Title: Demons From the Past
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Tenth Doctor/Michael Cutter
Fandom: Doctor Who/Law & Order
Rating: R
Table: Cadenza challenge, 5_prompts
Prompt: Bridge -- This search goes on
Warning: ongoing story, past non-con
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my own imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the Tenth Doctor or Michael Cutter, unfortunately. Please do not sue.

***

Mike looked around a bit nervously, wishing that they hadn't come here. The Doctor had insisted that they come to the place where he'd been held prisoner when he was kidnapped, just to give him a sense of where they could begin to track down Mike's assailants.

He'd agreed reluctantly, even though it still made him shiver to see the walls of that room where he'd spent hours wondering if he would live or die. He'd been sure that his captors meant to take his life -- and if the Doctor hadn't found him, they might have done so.

He owed the Doctor everything -- and that was why he'd agreed to do this. Not only that, but he knew in his heart that he wouldn't be able to put the horrible experience to rest and close the door on it until he had some sort of closure.

At first, he'd been convinced that looking for the men who had kidnapped and raped him was useless; he had far too much experience with attempting to track down and prosecute criminals after a trail had gone cold to think that they would have much luck.

But the Doctor had managed to find one of them -- at least, one that he was sure had something to do with the abduction. He'd seen the man on the steps of Mike's apartment building on the first day they'd met, he insisted, watching Mike with an intent, purposeful gaze.

They'd already been searching for more of those men for days now, and they'd found nothing. But simply knowing who one of them was gave Mike a glimmer of hope that they might be able to track down the rest -- and hopefully, bring them to justice.

He had to force himself to look around the room; it had somehow seemed smaller when he was here before, but then, that shouldn't be surprising, considering the frame of mind he'd been in. He could almost look at the place now without feeling anything.

No, that wasn't quite true. There was a rising surge of panic, as though someone might come through that door at any moment and attack him, as though he was just as helpless as he'd been when he was lying here, tied up and gagged on the floor.

A shudder went through him at the memory; he could almost feel the cords digging into his flesh as he struggled to free himself, the wave of despair that had swept over him at the thought that he might never see the Doctor again ....

"Are you all right, love?" the Time Lord asked softly, squeezing Mike's hand. Mike realized that his lover was gazing at him with a look on concern on his face, obviously worried about him. He nodded, slowly, then shook his head in the negative, just as slowly.

"Yes .... no. I don't know," he sighed. "I thought I could deal with being here, but seeing this room .... just being here brings it all back. Mainly how scared I was that I'd never see you again. That was all I could think of most of the time I was here."

"I'm sorry, sweetheart," the Doctor murmured, looking contrite. "I shouldn't have made you come here. You don't have to stay, you know. I can take you back to the Tardis and come back myself to look around a bit more. I don't want to stir up unpleasant memories for you."

Mike shook his head, horrified at the very idea of the Doctor being here alone. He could only imagine what those men -- the entire gang or any combination of them -- would do to the Time Lord if they caught him here. He didn't want to think about it.

"No!" He almost gasped the single word, his grip on the Doctor's hand tightening until the other man almost winced. "I'm not letting you come back here alone. It's too dangerous. Besides, I need to face up to the past if I'm going to put it behind me once and for all."

"That's true, but I don't want you to do something that's going to make you feel worse," the Doctor told him, moving closer and sliding an arm protectively around his waist. "If you want to go back to the Tardis, love, just say so. We can leave right now."

Mike shook his head slowly, taking a deep breath. "No. I need to face this place, just like I'll need to face those men in court if they're ever caught. We should keep searching for them, Doctor. But I doubt they've used this place more than once."

The Doctor nodded slowly, agreeing with him. "After I found you here and the police searched the place thoroughly, they probably made sure that they found somewhere else to meet. I don't think we're going to pick up any clues to their identities here."

Mike sighed, knowing that the Doctor was right. They probably shouldn't have spent time here, but there was a part of him that was glad they had. He at least had been able to walk into this room without turning away. He'd been able to face one demon down and put it to rest.

Their search for whoever had abducted him would go on; the Doctor wasn't going to give up on it. Mike was more sure of that; he'd never known anyone as tenacious as the Doctor, not even when he was a prosecutor and he'd dealt with lawyers and cops every day.

The Doctor wouldn't be satisfied until he'd found those men and brought them to justice. Not just a few of them -- but all of them. And even though he hated to admit that he could be so vindictive, Mike wanted to find them and punish them all to the full extent of the law.

If it was up to him, he would step outside the law to punish them. But he'd spent most of his life trying to uphold the law, even when it hadn't seemed like enough of a punishment for some of the crimes he'd seen committed. He couldn't turn his back on that now.

Simply because this had involved him personally was no reason for him to turn away from the beliefs he'd upheld for all of the time he'd been a lawyer. He still believed that the wheels of justice would come around full circle, even if it took a while.

But it was still hard to turn away from the idea of revenge. It would be hard for anyone, he told himself as he moved towards the door of the room, refusing to look back. He'd seen enough of it. He knew that floor, these walls, well enough. They would be etched into his memory for a lifetime.

The Doctor followed him silently, taking his hand once they were out of the building and once again out in the bright sunshine of a cold winter's day. Mike took a deep breath as he looked up at the forbidding granite front of the building, his expression troubled.

"They're still out there, Doctor," he murmured, shaking his head. "They could do to other men what they did to me. I don't think I was their only target -- and I don't to see anyone else get hurt. Others might not be as lucky as I was. They don't have you to rescue them."

The Doctor nodded, his gaze moving up the facade of the building and then back to settle on Mike's face. "We'll find them, love," he promised, his voice low, just a hint of a growl in his tone. "This search isn't over. That's a promise. I won't let them go unpunished."

"I know, sweetheart," Mike replied, squeezing his hand reassuringly. "But we may be searching for them an awfully long time -- and we might not find them. I don't think to be negative, but we might end up having to face the fact that they got away with it."

In his heart, he hoped that wasn't true -- but he had to accept the fact that it might be. And meanwhile, this search would go on for the two of them, even if they eventually had to give up and make peace with the demons from the past in order to finally put them to rest.

***