Title: Skin of Your Teeth
By: sqyd
Characters/Pairings: Jack/Ianto, team
Rating: NC17
Warnings: angst, verging on AU
Word count: 3,000
Disclaimers: I don't own Torchwood or any of the characters. If I did, I'd take better care of them.
Summary: Jack and Ianto from the start. Countrycide - They Keep Killing Suzie.
Beta: The amazing and tireless Rootesie. Naturally, I couldn’t stop messing with it. All mistakes are mine alone
Notes: Follows The Lover's Breath

**************************

Ianto is angry. He's angry with Jack for dragging them out into the godforsaken middle of nowhere, angry with Owen for whining incessantly, even angry with Tosh for being Owen's willing doormat. Most of all he's angry at bloody Gwen; Miss I-have-a-life-outside-of-Torchwood is getting it on with Owen, Miss bloody bleeding heart trampling all over Tosh's. So he flings her tactlessness back into her face. Deep down he knows he's being unfair, but he just doesn't care. He also doesn't care about Jack giving him that look. At least he's stopped looking so bloody pleased with himself.

Of course, since they are Torchwood, everything goes to shit, putting his pettiness in perspective. Instant fucking karma, indeed.

**************************

The road to hell is paved with good intentions. The team is lacking crucial unity. Suzie's homicidal deceit started a crack that was widened by Ianto's own. Gwen's addition to the team has created a weird tension between her, Owen and Tosh, and meanwhile Ianto is doing his 'fading into the background' routine again, undoing any progress they have made during his suspension. So Jack decides to use the disappearing tourists as an excuse to force them all into a team bonding exercise. Out in the middle of nowhere, forced together, in tents, there might be screaming and shouting, gnashing of teeth, they might come to blows, but at the end they should be stronger for it.

Of course, things go pear-shaped almost immediately. The gnashing of teeth part starts sooner than expected, and he is also more involved than he wants to be. Just then things take a sharp turn to Hell with the grisly discovery of a very human, and very dead body. From there it only gets worse and worse. At one point it occurs to Jack that he might lose his whole team in one fell swoop, and the terror of that thought puts him into an adrenaline-overdrive.

Thank Goddess, they all come out of it alive, even if banged up. Gwen is covered in blood, Owen can barely contain his rage, Tosh is shaking, and Ianto sits at the back of the SUV with a thousand-yard stare. Bloody well done, Harkness.

The drive back to Cardiff is spent in drained silence. Tosh asks to be dropped off at her place on the way. Since she is - physically at least - only slightly hurt, Jack agrees. He helps her into her flat, and tells her to feel free to call him at any time. At the Hub, Owen changes the dressing on Gwen's wounds for one last time, gives her some more pain medications and takes her home - his or hers is not clear. Ianto, who has spent the entire drive back staring out the window is doing that infuriating thing of his, completely shutting everyone out and preparing to hide away like an injured animal.

He catches Ianto before the stubborn mule can sneak out the door.

"You shouldn't be driving."

"Sir?"

"You're on three kinds of pain killers and muscle relaxants - not in the condition to be behind a wheel. I'll drive you home. C'mon."

Ianto grimaces, but follows him to the SUV. Again, it's a far too quiet a drive, Ianto's eyes are half-closed, he's sitting stiff as a dummy. Once they get to the flat, Jack invites himself in, despite the annoyance radiating from the young man. Ianto heads straight to the bathroom, leaving Jack in the living room. Jack shuts the door, takes his coat and boots off before heading after him. He finds Ianto in struggle with his sore and stiff muscles trying to peel off his t-shirt. He automatically steps closer to help, but Ianto pulls away.

"Let me help."

"Why? After everything, why do you even care?" He sounds more miserable than angry.

Jack stills, hand outstretched, still holding the hem of the dark cotton.

"Because I fucked up too, and I'd like to set things right between us. You are hurt. You need someone look after you," he says truthfully.

"What the fuck makes you think you can help? I have a gaping hole where my heart used to be, and you think I should just get over it!"

"Ianto, she tried to kill us! It wasn't the best idea to bring her up."

"She wasn't always a monster, you know, she used to be a human being!"

Jack knows he is not wrong, but then neither is Ianto. Jack has had centuries to get used to loss, and is still rubbish at it, and Ianto is barely twenty-five. He should be more lenient with someone so young. Anyway, there is no harm making concessions to a man in pain.

"You're right. Why don't we get you cleaned up, and then you can tell me all about her, okay?"

His voice is a comforting low murmur, the kind one would use to coax a skittish animal to safety.

"Please, let me help." He tugs the shirt very gently, and shuffles a little closer when he feels Ianto's stiffness relaxing a bit. He pulls him into an embrace that Ianto slowly returns.

"Stay tonight?" Ianto whispers into his shoulder.

"I will. Whether you want me or not."

He carefully strips the clothing off a much-subdued Ianto, and pushes him under the shower. Seeing him sway, Jack sheds his own clothes and steps in after him. He washes Ianto's hair, gingerly scrubs the dirt and blood off the bruised body. It's a remarkably chaste affair. He helps Ianto out and makes sure he can dry himself without falling over, before swiftly scrubbing himself clean. When he enters the bedroom, wrapped in a towel, he finds Ianto rummaging through a drawer. Jack is offered a pair of drawstring pants, which he obediently puts on. Normally he sleeps in the buff, but that would not do just now. Ianto is wearing adorable flannel pajama pants, and has a t-shirt out that Jack helps him get into.

Ianto climbs into bed. Jack turns off the lights and climbs in next to him. He turns on his side, facing Ianto.

"Now tell me all about her."

Ianto huffs and is silent for a little, then he begins to talk. He speaks haltingly first, then more relaxed. He falls asleep in the middle of a sentence.

The nightmares start a couple of hours later. Ianto's in REM sleep, he should be paralyzed, but his arms are twitching and he mumbles. Jack lays a hand on his chest, leans closer and whispers soft, shushing nothings into his ears. He concentrates on pushing calming thoughts out. He thinks of a warm summer night under the stars and an inky blue sky. He feels Ianto's body relax under his hand. Then Ianto rolls towards him, throws his lose limbs over him, and settles in tight with a contented little exhale. It feels familiar, although they've never been like this before. Jack realizes he's missed this, for god knows how long. He knows he should go, slip out of bed before they make a mess of things again, keep his distance, but he's a selfish bastard, and after the day they had he needs comfort too.

**************************

He must be more tired than he thought, because he falls asleep, and when he wakes up he's lying on his side, with Ianto curled around his back, one arm around Jack's chest, palm splayed, feeling for his heartbeat. There is also a very hard erection pressing against his arse through a thin layer of cotton. He could write it off as a case of unintended morning wood, but he can tell that the only clothing between the two of them is Jack's pants.

"This is a very bad idea," he exhales in place of 'good morning'.

Ianto doesn't answer, but bites Jack's neck, softly, teeth gently scraping against skin, tongue licking between them, lips sucking. His lips move lower a few inches and he repeats. And again. Jack's muscles tense with the want for this to continue. He's hyper-aware of every point of contact. The soft hair rubbing against his back sets off a secret kink of his. He wants this. So. Fucking. Bad.

"You're still grieving," He groans with the last of his resolve. A shiver of regret runs through him when Ianto stills. Then he moves again, shifting his weight, pushing Jack onto his back, slinging a leg over to straddle him. Ianto is flushed, but looks very solemn for a second.

"You know how it is," he says, and he leans forward, kissing him.

Jack hopes he does, whatever "it" is. Ianto makes small bites along Jack's jaw line, but he stops just under his ear, and begins to whisper.

"You're miserable, but you go on…" He bites down ever so lightly. "Because the rational part of you knows that it'll get better, but it's hard." He leaves open-mouthed kisses on the shell of Jack's ear.

Jack shudders, not just from the physical sensation - he begins to sense something else too.

"I almost died."

"I know," Jack groans back.

"I'd never felt so terrified in my life. I didn't want to die," Ianto murmurs almost confessionally.

Jack can feel it stronger now.

"I want to live Jack, and I want to feel more than just guilt and misery. You can help. You said you would." There's an almost childish petulance in his voice, and he bites down again, and it's harder this time. More ravenous.

The wave of Ianto's want and desire washes over Jack. It's raw and needy, but there's nothing uncertain about it.

It is an incredible rush, not that he needed it; he's been hard since he woke up. There are many, very good reasons why he shouldn't be doing this, but they're lost in the fog of desire. He helpfully lifts his hips to help Ianto push his pants down. Slender, slick fingers press their cocks together - Ianto clearly thought this through. He laces his fingers with Ianto's and they begin to move.

Somehow it's different now than it used to be. Not the mechanics of it, that's the same, but it's somehow more intense. There used to be always something passive about Ianto, as if he was afraid of taking more than he was allowed. He's not holding back now. It's almost rough; Ianto's teeth scrape over Jack's collarbone, his fingers dig into flesh. Jack doesn't mind rough, he could take it much rougher.

"Let go Jack, let me feel you," Ianto urges, so Jack lets him. His arousal is tinged with regrets. Ianto gasps at them, but doesn't let up.

Jack comes first, but as soon as his orgasm crests Ianto's is following him.

**************************

Jack is of the opinion that lying in a decent size bed in post-coital bliss, with a sexy young thing draped over him is something he could get used to. He's very comfortable with the idea of sex for comfort, but he's too familiar with 21st century hang-ups. He knows that there is a very good chance that Ianto will bolt next. 

"Ianto…"

"I know what you're thinking. I'm fine."

"I just want to be sure it's not just the pheromones."

Ianto snorts. "You overestimate the effects of your pheromones. If you haven't noticed, they don't do anything for Tosh, and Owen's not likely to jump your bones any time soon either. Gwen might, but I suspect she's oversexed to begin with."

"Oh, and what does that make you?"

"Dedicated?"

Jack laughingly squeezes his shoulder and feels him wince.

"Sorry!"

"It's okay."

Jack runs his fingers lightly over bruises mottling purple.

"Does it hurt?"

"A little. I took my pills."

"Stay home for a few days."

"I can't."

"You can. You'll be sore."

"I have work to do."

"It'll keep."

"Weevils need feeding," Ianto insists with characteristic stubbornness.

"I'll take care of it."

"Myfanwy…"

"I'll take care of it." The playful exasperation in Jack’s voice doesn’t completely hide the commanding undertone.

"Mpppf." There is a shade to Ianto’s protesting grumble that suggests that he doesn’t quite trust Jack’s abilities to take care of these basic tasks.

His indignant expression is just too much for Jack. He - very carefully - rolls over him and pins him down.

"Two days. And I promise to bring you dinner."

"Okay, but only Two days."

**************************

Things go smoother for a while after the Cannibals. Ianto smiles again, makes sarcastic little quips. Jack dares to flirt with him once again. Naturally, it's not perfect; Jack knows from experience that Ianto is at a place where one small, random thing can set off a painful chain of thoughts.

It's past midnight when Jack gets back to the Hub, and it should be empty, but there are signs of Ianto still being around. He calls out for him, but there is no answer. He checks the current CCTV feed, but they show nothing. He is about to search back, but instead sets off on a hunch. He finds Ianto in the room where Lisa was once hidden.

They emptied the room back then, during the cleanup, so for most part now it is just like any other nondescript windowless room, an undetermined distance below ground. However, the blood never completely cleaned off from the raw cement floor. It was absorbed by the porous material, leaving a very big dark stain. It isn’t red any more, just dark dirt gray; it could’ve been anything, if you didn’t already know.

The sight of Ianto lying on top of the blotch, straight and stiff like a funeral display, is disconcertingly morbid. Jack walks close enough to be in Ianto's line of sight if he should choose to turn his head.

"You shouldn't be doing this to yourself."

"I thought it might help. Finding closure, letting go, that sort of thing." Ianto says to the ceiling.

"Is it working?" Jack moves closer.

"I don't know. Maybe."

Jack lies down on the cold concrete floor, next to Ianto, arms touching.

He'd like to say something to make it better, or at least show that he understands. He could tell Ianto about all the people he has lost, but that wouldn't exactly be a consolation. The world is unfair, the good die young far too often, and those who live to ripe old age aren't always the ones who deserve it. Meanwhile here he is, living forever, and just muddling through it.

"I'm a bastard," he says instead.

"Sometimes."

"This won't end well."

Ianto turns his head to look at Jack. "Does it ever?"

**************************

It's bizarre, but Torchwood has paperwork for everything. Once Mary is gone, it falls to Ianto to sit down with Tosh and fill out the forms. He smiles and tries to put her at ease, but he can feel the confusion, the pain and distrust radiating out of her. He feels for her; the mind-reading necklace instantly burdened her with all that Ianto had a lifetime to get used to, and still finds sometimes difficult to deal with. He can't imagine how it must have been for her. She doesn't understand that she was deceived by the necklace, giving her only surface impressions, missing all the important complexities beneath.

He watches Jack and Tosh out on the Plass on the CCTV. When Jack leaves the still crying Tosh, Ianto slips out of the Hub, bundles her up and takes her home. He doesn't ask or offer, just does it, since as long as he's concerned, it's part of his job. He takes care of them when they need it, and it's now Tosh's turn.

He deposits her on the sofa and goes into the bedroom. He changes the sheets, removes all traces of Mary. He leaves Tosh to get to bed while he sweeps the rest of the place. He cleans the kitchen, washes up. Before leaving he checks on Tosh and tucks her in. She looks at him with big wet eyes.

"Ianto, I'm sorry."

"What for, Tosh?"

"You are still in pain. I had no idea."

He sits down by her side and takes her hand into his.

"It's not like that, Tosh. You must have caught me in a bad moment. Grief comes and goes, but it's really getting better, trust me." He brushes her hair. "What's foremost on people's minds is not what they are all about. People are complicated, the best parts are usually hidden away." He kisses her on the forehead before standing to leave. "It's going to be all right, I promise."

When he gets back to the Hub Owen and Gwen are gone, but Jack is waiting for him. To his questioning look he just nods in reply. Jack takes him out to dinner, and over dessert he accepts Jack's offer to train his own psychic shielding.

**************************

When Suzie comes back from the dead, Ianto's only mildly surprised. To be honest, he's almost thankful to her; her antics push Ianto way down on the list of Torchwood villains. At the time he was grateful for his suspension. Even so, he still sensed the little barbs of distrust and wariness when he returned, but those were to be expected. The surges of pity were far worse. He found it hard to deal with at first, and instinctually did his best to slip into the background. Out of sight, out of mind. It only changed after he and Jack found their way back to each other. He cared less after that. Then he learned to keep them out.

He doesn't need special talent to see the weariness and dejection in Jack after the Suzie business is brought to an end. Their Captain, his Jack, needs help, distraction, comfort, and don't let it be said that Ianto doesn't know his duties. Plus, he's been incredibly and inappropriately horny for hours. He propositions Jack over Suzie's cold dead body. Jack seems confused for a second, but Ianto prevails. Eventually, the stopwatch triggers the appropriate reflexes, and Jack rushes off to kick everyone out of the Hub.

**************************

On his way to Jack's office Ianto pauses to take a good look at the figure behind the desk before he's noticed. Jack looks tired. Human. Ianto feels a moment of vertigo, but pulls himself together. Here they go again. He tells himself it's different this time. There is nothing left to hide. He walks in.

"Jack." He smiles.

Jack's looks up at him suddenly expectantly.

"So, stopwatch..." Jack grins.

Ianto looks at the object in question that he is still holding in his hand. He puts it away.

"Not tonight."

He steps flush with Jack, draws him close, cups his face, and kisses him softly.

"Let me take care of you."

Next story in series - Nooks and Crannies