Title: Returning To London
By: rosieposy
Pairing: Ianto/Owen
Rating: PG-13
AN: Thanks once again to JonesIantoJones for all your help.
Disclaimer: I do not own Ianto or Owen again I am just borrowing them.
Summary: Ianto and Owen take a trip to London and then have to deal with things when they get back.

***

Ianto hated London almost as much as he hated the countryside. The images that ran through his mind about the two were very similar; screaming, shouting, people running scared and the unmistakable smell of blood in the air. Why he had agreed to go to London with Owen he would never know, yet here he was sat in the SUV heading in that direction. They were heading to a Unit holding facility to look at a woman who they believed had come back through the rift.

The journey so far had been uneventful until 20 miles from London when Owen noticed that Ianto had become really quiet.

"Hey you ok?" He asked him.

"Yep fine." Was the curt reply.

"You sure." Owen said with concern.

"Yep." Was the only reply he got.

"Would you like me stop and get a bit of fresh air. You've gone very pale. Don't want you throwing up everywhere." Owen offered.

"No I'm fine. Just keep going." Ianto replied.

******TORCHWOOD******

By the time they got to the facility Ianto was looking even paler and he had a glazed look in his eyes.

"Ianto?" Owen said.

When he didn't respond Owen said it a little louder. That seemed to snap Ianto out of his trance. He turned and looked at Owen who asked "You ok? You zoned out on me there for a bit."

"Um yes think so." Ianto replied distractedly turning away and looking out the window.

"You don't look it." Owen said as he reached across and took Iantos wrist in his hand. "Your pulse is racing and your skin feels really clammy. Come on what's wrong? And don't say nothing. I've never seen you this distracted before."

"Promise you won't tell the others." Ianto said quietly.

"Whatever it is it can't be that bad. Just tell me." said Owen.

"It's London." He answered.

"Yes I know where we are." Owen smirked.

"More precisely it's Canary Wharf. I haven't been here since The Daleks and Cybermen invasion." Ianto said softly turning back to look at Owen.

"Oh shit Ianto I'm sorry. I didn't think when I suggested that you come with me. I just thought you could do with getting out of Cardiff for a bit." Owen explained.

"Neither did I. I thought I'd got over it, but being this close has just brought it all back. I don't know if I can go in there." He said nervously.

Owen looked at Ianto and said "Ok this is what we are going to do. We are going for a walk and get some lunch."

Ianto looked at him "How is that going to help me go in there?"

"It will hopefully calm you down." Owen said.

"You sure about that?" Ianto asked.

"No but it's worth a try. Come on we'll find somewhere close. My treat." Owen said trying to convince Ianto it was a good idea.

"Well when put like that how can I refuse, Dr Harper." Ianto smirked

They both got out of the SUV and started walking. Ianto was taking deep breaths trying to calm himself and not panic. Owen was watching him carefully before asking "So do you know of any good places to eat around here?"

"Yes there used to be a very good coffee shop down by the river, we could try there." He replied.

Then changing the subject asked "So where did you live when you were here?"

A thoughful look crossed Owens face before he replied "North London. Worked at the local hospital during my training and then stayed on once I qualified."

They carried on walking and Ianto was calming down a bit more as they talked. "Do you keep in touch with anyone from med school or the hospital here?"

"No it's hard with our job, you should know that. We can't exactly say what we do, can we? What about you?"

"No suppose not. Most of the friends I made here are either dead or retconned." Ianto said sadly.

"What about school or Uni friends." Owen asked

"Lost touch when I moved to London and since I've been back, well as you said with our job...

God we sound a right pair of losers." Laughed Ianto.

As they entered the coffee shop Owen turned to Ianto and smirked "Speak for yourself I am not nor will I ever be a loser."

******TORCHWOOD******

***

As they waited for their coffee and cheese toasties they carried on talking.

"So, Ianto started, "what made you work for Torchwood and why in Cardiff and not London?"

Owen bristled slightly at the question before he said "What makes you think I didn't work in London before going to Cardiff ?"

"Well I never saw you there or heard anyone mention your name. I'm sure I would've remembered. Plus we had a whole medical team and you were definitely not on it. So come on spill, how did you end up working for Jack in Cardiff ?" Ianto looked at him questioningly.

Owen looked away from Ianto and said quietly "Katie."

"Katie?" Ianto asked as a waitress came over with their lunch. "Who's Katie?"

Owen stared out the window for another few minutes before turning back and looking at Ianto with tears in his eyes "Katie was my fiancée."

Ianto stared at him "Oh God Owen I'm sor..."

"Just don't. Lets just say that London doesn't hold good memories for me either and you're not the only one to loose your girlfriend to aliens." Owen said picking up his sandwich and taking a bite.

"We make a right pair, don't we." said Ianto

"So come on then spill the beans about you and The Captain then. What's it like having him back?" Owen asked changing the subject.

"Nothing to tell." He replied trying not to look embarrassed.

"There must be. You trying to tell me you two aren't at it again?" Smirked Owen.

"Thats exactly what I'm saying. We're not so there's nothing to tell. " Ianto admitted.

"But we all thought..." Owen stuttered.

"Yes I know what you all thought, Owen. " Ianto said angrily.

"So why don't you want to go back to Jack?" Asked Owen.

Ianto looked up sadly and said "Because he broke my heart when he left and I won't put myself through that again if he decides not to stay. You know how bad I was; do you really think I could go through that again? I will always love him, but I can't be with him."

"No I wouldn't want to see you go through that again, once was enough. Although I have to say you are really funny when you are totally pissed." Laughed Owen.

"Yes ok thanks for reminding me what a prat I was. Anyway we can't put this off any longer. I've calmed down now so we should get back to the job that we're here for." Ianto said getting up and putting on his coat.

"Ok I'll go and pay. " Said Owen standing up and making his way to the cash desk.

As they walked back to the Unit facility Ianto said "Thanks for listening to me Owen I think it helped, oh and thanks for lunch."

"That's ok I am your doctor after all. If you start feeling panicky let me know and we'll stop until it's over. And seeing as I bought you lunch you can buy dinner when we get back to Cardiff." Said Owen.

"Ok Dr. Harper." Ianto smirked.

As they walked enjoying the sunshine and talking they found out that they both loved to play chess as they passed a couple of old men playing outside a café. Ianto also found out that Owen liked Rugby, even if he did support England and not Wales, at least it wasn't Scotland Ianto thought. All too soon they were back at the facility and Owen noticed that Ianto had gone quiet again.

***

As Owen and Ianto arrived at the Unit facility Ianto was once again beginning to panic again. Owen took one look at him before saying "Ianto maybe you should wait out here while I go in and find out about this woman."

Ianto turned and looked at Owen, and trying to be calm said "No that's ok Owen we both should see her."

"Ianto you're in no fit state to be going into a building that holds so many unpleasant memories. I really can't imagine what's going on in your head but I bet it's not pretty and I really don't want to have to deal with you having a full blown panic attack. Look there's a bench just over there, why don't you sit and calm down a bit, ok? I can probably deal with this a lot quicker if I'm not having to worry about you." Owen suggested.

"Are you sure?" Ianto asked looking towards the front doors, " I really don't think I can go in there."

"Yes I'm sure. Like I said I can deal with this quicker if you're not there. Just wait for me here and when I've got all the information I will come and find you, then we can get back to Cardiff." Owen reassured him.

Once Owen had got Ianto seated on the bench he turned and went into the building. It was quite a big building and after finding out from the receptionist which floor he needed and getting a security pass Owen headed up to floor 12 to find Dr Miller.

******TORCHWOOD******

Outside Ianto was trying to calm down. His head was full of thoughts of Lisa, Cybermen and Daleks and he was becoming more and more agitated. He decided to go for a walk thinking it might distract his mind if he could focus on something else. As he got up and turned away from the building he saw a signpost for Canary Wharf Memorial Garden, he thought for a minute before heading that way. He walked around the back of the facility and through an archway, where he found a garden surrounded by a wall. Just inside the arch was a small plaque with the words: This Garden was built in rememberance of all those who lost their lives at Canary Wharf in 2006. Ianto's breath caught in his throat as he bit back a sob that was trying to escape. He hadn't known the garden existed. He managed to stop the tears that were threatening to fall and made his way around the path to the back of the garden, here he found a stone wall with a list of the dead on it. He couldn't hold back the tears any longer as he crumpled to the ground and wept.

******TORCHWOOD******

Owen found Dr Millers office and talked to him about the woman that he and Ianto had come to collect. It seemed she had been found wandering the streets of London talking of seeing bright lights, shiny stars and aliens that looked like rhinos. The people who had found her took her to the police who then handed her over to Unit. Once Dr Miller had assessed her he had decided that the best place for her was at the hospital on Flat Holm, hence the reason Owen and Ianto were there. Dr Miller went through the things that Owen should know about the woman who apparently couldn't remember her name so the staff there had called her Shelley (after the person who found her). She had scarring all over her body, like she had been burnt and she wouldn't talk to anyone just kept mumbling to herself about the rhinos that walked on two legs and carried guns. Shelley also didn't like any physical contact and screamed if anyone touched her.

Once Owen had all the information he turned to Dr Miller "Well thanks for all your help Dr Miller, we'll take her from here. If you could get her ready to transport back to Cardiff I will go and find Mr Jones and let him know we are ready to go."

"You're more than welcome Dr Harper. I just wish there was more that we could've done for her here, but we just don't have the resources." Dr Miller said sadly looking through the window at Shelley. "Please look after her."

"We will. I will be back in a few minutes once I have spoken to Ianto and got the SUV." Said Owen turning and walking away.

******TORCHWOOD******

When Owen got outside he couldn't see Ianto anywhere. "Oh shit" he thought as he looked around "where is he?"

***

Owen scanned the front of the building again in the vague hope that Ianto had just moved from the bench. Not seeing him anywhere he raced back into the reception area and up to the desk. "Have you seen a man six footish, dark hair, wearing a suit?" He asked breathlessly.

The girl behind the desk looked up at him and replied "No, he hasn't been through here. Maybe he went for a walk."

"Yes maybe." Said Owen distractedly as he frantically pulled his mobile out. He scrolled down through his contact list until he got to 'Tea-boy' then hit the connect button. "C'mon. C'mon answer your phone Ianto. Dammit!." He shouted as it went through to voicemail. "Ianto where are you?" Owen thought as he tried ringing him again, only to get the voicemail again. He walked outside to see if Ianto was back, that was when he noticed the sign to the Memorial Garden. Maybe, just maybe Ianto had gone for a walk. He ran in the direction it pointed, under the arch calling Iantos name. As he entered the Garden he could hear sobbing, and he slowed down and followed the noise. What he saw nearly broke him. Ianto was sat with his back to a wall crying. It was then that Owen saw the names etched into the wall.

"Ianto." Owen said quietly not wanting to frighten the other man.

Without looking up Ianto spoke in a flat voice "It's a list of the dead from The Battle."

"Ianto." Owen said again.

"I didn't know this garden existed." Ianto continued still crying as Owen sat down next to Ianto and put a comforting hand on his arm. He didn't say anything just let Ianto cry until the tears stopped falling. Ianto turned to him and clearly embarrassed mumbled "Thanks."

"C'mon I think the sooner we get back to Cardiff the better don't you? Dr. Miller is getting our patient ready for the ride back. I just need to get the SUV around to the front so we can get her in without touching her too much as that apparently freaks her out." Owen said standing up and holding his hand out to help Ianto up. What he wasn't prepared for was the hug Ianto pulled him into before striding out of the garden leaving him stunned.

******TORCHWOOD******

Owen followed Ianto out of the garden, to the SUV and got in wordlessly. Owen drove it around to the front of the building. Before Ianto could get out Owen put a hand on his arm and said "Are you going to be ok?"

Turning to look at Owen Ianto replied "I'm not sure. Being here and seeing the list of the dead has brought it all back. I just hope the nightmares don't start again. Thanks for listening and not freaking out when I panicked. "

"Look I'm here for you if you want to talk, especially if the nightmares get too much for you. I know from experience what they can do along with the lack of sleep. It's not pretty. Just tell me if they get too much and I'll try and help."

"Thanks Owen." Ianto said turning to open the door. "Now I do believe we have a patient to get to Flat Holm. C'mon as you said the quicker we do this then quicker we get back to Cardiff. "

"Yes I did didn't I. I also said when we get back to Cardiff you were going to buy me dinner."Owen said smirking at Ianto before exiting the SUV. "Stay here while I go and let Dr. Miller we're ready to take Shelley with us now. "

"Shelley?" inquired Ianto "Is that her name?"

"No, but it's what she's going to be called until she's able to tell us her real name - assuming she actually remembers it and who she was." He said sadly.

******TORCHWOOD******

Dr. Miller was waiting for him in the reception area with a very subdued Shelley in a wheelchair. "Ah Dr. Harper I have sedated Shelley as I thought it best for the journey - you really don't want her having a panic attack while you are driving. All her notes along with her medication are in this bag." He said pointng to a large blue bag. "I take it your transport is out the front?"

"Yes it is. How long will the sedative last?" Owen asked picking up the bag, grabbing the handles on the wheelchair and walking out the door with Dr. Miller following.

"We gave her enough to last you getting to Flat Holm as long as you don't encounter any major hold-ups on the way, but just incase there is some more in the bag." Replied the Doctor as he spotted the SUV with another man, who he presumed to be Mr Jones, leaning against it. Upon seeing them Ianto opened the back door. Between the three of them they managed to get Shelley into the back and buckled in. Turning to the two men he said "Well thank you gentlemen and like I said earlier Dr. Harper please look after her." He then turned and took the chair back into the building.

"Right then lets get going back to sunny Cardiff." Said Owen getting into the drivers seat. Once Ianto was in and they had their seatbelts on Owen negotiated the traffic out of London, heading for the M4 and Cardiff.

***

Once on the M4 Ianto looked at the map and without looking up said " I think we should stop at the services near Swindon, they're about half way. We can check on Shelley and grab a coffee and some chocolate to keep us going. I reckon we should be back in Cardiff by five thirty sixish."

"Yes but then we've still got to get Shelley to Flat Holm, that's going to take an hour then at least another hour settling her in and telling Helen all about her, well as much as we know, then another hour back. Then we've got to write the reports. By which time it's going to be at least eleven and I'm going to be too knackered to go out and eat." Grumbled Owen.

"Well we'll just have to take a rain-check on dinner then for when you're in a less grumpy mood." Ianto smirked switching the radio on and tuning it into the local station so that they would hear any traffic updates .

They continued along the motorway both of them lost in their own thoughts. Going back to London had stirred up memories that both would've been happy to forget. Ianto kept a surreptitious eye on Shelley in the mirror of the sun visor, he was happy to note that she was still under the influence of the sedative. He was also keeping on eye on the road as he knew what Owen was like once he got behind the wheel he was oblivious to anything but getting to the destination.

"Owen you need to pull over into the nearside lane, the service station is coming up in a couple of miles." Ianto told him not looking at him but at the woman in the back.

"Um what?" Owen said distractedly.

"I said you need to get in the inside lane to come off at the services, I need to stop even if you don't." Replied Ianto this time turning to Owen to make sure he had heard.

"Well why didn't you say so. Don't want a wet patch on the seat do we?" Laughed Owen indicating to pull over and off the motorway.

"Not that sort of stop." Ianto snapped "I need coffee if you want me still awake when we get to Cardiff."

"Oi I was only joking." Owen snapped back.

"I know. It's just..." Started Ianto

As Owen pulled into a parking space he waited to see if Ianto would continue, he'd just about given up when he heard Ianto quietly say "It's just everything that's happened today, well my sense of humour has left me."

"Look lets forget I said it ok. Why don't you go get us both a coffee and I'll check Shelley over. How much longer till we get to Cardiff?" Owen asked getting out and opening the back door so he could get better access to his med bag and Shelley.

Ianto also got out saying "About another 75miles." before asking "Do you want anything to eat or just a coffee?"

"Just coffee ta." He replied already checking over his patient.

Ianto walked off. He couldn't believe he'd snapped at Owen like that, especially since Owen had been really good to him while they were in London. He thought back to when they'd had lunch and what Owen had said about his fiancée, Katie, about losing her to aliens. "God how selfish am I, I didn't even ask him anything else, too busy thinking how London was affecting me to worry about what he was saying." He thought stunned. He resolved to keep an eye on Owen and be there for him, if he was needed, when they got back just in case this trip had affected him too. When Ianto got back to Owen he handed over a Mars bar he'd gotton him along with a coffee, at Owens questioning look he said "I thought we could both do with a sugar hit, it's going to be a while till we get something proper to eat. You know I get queasy on the boat to The Island. How's Shelley doing?" He asked biting into his Snickers bar.

"She's doing ok. What about you? You found that humour of yours yet?"Owen said unwrapping his Mars bar and taking a big bite.

"Ha bloody ha." Ianto sarcastically replied and then continued quietly "I'm fine."

Owen looked at him before turning away mumbling "Yes sure you are."

******TORCHWOOD******

They had decided to switch places so Ianto was driving. As they got to the M4/M5 interchange their was an announcement on the radio of severe hold ups on the Severn Crossing. "Oh just great." Ianto muttered then a bit louder so Owen would hear "Owen can you have a look at the map and see which other way we can go?"

Owen pulled open the map and studied it then said "We can take the M48 and go over the old bridge. Shouldn't add too much to the journey."

"Ok." Said Ianto switching lanes as the turn off for the M48 was coming up.

The rest of the journey was uneventful with little talking and no more hold-ups save for the roadworks just outside Cardiff. They managed to get to the Bay by 6.30. "Not bad going, even if you do drive like a little old lady." Owen said laughing.

"Just because I don't drive like Jensen Button does not make me an old lady." Ianto shot back.

"Yes whatever. Did you phone George about our trip?" Asked Owen getting out and stretching.

"Phoned him before we left London, so he should be here waiting." Ianto said also getting out. Looking around for George he pointed in the direction of a boat with a man standing on deck and turning slightly said "There he is."

"Right you go ask if he's all set and I'll drive the SUV nearer so we can get Shelley on board without raising too much interest." Owen told Ianto as he got back in the vehicle.

Ianto walked towards George as he got closer he called out "Evening George you all set?"

George looked up "Yep been here since half five in case you were early."

"Sorry hold-ups on the bridge had to cross by the old one." Ianto replied as Owen pulled as close to the harbour edge as he dared.

As Owen got out he turned to the two men saying "Right you two less gossiping and more helping me get her on board I don't want to be out here all night."

Between the three of them they got Shelley settled in the front cabin out of the wind which had got up and set off for The Island.

The journey there went without a hitch as did settling Shelley in. Owen handed over the notes from Dr. Miller along with her medication. As they left Owen turned to Helen and said "Thanks. If you need more information call me or Dr. Miller and we'll try and help."

It was getting very late by the time they returned, neither of them particularly wanted to go back to the Hub and do their reports so Ianto text Jack "We r bck. 2 tired. Going home. C u 2moro. I&O"

Jack responded immediately "OK. J"

"You want a lift back?" Owen asked Ianto.

"No I fancy a walk. It's been a long day want to try and clear my head a bit otherwise I wont be able to sleep. But thanks for the offer. " Ianto replied pulling his coat around him and stuffing his hands in his pockets.

Owen looked at him with a frown on his face "Ok if you're sure. See you tomorrow. Bye."

With a "Bye" thrown over his shoulder Ianto walked away.

******TORCHWOOD******

Once Ianto had reached his flat it was gone midnight and he was freezing. He wished he'd taken Owen up on his offer of a lift, as he didn't feel any better for having walked. His head was pounding and he could feel his eyes beginning to ache but he wasn't sure if that was due to his headache or the wind. He took is coat and shoes off by the front door and made his way to the kitchen. He rummaged in one of the cupboards looking for the painkillers he knew were there. He gave a frustrated sigh until his fingers found the packet. Popping two pills out Ianto went to the sink picked up a glass from the draining board and half filled it with water before popping them in his mouth and taking a mouthful swallowed them down. Ianto then walked through his flat to the bathroom where he set the shower going before removing his clothes and stepping under the hot spray. As the water worked it's magic into his tired muscles he thought back over the day. He couldn't believe his reaction to being back in London, he also couldn't believe Owens reaction and how caring and supportive he had been. When he had finished and dried himself Ianto headed for his bedroom where he pulled open the top drawer of his chest and removed pyjama bottoms and a red t-shirt that he put on before climbing into bed. He was hoping that between the fresh air, painkillers and relaxing shower that sleep would come quickly. An hour later he was still wide-awake so decided he'd get up and make himself a milky hot chocolate. As he waited for the milk to warm he thought again about the conversation that he'd had with Owen at lunch. He wondered how Owen was doing now they'd returned home to Cardiff, knowing that the trip had been hard for them both. he considered phoning Owen just to check how he was, but thought better of it after seeing how late it was. "He'll be asleep anyway. I'll talk to him tomorrow." He thought before he drank his chocolate and headed back to bed, where he fell into a fitful sleep.

******TORCHWOOD******

Across the other side of Cardiff, Owen was trying to drink himself into oblivion. Being back in London had stirred up memories he had long thought couldn't hurt him, but being that close to where it had all happened had proved too much. He hadn't had time to dwell on it at the time as he had been too busy focusing on Ianto, but now - well now it was comiing back full force and he didn't know how he was going to cope. He collapsed sobbing onto his bed, clutching a photo of Katie.

***

Owen woke up feeling nauseous. He also had a pounding headache and his mouth felt like something had died in it. He sat up gingerly so as not to aggravate his stomach, it was then he saw the photo of Katie and the previous day came crashing back to him. He rushed to the bathroom where he threw up in the toilet. After what felt like hours but in reality was minutes there was nothing left to bring up. Owen flushed the toilet rinsed his mouth and put the shower on. He felt a little better when he'd finished and made his way back to his bedroom and dressed for the day. He debated whether to have breakfast but decided against it as his stomach was still feeling delicate. On his way to the front door he grabbed his keys, wallet and mobile. As he picked up his phone he noticed he had a message. Looking at it he saw it was from Ianto, he pressed the view button and read 'Just checking ur ok afta yesday. If u want to tlk i'm here ok. Oh & thanks. I.' He flipped it shut without replying and left his flat.

******TORCHWOOD******

Ianto had given up on getting anymore sleep at half five. He'd maybe got a couple of hours in before the nightmares came and once he was awake he just couldn't get back to sleep, so here he was cleaning his flat. He'd sent Owen a text but wasn't expecting a reply as it was still very early. He decided at seven that his flat couldn't get any cleaner so headed for the Hub where he knew there would be lots to clean as he hadn't been there the day before. Ianto always found that cleaning had a calming effect on him. Some called it OCD but Ianto didn't care, it helped him when his mind was full of things he didn't want to think about. The first thing he did upon arriving was make a pot of coffee. He hadn't had a decent cup in over 24hours and he needed one badly. As the machine was warming up he fed Janet and Myfanwy but taking his time, as he knew the rest of the team wouldn't be in for another hour at least, except Jack who lived there. Ianto was a bit surprised that he hadn't seen Jack yet especially with the coffee on. As he came down from Myfanwy's nest Jack was coming up from the shooting range "Is that coffee I smell or just a Welshman?" Jack said grinning at Ianto.

Ianto greeted Jack with a smile "Morning Jack, coffee?"

As Ianto headed up to the coffee machine to finish making them coffee Jack followed asking "How's the patient you picked up in London? Did you get them settled on The Island?"

Ianto handed Jack his blue and white striped mug as he replied "Shelley is fine. Just a little disorientated about where she is and what she's seen but with Helen and the staffs help Owen is hoping she will be ok."

"Good. And how was London?" Jack inquired.

Ianto hesitated before answering "London was... lets just say I don't want to go back there in a hurry and I don't think Owen does either."

Jack looked at Ianto questioningly but when he didn't elaborate Jack didn't ask anything else, he just let it be. "Right so have you done the report?"

"Yes I've written mine it's on your desk. Owen still needs to do the medical report on Shelley and then it's complete." Ianto said as the sirens went off alerting them to someone coming into the hub. To both their surprises it was Owen.

Jack looked at his watch and laughed "Is the world ending Owen or did someone give you an alarm clock that works?"

Owen ignoring Jack shouted "Any coffee left teaboy or have you two drunk it all?"

"There's a bit or you can wait for a fresh pot, which I was just about to do." Ianto said turning back to the machine ignoring the teaboy dig - Owen was obviously in a bad mood. "Maybe London affected him more than he let on." he thought again vowing to himself he'd be there if Owen needed him.

"Just give me what you have." Grumbled Owen confirming he was indeed in a bad mood.

Ianto poured Owen a mug and added milk and sugar before handing it to Owen who had made his way over.

"What's put you in such a grump? Some girl kick you out of her bed too early." Smirked Jack.

"None of your damn business Harkness." Owen snapped back grabbing his mug and stomping down to the autopsy bay where he switched on his computer and made a start on his report.

Ianto stared at Jack before saying quietly "Go easy on him - I suspect going back to London wasn't easy on him either."

"What do you mean Ianto?" questioned Jack.

"Not my place to say but we all have memories we'd like to forget." Ianto said cryptically walking away and down to the archives.

Jack looked from the autopsy bay to the archives and wondered just what had happened in London. He then went back to his office brought up the internal CCTV, splitting the screen so that he could see both Owen and Ianto and sat back watching.

******TORCHWOOD******

Twenty minutes later Tosh and Gwen were just getting in when the rift alarm sounded. Tosh hurried over to her bank of computers as Jack came down from his office "Morning Tosh, what've we got?" He asked coming to stand behind her.

Tosh didn't take her eyes off the screens as she answered "Rift activity down by the docks, doesn't look too big."

"Ok Owen with me." He yelled already heading towards the garage.

Owen met him by the SUV, getting into the passenger seat as Jack was already in the drivers with the engine going. As they made their way to the docks Jack looked over at Owen before asking, "So what happened in London to make you so grumpy today and Ianto go on one of his cleaning frenzies?"

"How'd you know it's not the reason you said. And what'd you mean cleaning frenzy?" Owen quickly retorted back.

"Because if it'd been for a woman kicking you out of bed you would've made a joke about her, which you didn't. And also Ianto said to go easy on you after yesterday."

"Nothing happened in London. I'm fine it was just a long day." Owen lied hoping Jack would believe him. " You still didn't tell me about Iantos cleaning."

"Ah that. Whenever something is bothering Ianto he cleans, reckons it calms him down. He was in the Hub just after seven this morning and by the state of his hands when I saw him it wasn't just the Hub he'd been cleaning." Jack told Owen "So c'mon what happened in London?"

They had arrived at the docks and as they got out Owen said "It's not my place to say, but I think we may need to keep an eye on him."

Jack raised his eyebrow but said nothing. "Looks like I need to keep an eye on them both. Something happened - I'm just not sure what." He thought to himself.

"Right Jack the energy signal is coming from the building at the far end. It looks to be harmless but take care." Toshs voice sounded over their comms.

"Thanks." Responded Jack. "This way." he added to Owen walking away from him. Owen followed muttering something about teaboys and keeping their mouths shut. As they got to the right building they both withdrew their guns and cautiously approached the door. Owen opened it to let Jack in, and when he was sure it was safe Owen followed. They walked towards the back keeping their eyes peeled for anything unusual. The only thing they found was a small square box. Jack scanned it and it was the piece they were after and it was indeed harmless. They made their way back to the SUV and then back to the Hub.

Once back Jack gave the box to Tosh to run tests on it before it got filed. Ianto stayed in the archives only coming up to order lunch, but he didn't eat with the rest of the team. Owen finished the report for Shelley. Gwen was doing liason work with Andy. Tosh finished the tests she was running and Jack was sat in his office watching over his team. At six he decided that as the rift was quiet, they could all go home. Before he left Owen went to find Ianto who was still in the archives "Ianto you ok after yesterday? Any nightmares?"

"No no nightmares. I'm fine thanks." Ianto lied then quietly asking "What about you? I realised it couldn't have been easy for you either."

"I'm ok. And you still owe me a dinner and don't think for one minute I'm going to forget about it." Owen laughed then turning he started to leave before adding "If you do start having nightmares and can't sleep or if you just want to talk let me know I promise I won't judge you." He started walking again but not before he heard Ianto quietly say "I'm here for you too."

They both knew it would take something big to get them to talk about their fears.

***

It had been over three weeks since Owen and Ianto had been to London. They were both suffering silently, neither of them wanting to admit to anyone just how hard going to London had been. Ianto immersed himself in the archives and cleaning everything in sight, while Owen fell apart just as quietly in drink and women. Neither realised how much the other was suffering.

"Ianto." Jack bellowed from the top of the stairs "Any chance of a coffee?"

Ianto looked up from what he was doing on his computer "Sorry Sir did you want something?"

Jack repeated his request for coffee. "Yes ok, anyone else?" Ianto asked getting up and moving to the machine. There was a collective yes. As he handed them their respective mugs they all went back to work and he was just about to sit back down when Jack said "Ianto a word in my office if you please?"

Ianto looked up and frowned. He was sure he hadn't done anything wrong or anything to upset Jack so he was at a loss as to what Jack wanted to talk about, but he turned and followed Jack to the office.

"Shut the door and take a seat and don't look so nervous you've done nothing wrong." Jack said laughing at the bemused expression on Ianto's face.

"So what did you want me for?" Ianto asked.

Jack stared at Ianto for a minute trying to work out the best way to say what he wanted. In the end he decided to just came out with it. "I've noticed that you seem to be doing an awful lot of cleaning and while the Hub has never been so clean I'm worried."

Iaton look perplexed "Worried about the Hub being clean?"

Jack chuckled "No woorried about you. When something is upsetting or bothering you, you turn to cleaning to help calm you down, but this has been going on since you came back from London. So as a concerned boss and friend is there anything I can do to help? Are you having nightmares?"

"Thanks for your concern Jack but I'm fine really, I just like to keep on top of things." Ianto reasoned.

"Yes you always did like being on top." Smirked Jack then in a more serious tone added "Are you sure you don't want to talk about what happened in London because I know something did and if you are suffering nightmares talking about them might help. Even if you don't want to talk to me I think you need to talk to someone before it becomes a real problem."

"Everything is fine nothing happened in London so I don't need to talk about it and if you find having a clean place to work abhorrent I'll stop and let you live in a pigsty." Ianto angrily shot back.

"Hey calm down. I was just trying to be a friend."

"Ok and I do appreciate it but there is nothing wrong I really am fine." Said Ianto more calmly than before. "If there's nothing else I need to get back to work."

"No nothing else, but Ianto if you do want to talk about anything I will always find time for you." Jack said as Ianto got up.

Ianto went back to work but he couldn't concentrate. Jack had stirred up the memories of last night's nightmare and now he was itching to clean something to calm him, but he couldn't especially since Jack had noticed and no doubt would be keeping an eye on him.

******TORCHWOOD******

Jack had been watching Ianto as he returned to his computer, he could see him fighting the urge to go and clean something. Jack knew it wouldn't be long before he gave into that urge and with one last look he got up and exited his office. He casually walked around the hub seeing what the others were up to. Tosh had some complicated programme about the rift predictions running and he was lost as soon as she started talking. With a pat on her shoulder and a "Good work Tosh." he went over to Gwens work area to see what she was upto. She had a chart up and a map of Cardiff

"What you doing?" he asked trying to sound intrested.

"I'm trying to pin point known weevil nests in Cardiff. This chart shows were they have been seen and then I put them on the map. This way we can see at a glance the highest concentrations for future reference." Gwen explained. "Did you need me to do something else?"

"No carry on - that's a really good idea." Jack told her as he moved off to his final destination and Owen in the autopsy bay.

"Hey Owen what you doing?" Jack asked although he could clearly see that Owen was doing an autopsy on the purple thing they had picked up in the early hours of this morning.

Owen didn''t look up as he replied sarcastically "What's it look like I'm doing, eating lunch."

Jack laughed then carried on in a quiet voice "You got a minute to talk?"

That got Owens attention - Jack almost sounded anxious. "Yes give me two minutes. I just need to get...ah got it." Said Owen putting something into a metal dish. "Right come on then what do you want to talk about or you want me to give you advice on how to pick up women or men in yuor case."

"No nothing like that. Ianto." As though that said it all.

"Ianto." Owen repeated

"Yes Ianto. I'm worried about him." Jacks voice was full of concern. "He's still obsessively cleaning and I think I might have upset him by mentioning it and now he's fighting the urge to clean something."

"Do you know when it started? At least then we can work out how to help him. But if he won't talk then there's not much we can do." Owen asked looking at Jack.

"It started when you got back from London. He says nothing happened but I'm not so sure. Going back must've brought up bad memories for you both. You seem to be ok but Ianto...Iantos not. Thing is if he's having nightmares and then not sleeping eventually that's going to affect his work and if we're out in the field and he's not one hundred percent alert well I don't want to think of the consequences do you? So you going to tell me what happened?"

"Look Jack you're right something did happen." Owen started, he put up his hand to stop Jack from interrupting "And no I'm not going to tell you. What I will do is talk to Ianto and go from there. Ok?"

Jack wasn't happy about that but he had to concede that maybe Owen was right. He obviously knew what was upsetting Ianto so was more likely to open up to him. "Ok we do it your way for now. But if it doesn't get resolved I will pull him out of the field right?"

"Right just give me a couple days and then we will review the situation." Owen said going back to his purple alien.

***

It was a little before five a couple of days later, when Owen made his way to Jacks office. He didn't bother knocking as he could see Jack wasn't doing anything useful just watching the internal CCTV.

"Jack I've finished that autopsy and concluded that it didn't have anything nasty and that what killed it was your bullet to it's head." He said and then asked "Is it ok if I get off now, only I thought I could do that other job you wanted me too, besides Ianto owes me dinner."

At that Jack looked away from the screen in front of him and raised his eyebrow.

Owen responed to the unanswered question "Long story and one I don't want to get into right now. So is it ok to get Ianto and go?"

"Yes yes go." Jack told him. "Let me know how you get on. Tell Tosh and Gwen they can go as well. It's looking to be a fairly quiet night. Just keep your phone on in case I need you."

With that Owen went in search of Ianto saying to the girls they could go as he passed them. As predictable as Ianto was Owen found him in the archives surrounded by paperwork.

"Hey Ianto Jack says we can get out of here as the rift is going to be quiet. Thought we could catch up with a few beers and I seem to remember you promising to buy me dinner. Now seems as good a time as any." Owen said cheerfully.

Ianto grumbled "I've still got all this filing to do as it wont do its self." .

Owen looked at Ianto, really looked and thought "How could I have missed how bad he looks. I'm a doctor I'm supposed to be observant."

"The paperwork isn't going anywhere but you are. Now get your jacket and coat and let's get out of here." He answered back.

Ianto was still grumbling about the paperwork as they made their way upto the main part of the Hub.

"Look Tosh and Gwen have already gone." Observed Owen. He then turned to Ianto "Where do you want to eat?"

"Look Owen it's not that I'm backing out of our deal but thing is I'm not really hungry. Can we do it another night. If I've got some time off I'd rather just go home have a bath and catch up on some sleep, you know how hectic it's been over the last few weeks." He said tiredly to Owen.

"Nope sorry you are going to buy me dinner, don't care if it's in a pub, restaurant, pizza hut or takeaway, but you and I are having dinner tonight and a long overdue talk about London." Owen said with force.

Ianto stared at Owen before nodding his head in defeat. They headed for the invisible lift both of them shouting "Good night." to Jack who was still in his office.

******TORCHWOOD******

Once outside Owen turned to Ianto "Right where do you want to eat? Before you say It's up to me I'm not fussy."

"Ok if I'm being forced to eat let's go to The Wharf on Schooner Way. I really like their veggie sausages." Ianto answered putting his gloves on and then walking towards Lloyd George Avenue. They then cut up through Hemingway Road and from there onto Schooner Way. The pub was about half way up so didn't take long to get there. They entered and found a table in a quieter part of the pub. Before Owen sat down he asked Ianto what he wanted to drink and then leaving him to look over the menu went to the bar and got two pints of Brains beer. As he put them on the table and sat down Ianto spoke.

"I thought I was buying dinner not you?"

Owen chuckled then took a large mouthful of beer before answering "You are. But that doesn't mean I can't buy you a beer. So what's the menu like? Don't think I've ever been in here before, well not to eat. Might've been here on a pub crawl or something."

Ianto had to smile at that which was so typically Owen. He then passed the menu over saying "The veggie sausages are good or if you want something with meat the chilli."

Owen didn't even look at the menu "Chilli it is then."

"You sure. Not going to be too hot for you?" Ianto quipped getting up to go and place the order.

"Nothing's too hot for me." Smirked Owen as he watched Ianto walk away.

When Ianto returned he said "So what's this really about? And don't say it's because I owe you dinner. You've not mentioned it in three weeks. You've been too busy getting drunk and going out on the pull."

Owen looked stunned at that. He was sure no one had noticed what he was doing. He held his hands up in surrender.

"Ok Jacks worried about you. Apparently I'm not the only one doing things to excess." At Iantos questioning look he continued. "Your obssessive cleaning."

Ianto sighed "Right. Look Owen I admit things aren't great but it's nothing I can't handle. Can you say the same?" At that moment their food arrived.

"Wow you were right this is hot." Commented Owen as he swallowed a mouthful of chilli.

"Thought nothing was too hot for you." Laughed Ianto digging in to his food. "So you going to tell me why you're drinking more than normal? I'm guessing it has to do with our trip to London."

Owens face turned serious "Yeah it just brought up bad times for me there."

"Katie?" Ianto said.

"Katie's part of the reason but also my childhood." Ianto didn't say anything, he just waited for Owen to continue at his own speed. "You know my mum kicked me out when I was sixteen?" Ianto shook his head in response as Owen carried on " Well she did. Can't say it wasn't a relief, so then I had to get a job to put myself through college, then university and then med school. But do you know what? When I graduated it was the best feeling knowing I'd done it all on my own."

"God Owen and I thought my childhood was bad. No wonder you don't like London. I'm sorry."

"Not your fault." Said Owen dismissively. He really didn't like talking about his past but with Ianto it just seemed to come out whether he wanted it to or not. "Anyway enough of me let's get back to you and your cleaning habits."

"There are worse habits than cleaning." Ianto said trying to lighten the mood a bit.

"Yeah like what?" Said Owen.

"Like leaving purple alien bits in the autopsy bay for me to clean up." Grinned Ianto pointing his fork at Owen.

"What a lovely smile." Owen thought to himself then quickly thought "Where did that come from?" "Yes that one was gross." Laughed Owen remembering he'd been in a hurry to get to a pub that he'd left the cleaning to Ianto. "So back on topic, cleaning, your obsesssiveness more to the point."

Ianto hesitated. "It's not obsessive. It just... it calms me. I call it therapeutic."

"But all that cleanig can't be good for your hands or your health." Owen said with concern.

Ianto frowned at him "What do you mean my health and I try and wear rubber gloves if I can."

Smirking slightly Owen said, "I bet you do." before adding, "Think about it Ianto all those chemicals you use and all the fumes you must breath in. It really can't be doing your lungs any good. Tomorrow you are going to have a full physical make sure you've not damaged anything. So how you sleeping?"

"If I told you fine would you believe me?" Ianto sulkily replied not looking forward to tomorrow.

"Nope."

"Didn't think so. Ok if you must know lousy. Ever since London I've been getting two maybe three hours a night." Admitted Ianto getting up and picking the glasses off the table to get them both refills. He had a feeling it was going to be a long night. "Well at least the companys good." He mused to himself.

While Ianto was at the bar Owen was thinking "No wonder he looks crap if the most sleep he's been getting is three hours; sooner or later he's going to break. Looks like Jack was right. Now to get him to talk and then find a solution."

"Penny for them?" Ianto asked setting the beers down as he sat.

Owen was statled from his thoughts "Uh what?"

"Penny for your thoughts. You were miles away when I came back. What or who were you thinking about?"

"You." Owen quietly said.

It was Iantos turn to be startled "Be serious Owen." He laughed nervously.

"I was. I was thinking how can anyone survive on three hours sleep without falling apart?"

"Look it's no big deal." Ianto said getting angry.

"It is when it starts affecting the rest of us." Owen retorted back.

Ianto was getting angrier. "But it's not affecting you or anyone else so I don't see what the problem is."

Owen was beginning to get angry himself "Why couldn't Ianto see how it was affecting him." He thought but instead replied, "The problem is," he hissed "that if we're out in the field and your concentration goes through lack of sleep then someone could get injured or worse."

Ianto stared at Owen. Did he really think he would put any of them in danger?

"Owen," he began softly some of the anger having disapated "do you really think I would put any of you in danger?"

Owen looked at him and just as softly replied "I don't think you would intentionally put anyone in danger, but you know what lack of sleep can cause. It slows your reaction time down considerably. Tell me this, are the nightmares from London that bad or is there something else going on?"

Ianto had tears in his eyes as he admitted "It's just from London. All I can see when I close my eyes are the Cybermen and Daleks coming for me shouting 'Exterminate' or 'You will be deleted' and then there's all the other noises and smells. I'm too scared to go to sleep but when it gets too much and I manage to, then I wake up in a sweat with all those thoughts running through my head, then I can't get back to sleep. That's when I clean or go for a run."

At some point Owen had taken Iantos hand and was stroking it in encouragement. "At least you're now admitting you've got a problem and I will do my best to help you, but you should've come to me sooner."

"Owen you were dealing with your own demons. You didn't need me adding to them." He said thinking how nice Owens hand felt holding his.

Owen looked down at their joined hands and then feeling embarrassed pulled his away. He didn't see the sad look that passed over Iantos face. "Look I can give you a sleeping tablet that will knock you out for at least eight hours but there is a side effect."

"Which is?" Ianto asked regaining his composure.

"They might make you feel drowsy in the morning so you wont be able to drive or go out in the field. And then we try and find a better way to get you to sleep." Owen replied seriously then to lighten the mood added. "If you go home now you should still be up to get into work before the rest of us."

Ianto sat for a moment then agreed. As they stood to put their jackets on Ianto spoke.

"So as I bought you dinner do I need to walk you home or are you going to walk me?" He asked with a smile.

Owen laughed. "If I walk you do I get a coffee at the end of it?"

"As long as it's just a coffee you're after Dr Harper - you wouldn't take advantage of a patient would you?" Smirked Ianto walking out the pub.

They didn't walk in the end but picked Owens car up from the Hub and Owen drove Ianto home. Once there Owen decided that Ianto needed sleep more than he needed coffee. He did get out the car and walk him to the front door of his building. Ianto then turned to him and stared into his eyes.

"Thanks Owen for everything and I promise I will talk more about London and my nightmares if you promise me you wont drink anymore and talk to me. I'm here for you whenever you need me." He said softly.

Owens breath hitched at the intensity behind those words and all he could do was nod. Then Ianto pulled him into a hug and whispered in his ear "Remember anytime you need me I'm here for you."

Before he could reply Ianto had entered his building leaving a bemused Owen on the doorstep who then walked back to his car in a daze but with a smile on his face. For the first time in three weeks he didn't feel the need to get blind drunk.

***

Next part of Returning To London.