Title: Revenge is Sexy
By: x-juicy-lucy-x
Pairing: Jack/Ianto
Rating: AO
Warning: WiP
Summary: Jack wants revenge on Ianto.

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Jack winced and though of all of his favourite things in the world… like Ben and Jerry's ice cream, coffee, Pacman, and sex. Unfortunately it wasn't enough to distract him; he failed to check himself in time and ended up letting out a high pitched keening noise and wriggling exasperatedly. In any other situation, this would not have mattered so much, but the handcuffs and leather bindings were already chafing him, and the dirty chuckle from behind him did nothing to make him feel any more dignified.

"Shut up, Ianto." He growled, wishing the younger man would hurry up already, the waiting was killing him.

"I don't think you're in any position to be telling me what to do, Sir." Ianto replied, a sarcastic emphasis on the last word. "Anyway, don't take your frustration out on me."

"But it's you causing it!" Jack practically whined, pouting at the same time. A sigh came from behind him.

"It's hardly Teaboy's fault, really, is it?" Owen drawled. "I mean, he didn't ask you to fall backwards off a building straight onto the spines of the giant porcupine, and land on your surprisingly plump arse, did he?" Jack could just tell that Owen was smirking, and it made him feel even more cross. "In fact, he even protested when I knocked you out and strapped you down so I could remove the spines without being punched."

"I did try, Jack." Ianto intoned sympathetically. Jack snorted in response, wincing as Owen pulled out another spine.

"So, I think the only person to blame here is yourself. Now hold the fuck still whilst I get these last 3 out, then you can be untied."

"When I'm untied, first I'm going to punch you, then I'm going to strap Ianto to this table and make him squirm just like I did." Jack growled, just a little too threateningly for Ianto's liking.

"Oh dear God!" Owen groaned, "TMI, TM-fucking-I!" He yanked the last spines out unceremoniously, causing Jack to squeak like a little girl, then stalked out of the room, calling over his shoulder, "You can release him when you see fit, Teaboy. I'd leave him there to cool off though if I were you."

"Ianto." Jack warned, "I was most definitely not joking about the tying you up thing…" Ianto considered the idea of being strapped down to the medical bench, but only for a moment. Instead, he did the manly thing, pressed the button to release the bindings, and then legged it as fast as he could towards the car park.

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