Title: Intervention time
By: ebonyjet
Pairing: gen
Rating: PG
Summary: MSN, discussion and story about a sleeping Ianto Jones. A drunken Ianto, under a desk?

***


XxxHarkness.xxX
Gwen?

XxxCooper.xxX
Yes, Jack?

XxxHarkness.xxX
Does Ianto seem a little... Out of it to you?

XxxCooper.xxX
What do you mean? Like ill?

XxxHarkness.xxX
I was thinking more... Well drunk...

XxxCooper.xxX
He has been very happy today... But what's wrong with him being happy it's not like it's a crime.

XxxHarkness.xxX
It was a week ago today he watched his girlfriend die... Y would he be happy?

XxxCooper.xxX
Because he's... in denial?

****XxxHarper.xxX Has just signed in.****

XxxHarper.xxX
Jack where do you keep the single malt?

XxxHarkness.xxX
Hi, Owen... Why do you need to know that?

XxxHarper.xxX
I don't... Did Ianto know? Cos' he kinda hugging a bottle... and sleeping under my desk!

****XxxSato.xxX Has just signed in.****

XxxSato.xxX
Jack... I think Ianto's had a bit... way too much to drink.

XxxCooper.xxX
We know Tosh... He asleep... under Owen's desk.

XxxSato.xxX
Ok... Just thought you needed to know... Bye.

****XxxSato.xxX His/her status has been set to away.****

XxxHarkness.xxX
Well that's just great! We have a drunken staff member asleep under a desk... another first for Torchwood!

XxxHarper.xxX
I think I'd rather have a weevil under my desk... Can I kick him?

XxxHarkness.xxX
You do that and you really will find a weevil under you desk Owen.

XxxCooper.xxX
So wot do we do... you know about him?

XxxHarkness.xxX
We better go get him... Owen I'm gonna need your help to get him into my office onto the sofa... ok?

XxxHarper.xxX
Whatever.

XxxCooper.xxX
Meet at Owen's desk them... I'll get Tosh... I'm thinking when Ianto wakes up... its intervention time isn't it?

XxxHarkness.xxX
Not wrong there... I thought he was a little off... well all this week really... Drunk ... all week.

XxxHarper.xxX
He's been like this all week??

XxxCooper.xxX
I noticed too... I didn't wanna say anything, to get him in to trouble... Jack do you think he's ok?

XxxHarper.xxX
Jack?

XxxCooper.xxX
JACK!

****XxxHarkness.xxX Has just signed off.****

XxxCooper.xxX
Fine then. Owen? See ya in a sec.

****XxxCooper.xxX Has just signed off.****

****XxxHarper.xxX Has just signed off. ****

***

Jack let out a heavy sight looking down at the sleeping Ianto Jones under Owen's desk,
"Did no one notice that fact the man clearly hasn't ironed his shirt of shaved in a week?" He asked looking to Owen, Tosh and Gwen who all stood around the desk, looking down at Ianto.
"Oh! Cos you did!" Owen shot back glaring at him.
"God... he was right... Don't notice to him!" Gwen said sadly.
"Speak for your self!" Owen put in pointing down, "I noticed he's asleep under my desk... What more do I need to know?"
"How to get him out?" Jack suggested,
"Oh! That was so helpful boss. Thanks for that!"
"Owen shut up... Your going to wake him..." Toshiko's voice trailed off as Ianto groaned,
Ianto's light bleary eye's fluttered open and a hazy smile spread across his lips.
"Hey, Mate!" He said seeing Jack's disapproving look.

Everyone's eyes widened since when did Ianto address Jack as mate? This wasn't like him at all... but then again... when had they ever seen Ianto drunk? ...

The man under the desk reached up and tried to pull him self into standing position but only succeeded in hitting his head on the bottom of Owens computer table.
"Let me help you up." Jack said after he had attempted to hold Ianto's arm and pull him from under the desk, only to be shrugged off.
"I'm happy here!" Ianto protested slurring his speech slightly, "Don't wanna get up..."
"Come er." Jack muttered reaching for Ianto's arm.

Jack and Owen grabbed an arm each and roughly tugged Ianto away from the desk and to his feet. Both men having to support the wobbling Welsh man as he struggled to stay on his unsteady feet.

"Why have you done this to yourself?" Gwen said tilting her head to one side to look at Ianto's pupils... They where huge!
"Jack, that's not just booze!" She said waving a hand in front of Ianto's face "He's out of it!"
"Well that's just great!" Owen hissed at Jack, "Now what do we do with him... We don't even know what he's been taking!"

Tosh frowned and shook her dark head, "Yes we do!"
She had been rummaging thought Ianto pockets and bag to see if there was anything important in them and she now held up her findings for all to see.

"Shit!" Owen put a hand under Ianto's chin to hold his lolling head up and glare into his pail face.
"Caffeine pills?" Gwen looked a little lost, "What's so bad about that?"

"Has anyone seen him eat anything in the last week?" Jack asked the frantically pulling his free hand up to touch the side of Ianto's face, "He fifteen present dehydrated!"
Owen blinked in astonishment also pressing his free hand against Ianto's face, "That mean's he stops sweating... at twenty present he's... this isn't good Jack."
"Anyone seen him drink anything other then alcohol today?" Jack asked looking around for answers.

Everyone was silent.

"No one?" Jack looked from confused face to confused face. "Any one!"
"What the hell is wrong with the mad having caffeine pills?" Gwen asked loudly trying to get an answer.

"It's not just that!" Tosh held up something else she had found in Ianto's coat,
"I think there... aspirins or ... er what do you call it? Ibuprofen things... enough to go around the hole of Cardiff ... twice! And none of the boxes have anything in!"
Tosh looked at Jack panic clear on her face.
"Ianto, when you get better I'm going to smack you so god damned hard..."
"Owen shut up!" Jack heaved Ianto over his shoulder and carried him to his office the other following.


Jack gently rested Ianto on the tattered, old chocolate sofa that was pushed up against the left-hand wall in his office.
"OK so... Ibuprofen is a painkiller and an anti-inflammatory, and... if you take to much it kills the liver, stomach, brain, and heart. Caffeine pills cause the heart rate to increase some time's so much it just stop for know good reason and... well we all know what alcohol does to the body... so add all three together and you got?" Jack looked to Owen the doctor for answers.

Owen pointed to Ianto who was waving one hand in front of his face and looking like he had just seen the stars for the first time in his life. "That"
"You have know Idea do you?" Tosh asked looking down at Ianto who was slumped on the sofa smiling drunkenly up at ever one.
"I know he needs water and fast!" Owen snapped back at her.

"Gwen, Tosh, I need you to run into the kitchen and get as much water as you can."
Jack told them in a far less panicky voice to the one Owen was using.
The two girl darted off the get the water and Jack, Owen and Ianto where left alone.

***