Title: Peaceful Easy Feeling
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Tenth Doctor/Ten.5
Fandom: Doctor Who
Rating: PG-13
Table: 5, 12_stories
Prompt: 12, Peace
Author's Note: The human version of the Doctor is being referred to as John Smith in this fic, since it's the Doctor's human alias and his clone needed a name.
Author's Note: Spoilers for Journey's End, somewhat. This is an completely alternate take on the ending of Season Four.
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my own imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the Tenth Doctor, or his human clone. Please do not sue.

***

Jamie leaned his head against the Doctor's shoulder, a smile on his face. There was something about this particular place on Earth that always gave him a sense of peace, of belonging, even though he knew that he didn't want to spend his life on this planet.

Maybe there was something about certain places here that drew people to them because of the feeling they exuded, Jamie thought to himself, taking a deep breath. Even the scent of the air here made him feel relaxed and calm, at peace with the world.

He might not feel as though he belonged on Earth, but there was something about this planet that felt as though it was tugging at him. Humans populated this planet; millions of beings, people that were physically like him, if not mentally.

A small, wry smile curved his lips at that thought. He would never be like a human mentally; he had a Time Lord brain, one that was far more advanced than a human's. He would never be able to think like them, or call himself a "normal" human.

That was only one of the myriad of reasons why the Doctor had taken him away in the Tardis, rather than forcing him to surrender himself to a life he didn't want to live with a person he didn't love. In his eyes, it had been the right decision to make.

And in Jamie's eyes, it was the only decision. There was nowhere else he wanted to be, no other person he wanted to spend his life with. He might have a short human life span compared to what his mind was used to, but he knew how he wanted to spend that life.

He wanted to be with the Doctor. Every moment of the life that had been granted him, every second of every day, he wanted to spend by the Time Lord's side. He didn't care what anyone else might think of those feelings; they were his own, and he wouldn't deny them.

"This place is so peaceful," he murmured, letting his eyes roam around the area they were sitting in, marveling at the beauty of the lush greenery, the proliferation of flowers, the myriad of fresh scents in the air. It seemed like a garden of Eden, a paradise for lovers.

"I couldn't agree more, love," the Doctor told him, sliding an arm around his waist. "There's something about this place that's always made me feel calm inside -- there are times when I need to unwind and ease the tension, and this is usually where I come."

"We're not trespassing, are we?" Jamie looked around nervously, wondering if anyone would come along and tell them to leave. He didn't think so; the Doctor wouldn't bring him here if they weren't welcome, but the thought loomed in his mind, and he had to ask.

The Time Lord shook his head, smiling and letting out a soft laugh. "No, we aren't. This garden isn't usually open to the public, but I happen to know the person who owns it, and they don't mind letting me come here at times when I need to."

Jamie squinted up at the sky above them, trying to remember who the Doctor was talking about. But try as he might, he couldn't bring a face or a name to mind; there were still several large chunks of memory missing, and it was frustrating when they wouldn't fall into place.

"Memory lapse again?" the Doctor asked softly, his eyes on Jamie's face. The other man sighed and nodded, turning to look at his lover. He knew that the Doctor sympathized with his loss of memory, but he could never understand what it felt like.

"It's .... frustrating is the only word I can think of, but that doesn't begin to describe it," he said, looking around him again with a soft sigh. "At least when I'm here in a place like this, surrounded by all this beauty, it's easier to deal with that frustration."

"Let the peace of the surroundings seep into you," the Doctor told him, shifting slightly on the bench they were sitting on and moving closer to Jamie. "That's why I brought you here, sweetheart. To let this place give you some inner peace."

"I know that you were disturbed by the last serious conversation we had," Jamie began, his voice soft and hesitant. "I want you to know that I'm not going to bring that up again. It's something we don't need to think about for a long time, and I'm sorry that I upset you."

The Doctor shook his head, a soft smile on his lips as he leaned towards Jamie and brushed those lips across his lover's cheek. "Don't worry about it, Jamie. I was feeling a bit stressed, too. That's why I reacted in the way I did. I'm sorry, too."

"You don't have to be," Jamie murmured, feeling relieved that the Doctor wasn't annoyed or upset by him bringing up that disturbing subject of his own inevitable death again. This wasn't the time or the place for that, not when they were surrounded by such peaceful beauty.

There was such a peaceful feeling about the pastoral scene around him; he felt as though he could sit here forever and let the ease and tranquility of the place seep into his bones and permeate his being. But he knew they couldn't stay here for a long time.

It would be wonderful if they had a place like this to call their own, Jamie thought dreamily, closing his eyes and lifting his face to the sun. Maybe not here on Earth, but on some planet that was calm and quiet, a place where they could go to be alone and relax.

That wasn't going to be possible for them, he thought sadly, reluctantly letting the idea slip away from him. The two of them had a home on the Tardis; that was the only home that they were ever going to have, now that Gallifrey was gone.

He could vaguely remember images of Gallifrey in his mind; but those memories weren't his, not really. They belonged to the Doctor. He might be a part of the Doctor, but he wasn't Gallifreyan. He was human, and Earth was his home. Or it would be -- if he hadn't chosen to be with the man he loved.

As much as he liked places like this on Earth, he didn't want to live here. He didn't want to spend more time here than he had to if he didn't have the Doctor right by his side, sharing all of his impressions, sharing his life and loving him.

There were places like this on other planets in the galaxy, too -- though he didn't think that he'd ever seen any as beautiful as this. If he had, then he didn't remember them. But he would have plenty of time to replace his memories, and to make new ones.

Earth would never be his home. Not really. He liked it here, but his home was where the Doctor was. And even though this place gave him a peaceful, easy feeling, the Doctor gave him that same feeling on a much deeper level than any place they went to ever could.

He leaned close to the Time Lord, resting his head on the other man's shoulder again with a soft smile and drawing in a deep breath. He didn't need a place like this to bring him peace. All he needed to have that peace and contentment in his life was the man who was right here by his side.

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