobe his lips brushed slightly Greg's and than started to leaving trails on Greg's chest.

Greg was not sure if he noticed right, but it seemed as if Nick was actually licking patterns on his chest. Circles, squares and other geometrical figures.

"Would you please stop using my chest as some sort of scratch book and move on?" Greg asked.

"What? Is that a complaint?"

"Nick...." Greg whined.

And with that Nick stopped drawing imaginary pictures with his tongue onto Greg's chest and moved further down, towards Greg's thighs. Kissing and nibbling his way further down he noticed Greg becoming more and more impatient. But he wanted to go slow, give Greg time to get used to this if he needed. And he also wanted to drive Greg insane, just the way it used to be.

It seemed to work because Greg was writhing on the bed in all sort of directions and Nick knew that Greg was close to losing it.

Turning Greg onto his stomach, Nick knew that Greg was expecting him to get down to business, but he had not intention of that yet.

Repeating his actions with nibbling at Greg's earlobe and moving to kiss paths across Greg's back, paying special attention to all the little scars left by the lab explosion.

And again he could hear Greg moaning, groaning and actually purring.

And that was the moment Nick decided to spread butterfly kisses across Greg's whole backside. Starting from the neck, traveling over tip, Greg knew that he would be able to hold on much longer.

He enjoyed the feeling of Nick's tongue on his dick and the heat of Nick's mouth, all in all he loved Nick going down on him

And then Nick swallowed him whole and he sucked slightly. That did him in and Greg shot his whole load, letting Nick milk the last drops from him and lick him clean.

Greg was in a trance like state, gone to another place, if not even sphere, only his breathing indicating that he was still there and alive.

Nick wasn't sure if he should continue or if he should just leave it at that. But Greg was back with him within moments.

And Nick to ask if they should stop, when Greg took the lube and handed it to Nick. That was the whole back from left to right and back to the left side and finishing at Greg's buttocks. At that point Greg managed to roll back onto his back and Nick got the 'I can't wait any longer' look.

Nick's left hand let go of Greg and went for the drawer on the bedside and reached for the lube stored in there. And while his chest was bent over Greg, Greg decided on locking his lips to it. Nibbling at Nick's nipple and leaving wet trails. He noticed how Nick seemed to be surprised about the attack and forgot for a moment what he was looking for in the drawer. Nick grabbed the lube, tossed it on the bed and sealed Greg's lips with his again.

It seemed as none of them could get enough of the other ones lips. And when Nick pushed one of his knees between Greg's legs, Greg was more than happy to comply. And again Nick started to kiss and nibble his way downwards. Greg had closed his eyes, knowing it would come every minute now, the contact of Nick's lips with his cock. And indeed... just a couple of moments later he felt wet lips surrounding his cock. Greg arched up into the sensation and he already knew he wouldn't last long, because it was just too long since he last felt this sort of sensation. So he tried to relax, tried to make the moment last as long as possible. So when Nick started licking from the base to the all he needed. Nick took the tube and opened it. He squeezed some of its content onto his fingers and started to prepare Greg. Soon he had Greg writhing on the bed again loud as ever. But he had to be careful, it had been five months since they'd last done it and as expected Greg was tight and slow to relax, despite his obvious willingness. Nick took his time and only began the scissoring when the two fingers slid easily in and out. One thing that hadn't changed for sure was his ability to drive Greg crazy while prepping him.

When Nick was up to three fingers Greg was practically thrashing about like a mad man.

Pouring some more lube onto his fingers and covering his cock with it Nick lined himself up against Greg's opening. With one smooth, slow thrust he inserted him and rested to give Greg time to adjust. But when Greg arched of off the bed trying to take him deeper, Nick knew he had to start moving or Greg would injure himself.

And so he thrust in and out of Greg, in slow and smooth movements. Along the way his lips found Greg's again and they shared a passionate kiss. And when Nick whispered into Greg's ear things like 'I love you so much, baby' and 'You are so wonderful' Greg felt like they were be the only people on this planet.

The brush of abs against his cock had Greg hard again and Nick weren't slow to wrap a hand around it. With each thrust Nick stroked Greg's cock, guiding him straight forward into his second orgasm of the night. And if the second should be just as intense as the first one was then Greg might black out.

For each thrust he felt the tension build and he knew he was close to coming again, but he also sensed that Nick was reaching his high. When Greg climaxed for the second time that night, Nick heard the sweet words of 'love you Nicky' and 'never felt anything like this'. The tight heat and the declaration of love brought him to his own climax and screaming Greg's name he came and collapsed on Greg's chest.

After a couple of moments Nick withdrew himself from Greg and noticed the mumbled protest from Greg overt the loose of contact. He rolled himself next to Greg and slung his arms around the torso of the other man.

"You alright?" Nick finally asked.

"Oh my goodness me. That was just...completely... I can't believe it." Greg stuttered in a way that was just cute and adorable.

"Sorry for asking, but did you actually black out before?"

"Yeah, I guess. Can't remember doing that before. "Greg said, grinning.

"Me neither. We'll just take this as a good sign. So I guess you are happy."

"Yes, your little sunshine is very happy indeed." Greg said, smiling. Nick sat up abruptly and stared at Greg.

"What did you just say?" he asked.

"I said that I'm happy, very happy. Why? Shouldn't I be?" Greg asked confused.

"No, no that's not what I meant. It's ... it's just... you said 'your little sunshine'."

"Yeah, sure, that's what you call me. 'Your little sunshine'. Because I smile so much."

"Oh my God, you remember! You just used my ... special name for you ... sunshine." Nick's surprised face morphed into the biggest smile he possessed and excitement washed through him.

"Now that you say it. I do! I remember." Greg was so ecstatic that if it wasn't for Nick's hand touching his face, he was certain he would have been floating.

Greg leaned into the touch, closed his eyes and let Nick pull him closer. Until he suddenly was overcome with the need to laugh.

"What's so funny, baby?" Nick wanted to know.

"It's just .... I'd done some thinking."

"Yeah, I get that and that's wonderful."

"I mean about you and me, you know?"

"And?"

"I...thought ... there was something between the two of us. Something that made you unhappy."

"Greg, how can I possibly be unhappy when I'm with you?"

"I just thought... you know... by... that... you...," Greg stuttered, blushing awfully and burying his face in Nick's chest.

"Greg, what are you trying to say?" Nick asked, trying to figure out what Greg had tried to say. And suddenly it hit Nick.

"Are you trying to tell me that you thought sleeping with me would make me happy? Well, given that I was unhappy before."

"It's not like.... I mean... I sort of planned... you know....but..."Greg stuttered again.

"Greg... deep breaths, slow down and start again, baby." Nick said, noticing how nervous Greg got.

"Okay well Catherine talked to me and she ..." Greg started to tell Nick about the previous night and his conversation with Catherine and how he felt and that he thought taking that last step would help them both.

"Help? I don't need help, babe. The only thing I need is you and I don't need you in some sort of 'satisfying my needs' kinda way. I want you the way you are, babe. And not some Greg who does things just because he thinks I want him to do so, certainly not somebody just doing things because he thinks that's what I want him to do."

Nick said looking down on Greg framing the beautiful face with his hands. Greg responded by his classic apologizing smile.

"I'm sorry...but...you know, on the other hand I also thought...given this was our first time, because I can't remember the actual first time... that it should be..."

"Perfect?" Nick asked smiling and Greg nodded.

"So I sort of ruined your plan?" Nick asked.

"I wouldn't say ruin... and in hindsight, I honestly don't think I could've planned it to this level of perfection."

"Uh, wise words." Nick said giving Greg a big smile. He then laid down again next to Greg pulling the covers over them. He wrapped his strong arms around Greg and kissed his hair.

It would be a another couple of weeks before Greg would fully remember everything about him and Nick and what they'd had before the accident, but he would come to remember.

It would remain a mystery why it had taken so long for him to remember that part of his life. But in all honesty Greg was okay with it, some might even go as far to say happy, because it had given him all the firsts a second time. Their first kiss, their first date and of course their first lovemaking.

And the fact that Nick and Greg managed this sometimes quite difficult times just brought them even closer to each other, because they were quite sure, if not even amnesia could part them than nothing in this world co The fact that Nick and Greg managed those difficult months only brought them closer and gave them the certainty that when amnesia could take them apart, nothing in this world could.

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