Title: Loving You
By: minimumstitch
Pairing: Jack/Ianto
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: Torchwood is not owned by me but is owned by the BBC and RTD and I am just enjoying playing with their characters.
Summary: Ianto makes a declaration which panics Jack.

***

As soon as Owen had treated Ianto's injuries he and the others made a hasty exit, leaving Jack and Ianto alone. The tension in the treatment room was palpable, the Captain's anger meeting the archivist's steely determination.

"Why did you do it? I gave you direct orders…orders which you wilfully chose to disobey!"

"With all due respect, your orders were illogical and ill-thought out."

For a moment Jack was speechless, but that moment passed quickly. "How dare you! It is not your job to disobey my orders, it is your job to do as I say, and if I say to keep back, you damn well stay back!"

The young Welshman just looked at him and Jack's anger grew at the arousal he could see in his eyes. "You're not paying a damn bit of attention to me, are you?"

Ianto smirked. "On the contrary, Sir, I am giving you my whole attention. Did I ever tell you, you are extremely hot when you are angry? I always thought blue was your colour, but red really does suit you."

With that Jack seemed to deflate. "Why? Why did you do it? I had it under control!"

Ianto shook his head. "You didn't have it under control; you were going to sacrifice yourself in order to kill the damn thing!"

"You know I always come back…" Jack whispered.

"I do…and I also know that it hurts like hell when you do. You hurt Jack, and when you hurt, so do I. I love you, you idiot… and if I can stop you killing yourself I will."

Panic flittered across Jack's face and he turned away, trying to gather his thoughts after his lover's declaration.

"Jack, this doesn't change anything. I have loved you for quite a while now and the world hasn't ended."

"You can't love me, I won't allow it! Love only clouds your judgement, hell, look at the state you are in now! Just stop it! Stop loving me!"

Ianto only shook his head in bemusement. "Not an option, I'm afraid. Do you honestly think it's a choice, something I can turn off like the turning of a tap? It's damned inconvenient really. It's not as though life with you is easy, excluding the Torchwood crap!"

"What do you mean…? I'm the easiest person in the world to be with! Anyone would be lucky to have me!"

"Of course they would…I always wanted to fall in love with a, however old you are, immortal man. Not to mention the fact that you flirt with anything that has a pulse; whether I am there or not. You have embarrassed me too many times to count and almost got us arrested for indecent exposure twice! Plus, you have the worst manners in the world; you talk with your mouth full, eat as if you've never seen food before, hog the covers and cheat at Hide and Seek! Not to mention that you are so moody and stubborn…and you always think you know best! "

Jack looked dumbfounded, before looking pleased. "So you don't love me then? I told you!"

"None of those stop me loving you; they just make me aware that I have the patience of a saint. Jack, loving you is not a choice, I would do anything to stop you getting hurt and that includes dying for you."

Jack strode angrily towards Ianto. "Don't you say that, don't you dare! Nobody dies for me, nobody! Do you understand me? I won't allow it!"

Ianto stood and wrapped his arms around his lover. "I can't promise that, I'm sorry, Cariad, but that is the one thing I cannot promise. Jack, you gave me life, don't think I don't know that you brought me back when Lisa killed me. Ever since then, you have given me something to live for, you have given me love, something I thought I'd never have again, and I would happily die to keep you safe."

Jack clung to Ianto, before pulling away and gazing intently into his lover's eyes. "Ianto, it hurts when I die and yes, it hurts when I come back, but the hurt fades in moments. If I lost you…that pain wouldn't fade, it would be continuous and forever. Please, please don't make me go through that, I love you and I don't want to lose you any sooner than I have to."

Ianto kissed him softly. "Alright, but if there is a way to help you, a way that doesn't involve me getting killed, I will take it, okay?"

"Okay." Jack kissed Ianto and released the young man. "Now, I think it's time I give you a once over, make sure that Owen didn't miss anything."

Ianto arched an eyebrow. "Oh really, and I suppose I need to be naked for this?"

"Of course, it's not much of a once over if you are fully clothed now, is it?"

"Well, in that case, I think I need to check that you didn't sustain any injuries either."

Jack grinned and lifted the leather strap on his wrist, shutting down the CCTV cameras. "Did I tell you I love you, Mr Jones?"

***