Title: Time Out of Mind
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Tenth Doctor/Jack Harkness
Fandom: Doctor Who/Torchwood
Rating: PG
Table: 1
Prompt: 43, Time
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my own imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the Tenth Doctor or Jack Harkness. Please do not sue.

***

Time. It stretched far behind him, years, decades, centuries. And far in front of him -- hopefully for a long time to come.

Or was that what he really wanted? the Doctor thought, leaning back in his chair and clasping his hands behind his head, looking up at the ceiling of the Tardis' control room. Did he really want this life to go on and on, indefinitely, with no end in sight?

That was what Jack had -- immortality. And Jack didn't seem happy with it, not at all. Funny, most humans would probably give anything they owned to have the gift of life that Jack possessed, and one of the few men who didn't want it was the one who it had been granted to.

The people who wanted more and more time were the ones who had the least of it, and the ones who didn't care about it seemed to have more than an ample supply. At least, that was how it worked to his way of thinking.

Time was something he'd always had plenty of, and something that he'd never taken for granted, as so many beings did. But then, he was a Time Lord. He knew enough about the workings of time to be cautious with it. Most people didn't.

He'd often thought about going back to rearrange things in his own timeline, to see if he could make things better, make them different. That was always a hard temptation to avoid ....

But he coudln't. Well, not couldn't. He wouldn't do it. He'd seen too often how tampering with time worked out; he might have thought at one time that it was something he could do with few or no consequences, but he knew better now.

The temptation was always there, of course. But it was one of the rules of being what he was -- he couldn't change outcomes. He coudn't interfere in history -- either the world's, or his own. He'd learned that the hard way, far too often.

He wasn't going to try that again. The few times he had, he'd almost caused more of a problem than what was already happening. Of course, he'd done it a few times for the good of humanity -- but those were special cases, not to be repeated.

Besides, wasn't it horribly selfish to want to change his own timeline? He had to learn to accept how his life was, and deal with it, as everyone else did.

There had been times when he'd had to struggle with what he was; with the responsibilities that came along with being a Time Lord, wishing that he wasn't bound by them. But somehow, he always came to grips with whatever inner crisis he was dealing with.

Maybe that was part of being what he was -- learning to deal with it, accepting it and moving on. Goodness knows he'd had to do that enough in his long life, but seemingly, never more than he had since he'd been in this particular body.

He blinked up at the ceiling, sighing and reluctantly removing his feet from the console. He couldn't sit here thinking about things that weren't really relevant, wasting what time he had here. He was on Earth, and his time here always seemed a bit limited.

The Doctor frowned, standing up and shoving his hands into his pockets. That time limit was by his own choice, if he was honest with himself. He'd imposed that on himself.

Ridiculous that he was so reluctant to spend time with Jack. Ridiculous that a part of him turned away from the other man now that they were no longer emotionally involved. But that was another problem, something to contemplate at some other time.

He allowed himself a wry grin at that thought. Some other time. What better time than now, when he was here on Earth, as close to Jack as he'd been for quite a while?

There it was again. Time. Why did that words always keep popping up? Perhaps because he had too much of it on his hands lately. A Time Lord, with too much time and nothing to do to fill it. He could almost laugh at that idea.

The truth was, he was afraid to see Jack. Afraid of what he might still feel if he saw the other man again. And no amount of time spent away from the immortal could change that.

Taking a deep breath, the Doctor looked towards the door of the Tardis. That was the first step. Go outside, then make his way to the Hub. Search Jack out, and talk to him. Face his own emotions -- and find out if Jack still harbored any of his own.

It was past time he took that step, he said to himself as he strode purposefully to the door. He had to spend the time he had wisely, just like anyone else did. And it was far, far past time that he'd made the decision to see Jack again.

The Doctor closed his eyes for a moment as he put a shaking hand to the door of the Tardis. He wasn't going to put this off until later, as he usually convinced himself to do. He might have time -- but he knew better than most how easily time could slip away.

Opening the door, he stepped out into the bright sunlight of Cardiff, bent on making the most of the time that he would be there.

***