Title: Fixing Google Earth
By: Dark Cascade
Pairing: Jack/Ianto
Rating: PG-13
A/N: This idea came into my mind when I was talking to a friend of mine (spncsifreak) online last night. Google Earth is mentioned..and theres Gwen bashing. PLUS Janto. Beta-d by spncsifreak cause shes awesome.
Warning: Gwen bashing
Summary: Gwen is an idiot,that we know. How will Ianto handle her labeling Torchwood Hub on Google Earth? More importantly, how will Jack? Janto with mentions of J/I/PC Andy, 'cause their my "guilty pleasure" ship.

***

Ianto sat in the Tourists Office, doing his monthly check. This always consisted of doing random searches on the Internet of words like "Torchwood", "The Doctor", and "Cardiff Secret Organization".

The only time he had ever come across something of consequence was the once he had came across a TV show by his employers' name, but he had quickly dismissed the website. Who would want to watch a show based on aliens and a hot leading man… by the name of Jack... actually, the more he thinks about it, the more the show starts sounding plausible. And nice to watch.

Google Earth was normally the tea-boy's last stop, seeing as though he could spend hours on the website anyway. Today being no different, he clicked the Search bar and typed in "Torchwood Hub". On another day, he would have gotten a box immdiately with things other than what he was actually looking for, and that was good.

Today, something else happened. Something came up, right in the center of Roald Dahl Plass. Shaking his head and clicking the link to Wikipedia, he saw that the entry was put up by someone with the account name ''. Now who did he know by that name?

Going down into the Hub and marching straight up to Gwen's desk, Ianto was beyond furious.

How could someone be so stupid as to put up a label on Google Earth for a place that's supposed to be the home of a secret organization? Isn't the avoidance of being found out the whole point of secret? That no one knows anything about it?

"Gwen, I demand an explanation for this!" he bellowed, turning his laptop in his hands to show the woman the screen.

"What, Ianto?" As she saw what page Ianto had pulled up, her eyes went wide.

"Oh...that...sorry, I lost a bet?" he rolled his eyes.

"Gwen Williams, what in the name of Paul o'Grady did you take to make you think that was okay? There are rules about this, Gwen! There are enough people running around Cardiff and the rest of the world who think they know a thing or two about aliens. Torchwood and 'The Doctor' are things frequented regularly on the web."

Toshiko looked up from her work and stared at the scene above her glasses.

"Gwen, you're a bloody idiot if you thought that was a good idea. No, take that back...you're an idiot either way for putting it on there in the first place."

"OWEN!" She called, wanting the medical expert to explain where she was coming from. It had been him she lost the bet to anyhow. He'd have no choice but to back her up, right?

"Gwen bloody Cooper, was the hell is wrong now?" Dr. Harper walked up the med-bay steps toward the group.

"Tell Ianto here why I put the label on Google Earth.". He waved her hand toward the computers.

"You put a label on Google Earth?" he grinned, happy that he wasn't the one in trouble.

"Yes, you bugger. I lost a bet to you and had to. Remember?" Owen shook his head.

"Can't say I do, Gwen. Are you sure it was me?"

"Owen, get off it."

"No, really, I don't actually remember anything about a bet, or Google Earth, or anything." Owen looked at Ianto.

"Well? Aren't you going to scream at her now?" On the brink of yelling at the doctor himself, the tea-boy nodded and turned back to Gwen.

Jack, after years of practicing horrid (although sometimes well-placed) timing finally paying off on its own, took this opportunity to come down from his office and talk to his team.

"Hey, kids...Yan, what's going on?" The Captain asked. Ianto didn't say a word; merely turned the computer screen so Jack could see it, and waited.

"Who?" Ianto inclining his head toward Gwen.

"You already yell at her?" the Welshman nodded.

"Great. Come on." He growled at his newest recruit, nodding toward his office.

Once she was out of eyeline, Ianto tossed Jack the pill bottle.

"Level Five ought to do it, you think?" Jack asked, taking the red pills out.

"Give her six and see if she remembers who she is." Ianto snarled, ready to give Gwen to the Weevils. Flirting with Jack was one thing, kissing Jack even, but once Torchwoods involved, Gwen should have treaded carefully. Too bad.

The newspaper the next day read 'Mysterious Woman Found Naked in Boom Town: Reported Amnesia'

"Andy?" Ianto said into the comm on his ear.

"Ianto, yeah, mate. I got it. Don't ask her anything about Torchwood and give Rhys this red pill? That right?"

"Yes, Andy. I owe you one, mate." Ianto smiled at Andy's response.

"Oh, you wait. I'll make some favor that'll top this one day."

"Clearing it with Jack is always good, as a first step."

"Oi, I don't think Jack'll disapprove." Ianto could almost see the wink.

"Talk to you later, An."

"Bye, Ianto."

The Welshman looked up at Jack, lying still on the bed under his office. A sheet covering the important bits, he pulled himself up on his elbows and looked at Ianto. "What'd he say?"

"That we owe him something good, and that you probably wouldn't disapprove." Ianto kissed his Captain's lips softly.

"I like how that boy thinks. Maybe he could be Gwen replacement. Much more fun."