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Title: Darkening of the Light
By: Stacy L.A. Stronach
Pairing: Tony/Gibbs & Abby/Caitlyn
Fandom: NCIS
Rating: R
A/N: This was originally posted in December 2005 and is set post Twilight.
Warning: Character Death
Summary: The team reacts to Caitlyn Todd's murder.

***

"Shine on friend, good night
Why then the darkening of the light?"
Darkening of the light—Concrete Blonde

"And it's hours of forever running all together
Like the crossroads of a minute and you and me were in it
And I never saw it coming never saw it fade away"
Days and days—Concrete Blonde

They recover at the same moment, both men dropping to the roof. Both knowing that had Ari Haswari really wanted either of them dead, they'd be with Cait in the after world by now.

Moving behind the meagre cover offered on the roof, Gibbs whipped out his phone, while Tony spoke to Tim on their mike system. "Cait's dead, McGee," he said flatly.

"What? DiNozzo, if this is a joke—"

"No joke, Tim. She's dead; Ari got her, one shot to her forehead. Wait there for Ducky and bring him up."

Tony listened as Gibbs talked to Director Morrow; he could hear both sides of the conversation.

"…lost Agent Todd, sir. Ari took her out from a building across the street."

"What? She's dead?"

"Yes, Ari assassinated her. Send Ducky, now."

"Of course, Jethro. I'll inform everyone here and I'll send Agent Yates with a team. You are not investigating this."

"Yes, sir. I'd like to…I am going to inform her parents, sir."

"Understood. The team is already on their way."

Gibbs hung up the phone and stood up. Hell if Ari wanted to take him out, he would've already. Heading over to where Cait's lifeless body lay, Gibbs noticed Tony following him. Gibbs sat down beside her, on her left side, Tony on her right. They waited for Ducky.

Down on the street, Tim sat at the back of the car, still in shock. Cait…dead. It was the first time that an agent he knew well had been killed. Closing his eyes, he tried to keep the tears back; it would have to wait.

"Timothy," Ducky said quietly, knowing the younger agent hadn't heard their arrival.

Tim opened his eyes and stared at Ducky for a moment before standing up. "They're on the roof." He saw Jimmy struggling with the gurney. "I'll help you with that."

Walking through the door of the roof, Ducky turned and saw a sight so forlorn it almost broke his heart. He could make out Caitlin's too still form, and flanking her were Jethro and Anthony, both men staring at the building across the road. *Must be where Ari shot her from* he thought angrily. Ducky had been angry at Ari for what he did to Gerald…now, if that bastard were in front of him, Ducky would kill him, stone cold.

Ducky slowly made his way over to the trio, with Palmer and McGee behind him. Tony and Jethro stood when they saw him approach. Neither man spoke as Tony moved to stand beside Gibbs and Ducky knelt beside Cait. "Oh, Caitlin, my dear child," he whispered, stroking the side of her face softly. Then he began his preliminary inspection.

While they waited, Cassie Yates and her team arrived. She walked over to Jethro. "I'm sorry, Gibbs," she said. "I know Morrow told you I'd be leading the case. But you know I will certainly accept your help."

Gibbs nodded. "Thanks, Cassie." He knew it was SOP in this sort of situation and he trusted Yates to do a thorough job.

"This is my team," she said. "Tom Takimora, Joe Shultz and Maria Hernendez," she introduced them. Then, starting with Gibbs she identified his team. "The deceased is Special Agent Caitlin Todd. I'll need initial statements from you all and then we'll do follow up back at the office," Cassie explained, looking at Gibbs. He nodded his agreement to her plan.

While her agents interviewed the other team, Cassie went over, kneeling down beside Ducky. "What have we got, Dr. Mallard?"

The interviews finished quickly and Gibbs fought the feelings of helplessness. He knew that Ari would be long gone by now. *You can run you bastard, but you can't hide from me forever* he thought.

"DiNozzo, I'm going to call Cait's parents."

"Boss, her parents are in town. They came down for a vacation to visit her; they're staying at her place. Do you want me to come with you?" Tony asked.

"No. They've got to process you, DiNozzo. And it's my responsibility," Jethro said. They would have to get pictures of Tony and this was something he had to do alone. "I'll meet you back at the office."

********************

Gibbs drove to Cait's apartment, marshalling his thoughts and emotions. He could grieve for her later, after this was done, after the reports were done. Knowing that he could only be finished with this once Ari was dead.

Standing outside Cait's door, Gibbs hated this duty but he would fulfill. He rang the doorbell and it was opened seconds later by a woman who looked like an older version of Cait. "Mrs. Todd?" he asked. At her nod, he continued. "I'm Special Agent Jethro Gibbs, NCIS. I need to speak with you and your husband.

"Of course, Agent Gibbs, come in. Cait has told us so much about you. Why isn't she with you?" Mrs. Todd asked.

Cait's father, a tall, heavy-set man took one look at Gibbs' face and he knew something was wrong. "Catherine, let him speak. I'm Charlie Todd, Cait's father."

At her husband's tone, Catherine looked from one man to the other and fear showed in her face. "No," she whispered.

Gibbs spoke steadily and quietly. "Mr. and Mrs. Todd, I deeply regret to inform you that your daughter, Special Agent Caitlin Todd, was killed in the line of duty today. We were on an operation to stop an Al-Queda attack on Navy families. I am truly sorry for your loss; she was one of the best agents I've had the privilege of working with. If there's anything I can do…"

Before had finished speaking, Catherine had turned to her husband's embrace, a keening cry of loss her only reply. Charlie Todd barely maintained his composure. "She died protecting…saving others?" At Gibbs' curt nod, he closed his eyes momentarily. "Then she…I…" he couldn't continue.

"I'll go now, sir. I'm sorry and, I know it's not much, but if there is anything at all I can do for you, please let me know," Gibbs said.

"Thank you, Agent Gibbs," Charlie said before turning his attention back to his wife.

Gibbs left, closing the door behind him.

 

*******************
McGee sat at his desk, trying to work on his report. He was still shaken by this whole thing. Being shot at, losing Cait…she was the first agent he had worked with that had died. He'd gone down to see Abby, but she'd sent him away, wanting to be alone. Tony was getting cleaned up and Gibbs hadn't come back yet from telling Cait's parents. He looked down at his hands, which were hovering over the keyboard and shaking; he sniffled, trying not to cry. Deep in his heart, he was glad he hadn't been on the rooftop, glad that he hadn't ended up with her blood all over his face and clothes.

He leaned his elbows on his desk, covering his face with his hands. This was almost surreal. Cait had been like an older sister—she teased him, ganged up with Tony on him sometimes…but other times they'd turned the tables on Tony. He'd learned a lot about being a good agent from her. Tim lifted his head squared his shoulders and focussed on writing his report, he needed distraction.

When he finished, he sat there, staring into space and when he felt the tears start…he didn't try to stop them this time. She would never come back, never walk off that elevator again….

"Tim, go home," Gibbs said quietly.

Tim jumped not having heard his boss approach. He quickly wiped his eyes grabbed a tissue and blew his nose. "I'm sorry, Gibbs, I'll be okay, we need to work on this—"

"It will wait. It's been a long day. Go home, take some time…work will still be here tomorrow," Gibbs said. "And crying is not a sign of weakness."

"I'll be fine—"

"Hey, Tim, do as the man says, okay?" Tony said, coming up on Tim's other side. "Have you talked to Abby?"

Tim shrugged sadly. "I tried but she sent me away…" he said.

"I'll go down to see her. Go home, Tim," Tony replied, and then leaned closer and continued. "And if you need to talk, call me, okay?"

Tim sighed in defeat. Going home sounded really good, he hoped Gibbs wouldn’t think he was weak for doing so.

"Oh, McGee, is Ducky back yet?" Gibbs asked as the younger man headed for the door.

"Yeah. He said he was going to start the…. On Cait."

"Thanks. See you tomorrow."

"Bye, Boss."

Gibbs sighed, before heading to the elevators. Tony was going down to look in on Abby. He was going to go down and see Ducky.

*****************

"Jimmy, could you please find something else to do?" Ducky ordered quietly. At the younger man's confused look, he said, "I'll do this one alone, please."

Nodding his understanding, Jimmy pushed the instrument tray into place and headed for the doors. As he opened it, he turned and said, "I'm really sorry, Dr. Mallard."

"As am I, lad. Thank you." He waited until Jimmy had left, the reached out to gently stroke Cait's hair. "My poor, dear girl. You had just started to really live your life, to be happy and who you were meant to be," he stopped when he heard the doors open and turned his head to see Jethro walking in.

"Jethro, please leave."

"I want to be here for this."

"No. It's out of the question. You'll gain nothing from it, and more importantly, I do NOT want an audience. Leave. NOW!" Ducky said, raising his voice.

Gibbs was about to protest but something in the older man's manner stopped him. "Okay, Ducky. I want the report though."

"And you shall have it when it's ready. Now go."

Turning around Gibbs left the autopsy room and headed for Abby's lab.

Ducky watched Gibbs leave, and turned his attention back to Cait. "Alone again, my dear. I'll be as gentle as I possibly can. And I'll be very thorough. I'm going to miss you, Caitlin Todd…you were like a daughter to me; you and Abby both," he said. Leaning over, he kissed her forehead just above the fatal wound. "You do know that Jethro and Tony and the rest of us will do our best to make Ari pay for what he's done. We'll look after Abby for you, too," Ducky finished as he picked up the scalpel to make the Y incision.

*******************

Tony hurried down to the lab after he'd helped to convince McGee to go home. Walking in, he saw Abby standing by her desk, just staring into space.

Walking up beside her, he whispered, "Abby?"

She turned her head and looked at him, her blue eyes shining with unshed tears. "Oh, God, Tony. I dreamt that you had blood on your face, I thought it was yours, I didn't know it was hers…" Abby trailed off and burst into tears.

He wrapped his arms around her, offering what little comfort he could. "Oh, Abs, I'm so sorry, so, so sorry," he murmured against her hair. Even as she sobbed her pain, Tony held tightly onto his own, knowing that he could wait, she didn't need his grief on top of her own.

When her sobs trailed off into hiccupping and tears, Tony shuffled them over to a chair sitting down and pulling Abby onto his lap. Sitting down, she put one arm around his shoulders, laying her head on his shoulder, while her other grasped his hand. When she could finally speak, her voice was raspy. "You know her parents were down…she brought me over to meet them, I was so worried. Meeting her parents made us seem, I dunno, officially girlfriends or something. She was really surprised at how well they took the whole thing…they're very strong Catholics but they told her…They told her if she was happy, if we were, that was what was important. Cait was so shocked by it, I was just happy…" she trailed off as fresh tears slid down her face. "We'd just had our first anniversary…we were gonna move in together, she even seemed willing to at least think about getting married…we both wanted kids, you know. Oh, god, what am I gonna do?" Abby shouted the last holding on tighter to Tony.

He stroked her hair and didn't speak for a few moments. "I have no words Abby…I just know we all loved her…and we all love you…and if you need any of us, we're here for you," Tony said against her ear.

"DiNozzo is right for the second time today," Gibbs said, startling them both. He'd known about Abby and Cait and while it wasn't officially sanctioned, they'd been very discreet so he hadn't had to do anything.

He reached out and rubbed her back, before kneeling and sliding the arm around her. She wrapped her free arm around his neck and he reached forward and kissed her cheek. "I know this is hard for you, Abby, but you will survive. You're strong. It'll hurt for a while, but you'll make it, for your sake…for Cait's sake, okay?"

Abby squeezed Gibbs and Tony close to her, sniffling and crying. "Thank you, Jethro…and Tony. I just hurt so much now…life sucks, life just is SO not fair…," she whispered. They stayed that way for a few minutes, then Abby spoke again. "I…I need to go home, need to talk to her parents…Bossman, can I—"

Jethro moved and helped her stand up. "Go, Abby and take as much leave as you need. You're covered."

Tony stood up and Abby gave first him, then Gibbs one last hug before gathering her things and leaving.

Tony closed his eyes for a moment, then took a deep breath. "Has Ducky finished…?"

"He's started, wouldn't let me stay."

Nodding, Tony didn't say anything. Finally Jethro spoke. "McGee's gone home…you should go too, Tony. You look like shit."

"You leaving yet?" he asked.

"Nope, got reports to finish."

"Then in that case, I'll stay and help you out," Tony replied, his tone indicating that it would be useless for Gibbs to argue with him.

******************

Abby took a cab home, not trusting herself to drive in the state she was in. Her car would be safe where it was. On the ride home her thoughts drifted back to this morning, her last morning with the woman she'd loved so deeply.

"How cool were your parents, Cait? From the way you talked, I was sure they'd blow their gaskets!" Abby said pulling on the last of her jewellery.

Cait laughed. "I know, I was so shocked. I'm glad they're accepting of us, but it's still like I'm in some weird universe. You know how hard it was for me to acknowledge how I felt, about what I am. But I'm so glad now," she said, straightening her clothes.

She squeaked when Abby hugged her from behind, kissing her neck. "Abby, we've got to get to work, we don't want to be late!" she said, turning around in her lover's arms.

"Ah, c'mon, we've got time for one more kiss, sweetie," Abby said, claiming Cait's mouth for a passionate, long, wet kiss.

They finally pulled apart, both of them breathless, both of them smiling. "I love you, Abigail."

"I love you, Caitlin," Abby said, slowly lowering her arms. "I guess we'd better head out."

Abby sighed, wiping at the fresh tears in her eyes as the cab pulled to a stop in front of her building. She paid the cabbie, then almost ran to her apartment. Going inside, she dropped her stuff by the door, walking slowly through her place, seeing Cait's touch everywhere. Finally, she went into the bedroom, looking at the unmade bed where they'd made love for what turned out to be the last time, early this morning. Stripping down to her underwear, Abby fell onto the bed, pulling Cait's pillow into her arms, shoving her face into it, trying to capture the essence of her lover.

******************

Two hours later, Tony sat at his desk watching Gibbs watching Cait's desk. The reports were finished; Ducky had stopped by earlier to give a copy of his preliminary findings to Jethro. No big surprises; cause of death: single gunshot to the head, death was instantaneous.

"Go home, DiNozzo," Gibbs said roughly.

"Not until you go, Boss," he replied. "You gonna clean out her desk?"

Unsure until Tony asked, Gibbs nodded his head yes. He got up and walked over to sit in her chair, behind her desk. Tony rolled his chair over to sit across from him, handing him two boxes. At Gibbs' questioning look, Tony shrugged. "One for Abby, one for her parents."

Gibbs nodded, then handed Cait's PDA to Tony. "Download case file information then erase everything on it."

Tony did as he was asked. They worked steadily, making sure nothing surprising would end up with her parents. Both men knew that Abby would be surprised by nothing Cait might have had. An hour later, they were finished.

Jethro looked at Tony, shaking his head. "Tony, please, go home, you look ready to drop," he said.

"So do you and I'm not going until you do…" he trailed off, uncertainty showing on his face. Then he sat a little straighter. He'd say what he wanted and the result would be…the result. "Jethro. I don't want to be alone tonight," he said quietly.

Tilting his head as he looked at the younger man, a small smile played on his face. "I don't want to be alone either. Come home with me…call that Chinese food place you like and we'll get some take out." He held up his hand to stave off Tony's protest. "I'm not that hungry either, but we've got to eat."

"Okay," he said simply. Both men grabbed their gear and Tony called for the food on the way down to the parking garage.

As Jethro drove to the restaurant, Tony found his thought slipping back to Cait's last moments. He wiped the side of his face, wondering how long he'd feel her blood there. Cait had become the sister that Tony had never had. They tormented each other mercilessly, sometimes going over that edge and hurting one another. But they always forgave each other. He'd loved her, and although he'd pretended interest in sleeping with her, he knew he would never have done it. Not because she was ugly, far from it, she'd been beautiful, but because he liked the way they'd been. It had really hit home for him how much she cared for him, when he'd had the pneumonic plague. Tony knew he would miss her…he knew there'd always be a Cait-shaped hole in his heart.

*****************

When they got back to Jethro's place, he sent Tony into the living room while he grabbed some beer out of the fridge, and some silverware for Tony.

Jethro made his way to the living room, setting the drinks down on the table, where Tony already had the food opened. Sitting next to Tony, Jethro grabbed a carton of food and started eating. He grunted in surprise when he saw Tony deftly managing to eat with the chopsticks.

Tony smiled, sadly. "She taught me. One night when I was on leave, she and Abby came over…Cait finally took pity on me…" he paused, tears distorting his vision. "Damnit! I'm going to miss her!" he shouted, throwing the carton on the table. "Damnit!"

Jethro set his food down, reached an arm around Tony, pulling the other man closer. He wasn't surprised to feel Tony's arms wrap around him, the younger man laying his head on Jethro's chest. Laying his cheek on the softness of Tony's hair, Jethro allowed his own tears to fall. "I'm going to miss her, too."

Cait had been one of the best agents he'd ever had work under him, and certainly the best female agent he'd known in a long time. He'd cared for her deeply, loved her as a friend, but had never wanted it to be more. Rule # 12 existed for a reason, although Jethro had a distinct feeling that rule was about to be broken. Cait had been his prot?g?; she'd been a fantastic profiler and fearless agent. Jethro also knew that he would find Ari Haswari and kill him. He wouldn't be so kind as a single bullet to the head…Ari would pay, dearly.

Tony sniffled against his chest, and Jethro reached over, grabbing a tissue. "Here, don't wipe your snot on my shirt," he said, his sternness for show.

Snorting a laugh and accepting the tissue, Tony blew his nose, then looked up at Jethro. He moved up and when Jethro didn't back away, Tony kissed him. The kiss stayed gentle for about 3 seconds before Jethro took control, his tongue licking against Tony's lips, sliding inside when they parted for him. He felt his cock get hard when Tony moaned.

Jethro moved so that he could push Tony back onto the couch, all the while keeping their mouth fused together. He moaned when Tony's hands slid down his back, sliding under his pants and underwear to grasp Jethro's ass, pushing their erections together.

Tony moved his hands, reaching around to slip his hands between their bodies, undoing Jethro's pants, then his own. Jethro trailed kiss and nips down the side of Tony's jaw, smiling as Tony tilted his head back exposing the soft skin of his neck. Taking the advantage, Jethro kissed, then bit, then sucked at Tony's neck, while Tony pushed down his pants, grabbing and stroking Jethro's cock.

Leaving Tony's neck for a moment, Jethro leveraged his body away from Tony's long enough to shove his pants down and rip Tony's shirt open. Tony grinned, before reaching up and yanking Jethro's shirt open, buttons flying everywhere, then he pulled Jethro back down on top of him, taking his mouth in a kiss.

As their cocks slid together, hot flesh to hot flesh, they both moaned. Both of them were pumping against one another, both wanting the heat and pleasure of release. Finally, Tony slid a hand between them as Jethro attacked his neck again. Managing to wrap his hand around their leaking cocks, he guided them together. After that it took only a few thrusts before both of them were coming, shouting their release.

Jethro collapsed on top of Tony, both men were panting, both sated. After a few minutes, Jethro started to get up, but Tony protested. "Don't leave."

"Not going to. I want you in my bed, Tony…tonight and … after," Jethro said quietly, standing up. "C'mon." He offered a hand to Tony, helping him stand up.

Tony stood up, started to follow Jethro, and then stopped. "Are you serious about...about there being an us?"

"Yes. Are you?" Suddenly Jethro was afraid that this had just been some grief-induced relief for Tony.

Smiling softly, Tony walked towards Jethro. "Yeah…yeah, I am. Life is too short not to."

A short time later, Jethro lay awake in his bed, Tony wrapped around him, snoring lightly. Still not fully recovered from his plague ordeal, Tony had fallen asleep almost as soon as his head hit the pillow. Jethro was tired, but his mind was still busy. Cait Todd had been his agent; her death was on his hands as well as Ari's. After all, HE had been the target and he knew Ari had shot Cait to hurt him. Well, Ari had better pray to his God for protection. Leroy Jethro Gibbs was out for revenge. And he would have it.

***

Next story in series - Flowing Honey.

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