Title: Untitled L&O/CSI: NY
By: carolinecrane
Fandom: Law & Order: SVU/CSI: New York
Pairing: Stella/Olivia
Rating: R
Summary: Ficlet #7, for coffeewordangel, who requested femmeslash I couldn't write and then settled for this.

***

"I just don't want to talk about it, okay?"

Olivia's voice is gentle, but it still says 'don't argue with me'. And she gets it, because her job is just as hard and just as depressing. So she gets the need to forget about it some nights, gets that that's why they're here instead of at some bar flirting with whoever or making dinner for husbands and kids out in the suburbs somewhere. It's a hard life for people who deal with death all day, and she knows better than to wish for it.

So she leans forward, long hair falling over her shoulders as her mouth finds Olivia's. "So let's not talk," Stella says, hand sliding down Olivia's side to push up under her tank top.

It's one of those hot New York nights where everything sticks to you and the air's too thick to breathe, so she's not surprised at the relieved sigh when she peels Olivia's flimsy tank top off. There's an old fan in the corner, pushing the air around a little, and when the breeze hits Olivia's chest her nipples instantly harden. Stella flattens her palm against one, mouth still moving against Olivia's until she gasps and breaks the kiss to arch up into Stella's hand.

She's beautiful like this, one knee drawn up and panties already damp and when it's like this Stella can almost forget that they don't really know each other. They don't go out and they don't talk about their jobs or the lives they don't have. They don't have beers after a hard day at the office; they don't even work in the same office, although the job is what brought them together. And they still don't talk about that case – no one talks about that case – but there's a small part of her that's not sorry, because it means she gets to see Olivia the way she is now.

Not at her most vulnerable. Stella's never seen that and she doubts she ever will, but when Olivia's eyes squeeze shut and her lips part on a gasp it's easy to pretend. Easy to let herself believe that they're here because they want to be, that this is what makes them happy. And it could be, if they let it, but she knows Olivia well enough to understand that she won't let Stella in that far.

But she lets Stella see part of her. Pushes her legs apart to let Stella press two fingers inside, hand tangled in her hair and pushing her down, sighing at the soft kisses brushed between her breasts, across her stomach, along the smooth skin of her inner thighs. She lets Stella have this, gives as much in return and it's enough.

It has to be, because it's as far as Olivia's willing to go, and Stella knows her well enough to see that that's not going to change.

***