TITLE: Turtlenecks for All Occasions
AUTHOR: Clockstopper
RATING: R
PAIRING: Nick/Greg
DISTRIBUTION: Currently playing on 'What Makes a Desert Beautiful: Nick/Greg archive'. You want just ask! Tell me where my baby's going though.
DISCLAIMER: Okay I don't own these characters. If I did there would have been some very tasteful threesomes between a certain bleached blonde vampire, a broody vampire and a smart mouthed glorified bricklayer.
SPOILERS: Not really

*******

The detectives noticed first. I think Brass was the first one to say anything about it. The rest of them were, and this is pure stipulation on my part, afraid to ask cause they thought I'd mess up the crime scene if they distracted me with too much talk.

Brass, being one to not care about peoples personal privacy, made a comment about it first. I know he did I remember it clear as day. It wasn't even really a comment he just sort of looked at me in a knowing way and I knew what he was thinking.

He opened the floodgates though. Soon Vega and O'Riley were making their own comments and looking all smug about something and I just knew they were talking about me. Even Lockwood had made some not so discreet innuendoes before he died.

And now these new guys, Vartann and Cavaliere make their comments too. It's really annoying when you think about it. Can't a person just like to wear turtlenecks?

Apparently not in this world or this society or whatever. It's just not possible. And okay I'll cut them a little slack for the fact that this is Vegas and I guess turtlenecks are a little unheard of here, but it does get cold some times.

And I work the night shift so my choice in clothing is perfectly fine. Sara and Grissom don't seem to notice. Neither do Warrick and Catherine, so I guess it's just a detective thing.

Or at least I thought it was a detective thing. I remember I entered the break room that day, the Lab Rats must have been having a convention or meeting of the minds or something, because there they were Jacqui, Archie, Bobby, Hodges and Greg all sitting there drinking Greg's special coffee looking at me with a little too much interest.

"So when are you gonna tell us about the girlfriend, Nick." Jacqui said as a poured my coffee.

"What girlfriend?" I asked as innocently as I could manage.

"The one that causes you to sport a turtleneck every other week." Hodges said snidely as he sipped on his coffee. I was pretty sure Greg hadn't shared with him considering they hated each other.

"Don't know what you're talking about man. It was pretty cold tonight." Nick said.

"Yeah, but Nick I once saw you wearing a turtleneck through a heat wave." Bobby said.

At this point I'm trying real hard not to blush or do anything that would give me away. So I turn to them all of them staring at me with wide eyes waiting for the answer. They would just love to start the rumor mills.

"There's no girlfriend. Like I said it was cold. And so I like to wear turtlenecks. They're pretty comfortable." I said.

"Nick everybody knows why one wears a turtleneck. They're to cover up things that would insinuate that you have a life outside of the lab." Jacqui said.

"Yeah I mean my girlfriend gets a little... but she's never given me a hickey before." Archie said.

"Good going there Archie we were about to have a whole conversation concerning Nick's sex life in euphemisms. Just tell them who the girl is and give them a few details to satisfy their nosing minds. All there guessing is giving me a migraine." Hodges said in an overly dramatically dull voice.

"There's no girl. You guys can just put away your thoughts now." I said.

"Yeah guys if there was a girl don't you think he'd admit to it. I mean if it were me and I had a hot girl that liked to paw all over me I wouldn't want to keep that a secret." Greg said smirk on his face.

Jacqui rolled her eyes at him.

"That's the difference between you and Nick. Nick's actually mature enough to keep his life private and not feel the need to brag. Besides there's a little something called professionalism." She said to him.

Greg just shrugged his shoulders and went back to his coffee.

"Exactly so even if I had a girlfriend... which I'm not saying I do, but if I did, I wouldn't tell you because I like to keep things like that private." I said.

"Yes, but you have to tell us." Jacqui said.

"And why is that?" I asked.

"Because, we Lab Rats have such few highlights. Gossip is just one thing that gets us through the day." Jacqui said.

"He's probably telling the truth. Maybe he gave himself a hickey so that we could all be talking about it and he can get his laughs watching us scurry." Greg said.

"Greg, you're a smart guy and I'll be the first one to admit that, but how in the hell do you give yourself a hickey... on the neck?" Bobby asked staring at Greg like he just discovered exactly how weird Greg could be.

"With a vacuum. You just put the hose part up to your neck and..." Archie stopped his explanation at the weird stares he was getting.

"What I heard it some where." Archie said as he slid down in his seat.

There were a few moments of silence before Hodges got up sarcastic smile on his face.

"Well as much fun as this conversation isn't, I think I'm going to try and get some actual work done." He said heading off with his coffee in hand.

"You know for a stuck up snub he's got a point." I said.

"You can't leave. We're not done questioning you." Jacqui said.

Jacqui, and this is from my personal experience, can be one scary lady when she wants to be and I was thankful that Grissom paged me when he did. I ran out of there as fast as I could without making a scene.

So now I'm getting home after a long shift and it turns out it really wasn't that cold tonight and I'm sweating. I pull off my shirt and pick up one that's just lying on the ground and slide it over my head. I walk into the kitchen and there's Greg listening to his iPod, yes he's such a kid I can't believe he bought himself and iPod, and pouring some cereal, Froot Loops as if he'd eat anything else.

I swear he could eat those things morning, noon and night. He's in a white shirt- my white shirt- and a pair of striped boxers. He's dancing a little to the beat of whatever music he's listening to.

Not one to pass up golden opportunities when they present themselves I sneak up behind him and wrap my arms around his waist. He jumps at first then turns a little to see it was me. He smiles up at me and pulls the earphones out of his ears.

"Those are really noticeable." Is the first thing he says to me as he fingers the red marks on my neck.

"You should know. You put them there." I say teasingly.

"Yeah, but I didn't realize how hard I was sucking until now... you know now that I see them." He says as he turns in my arms. I place a light kiss on his lips and he smiles.

"I tell you all the time to go easy or at the very least suck somewhere that isn't going to be noticeable, but you insist on the high part of my neck." I say.

And it's true. Greg gets wild and you can't say anything to him when he's like that. He won't hear you. He's the reason for all the turtlenecks and he knows it.

"That's the first time they've questioned me. I mean sure all the detectives think I'm getting seriously laid, but no one in the lab has ever said anything about it." I say.

"Yeah, Jacqui was asking me a couple of times about you. How come you never seem to have a girlfriend you know stuff like that. Tried to keeping your revolving door image intact, but she got suspicious and questioned everyone else. You know how she can be." Greg says.

"You know an easy solution to my turtleneck problem is you not sucking on my neck like a vampire." I say and I tickle his sides a bit so he knows that I'm not serious. He laughs and squirms in my arms.

"Sorry I can't help it that when we make made passionate love that I get a little... passionate." Greg says silly smile on his face.

"You know people are starting to talk. I can't keep wearing turtlenecks, Greg. They leave me all sweaty and smelly." I say. He buries his face in my neck and sniffs a bit.

"Hmmm... nothing wrong with a sweaty Nick you know." He says in that low seductive hum that did me in in the first place.

"Greg I'm serious, what if Grissom starts to ask questions?" I ask.

"What's he going to do, demand that you take of your shirt for an inspection. That could be qualified as sexual harassment, Nicky." Greg says and he's smiling like a madman.

"Can you be serious for a few seconds?" I ask.

"I can be a lot of things, Nicky." He says and there's that seductive voice again. He uses it as a weapon I know he does. I sigh.

"Okay, okay. This is me being serious. Nick, we've been dating for what a few years now. Maybe two. Living together for close to a year. No one's noticed yet." Greg says.

"That was borrowed time man. Now that the techs noticed it's only a matter of time before Sara and Catherine start asking me questions." Nick said.

"They already do, Nick. Come on now, everyone wants to know what's going on in everyone's life. It's human nature. They aren't going to stop asking until you start telling them everything and by that time there not going to want to know anymore." Greg says.

"That's some weird logic, G."

"Yes, well I never said I qualified as normal. I thought it was one of the reasons you loved me." Greg says and now he's pouting.

Greg pouting does not bode well for me because when he pouts I'm ready to give up just about anything so that he stops pouting. A pouting Greg means a sad Greg which leads to an angry crabby Greg which leads to a no sex for Nick Greg. Funny how dating someone for as long as me and Greg have dated allows you to figure out their moods.

"Oh I love you for a lot more than that." I say and I bend down and start kissing Greg's neck. Greg squirms in my arms and I know he's trying to say he wants to go to the bedroom.

My hands make their way to Greg's boxers and I push them down a bit. My hand makes its way to his half-hard cock and a stroke it lightly teasing the head slightly.

"Shit, Nicky, we really should..."

"Shh, just feel this." I whisper in his ear and lightly suck on his earlobe before going back to his neck.

Greg's great like this. When we have sex he's always throwing himself into it letting himself just go in the sheer ecstasy of it all. He just let's me take control.

Like right now he probably wanted to fight me on it, but just a few strokes and well placed touches of my hands and mouth and he's bucking against me not caring that we're standing in the kitchen and his Froot Loops are getting soggy. That's one he'll care about later when we're through. Greg loves his Froot Loops.

I could never be Greg let myself go like that letting someone have control like that. I guess that's why me and Greg get along so well and have been together so long. We complement each other like Greg has said so many times before. And he gets a little antsy with all the hiding, but he understands why.

It's not just that it puts are jobs at risk or that I'm afraid to get out of the closet. I never once told people that I'm straight although before Greg I thought I was mostly straight, and though I've never dissuaded people from thinking otherwise I've never walked around the lab screaming I'm straight. It's a thing about privacy. I lived with six other siblings and I never had a single ounce of privacy so I guess I'm making up for that now.

It also has to do with Greg making it in the field. It's like the one thing he wants the most and I know that. If he made it out in the field things could get a little sticky with our relationship being what it is. I love him and he knows it and for now he says that that's all there needs to be.

So here we are after shift my hand jerking him off and my mouth sucking on his neck and he's clawing and my back making those little noise he loves to make when I've got him at me mercy and me with at least four red marks on my neck and more on my back. I wouldn't trade in my life for anything even if it meant being condemned to turtlenecks for the rest of my life.

"Holy fuck... Nicky I'm gonna..." Greg grabs a hold of hair and pulls a bit.

I stroke him just a little more before Greg lets out a low moan that could be a scream if he wasn't biting on his lip and I feel the sticky substance of Greg's cum on my hands. He sags against me spent for the moment his head resting on my shoulder as he breaths heavily.

"That's gonna leave a mark." I say.

"Huh." He says as coherently as he can manage.

"That hickey... it's pretty big." He lifts himself off me and looks me in the eyes. "

Nick, you don't... oh shit." He says and suddenly he's got massive amounts of energy because he twists in my arms and runs to the bathroom.

I follow behind him slowly and smile when I hear him yell 'You sneak asshole'. When I get to the bathroom he turns on looks at me accusingly.

There high up on his neck too high to be covered by one of his funky collared shirts is a bright red mark that indicates a hickey.

"You... you don't even like... how could you..."

"Can I help it if I get lost in the passion too sometimes?" I saw with a grin on my face.

"Oh, you planned this. You so planned this. Got me all hot and bothered and gave me a hand job so you could exact revenge on me." Greg says.

"Hmmm... it's not that bad. I mean you can cover it up easily." I say as I gather him in my arms.

"I don't even own a turtleneck, Nick." He says pout on his face.

I really hate that pout. Makes me do things I normally wouldn't. I kiss him lightly and pull him closer.

"Well, then you'll just have to wear one of mine."

I don't even have to look down to see him smiling.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

I'm sitting in the break room listening to Catherine chat with Sara about Lindsey and Warrick chat with Grissom about something and Jacqui, Bobby and Archie talk about lab things while Hodges sits in the corner looking at us with disdain.

I've been feeling a little antsy since me and Greg left this morning. I'm in another turtleneck and I see the stares that Jacqui, Bobby and Archie are giving me. Even Hodges looks slightly interested. Shift is about to start and I don't know where Greg is, but I know that he's probably waiting for all of us to be in here before he makes his big entrance.

So when it's two minutes before shift has to start it's not surprise that Greg skips into the break room ready to make a pot of coffee in his usual slacks and lab coat and my turtleneck. It's big on him... really big on him noticeably big because they're always a little baggy on me. And it's my favorite one too. One I've worn a few times when I was in his predicament.

"Hello everybody." Greg says and he's practically floating around the break room as he makes his coffee.

Everybody's looking at him oddly noticing Greg's choice of attire. Took them long enough they only had to have it standing in their face.

"Oh my god! How could we not have figured this out!" Jacqui practically yells. Archie looks dumbfounded and Bobby seems to be smiling somewhat.

"Oh please, how could you have not. The flirtatious banter, the fact that they have to be so close to each other. The fact that Nick actually puts up with his arrogant overtures and elaborate explanations." Hodges says. Greg glares at him.

"Thank you Hodges." He says snidely.

Hodges glares back and sarcastically says, "No problem."

Greg comes and sits down by me.

"Wait I'm confused... Greg's wearing Nick's turtleneck right." Sara says.

"Nice of you to join us Sara." Hodges says.

"Why is Greg wearing your turtleneck?" Sara asks me.

"Oh because yesterday Nick thought it would be great revenge on me if he gave me a really big..." I cover Greg's mouth before he can utter every little detail about our personal lives.

"Greg and I are... dating. Have been for awhile. He put on my shirt today cause all his ugly ones were dirty." I say.

Everyone's silent for a little while. Then Catherine breaks the silence.

"Okay, pay up." She says facing Warrick who has a weary look on his face.

"You just had to go and date him Nicky. Okay, okay you don't need to hassle me here's your money." Warrick said pulling out two twenties.

"Wow... how come you didn't tell me." Sara says to Greg.

"Or me." Jacqui says.

"Oh because my little Nicky Wicky didn't want anyone to know about us." Greg says and he kisses my check.

"Okay I draw the line at public displays of affection. I'm going to work." Hodges says. Everyone starts to ask questions before Grissom whistles and gets everyone's attention.

"I think Hodges was right. We should be getting to work... now." Grissom says and everyone scurries along to get to work. Me and Greg are about to scurry too when Grissom stops us.

"I expect you guys to... keep this under wraps." Grissom says.

"Uh huh of course. We can do that. We've been doing it for two years now." I say. Grissom smiles at us.

"Good. That of course means no making out in the lab." He says. I blush a little, but Greg seems totally unaffected.

Grissom starts to walk away, but then turns around suddenly and looks as thought he were thinking about something, but didn't know how to phrase it.

"Guys... no I know I... your private life isn't any of my business, but maybe you could stop with you know..." he gestures to our shirts and I think I know what he's saying.

"We'll try and work on the turtlenecks, Gris." I say.

"Good, although seems like you're prepared. How many turtlenecks do you have Nick?" He asks and this is a very awkward conversation.

"Um... more then I can keep count of."

FIN